Attraction

April_Rose · Apr 21, 2021

So what do you guys think? Do you think that thinking that somebody is attractive is the same as lusting after them? I don't because I think a lot of women are really beautiful but that doesn't mean that I want to hop into bed with them. I think that it's only a problem in a romantic relationship or no when the thoughts turn sexual.

Wynona · Apr 21, 2021

I don't think they are the same. But in the past, where there was attraction on my part to the opposite gender, lust quickly followed.

For me, attraction isn't purely visual. It's my thoughts. And for a while, my thoughts were influenced by some very lustful music. So of course, my norm was that lust quickly followed attraction.

When I ditched the sensual music, battles with lust became a lot easier to deal with. Now, it stops at attraction.

quietthinker · Apr 21, 2021

Attraction reflects one's own value. If you love money, it'll attract you....if you love rock'n'roll, it'll attract you.....if you love smooth words and flattery, it'll attract you.......if you love a straight shooter, you'll be going there. If straight shooting is threatening one distances oneself. One only needs to listen to what one speaks of and one can tell what it is that is attractive to that person.

Rita · Apr 22, 2021

No I don’t think they are the same, but I do think that attraction to someone, or some thing, can lead to lust and a desire to want more. Look at how king David fell , it was attraction that led to him wanting more and ultimately led to adultery ect. Rita

April_Rose · Apr 22, 2021

Barbara said:
No I don’t think they are the same, but I do think that attraction to someone, or some thing, can lead to lust and a desire to want more. Look at how king David fell , it was attraction that led to him wanting more and ultimately led to adultery ect. Rita

Wynona said:
I don't think they are the same. But in the past, where there was attraction on my part to the opposite gender, lust quickly followed.

For me, attraction isn't purely visual. It's my thoughts. And for a while, my thoughts were influenced by some very lustful music. So of course, my norm was that lust quickly followed attraction.

When I ditched the sensual music, battles with lust became a lot easier to deal with. Now, it stops at attraction.

That's why I picked the third option as I don't think they are quite the same thing but attraction can lead to lust if one isn't careful.

Sacred Word · Apr 25, 2021

With this, think of the 10 commandments.

Lust applies to adultery, meaning to spoil (breaking the marriage covenant, but also degrading a person) as well as coveting, meaning to sneakily go after what is another's, not loving them like yourself, in this case viewing them as a sex object.

It is fine to be attracted to someone, even sexually. But be sure that you have a respectful attitude towards them.

That's a key word here: respect.

Michael1985 · May 2, 2021

Human beings have eyes. They notice beautiful things, including other human beings. That doesn't change with being in a relationship.

thelord's_pearl · May 2, 2021

No, if you think someone is attractive, it is not necessarily lusting and even if you do struggle with lust 'cause you find the opposite sex attractive, you can't help that, God covers you and you always pray and thank and ask Him for forgiveness. I've asked a similar question on CF forums before. I made an interesting thread on whether you can be friends with someone who's married even if you find them attractive and so on.

dev553344 · May 2, 2021

I think lust and attraction are two very different things.

People that love to steal lust after other peoples things, which is where the adultery came in in the bible. The definition of lust is to have a very strong desire for something. In lust your already lost in the attempt to gain an other's property. This is why the bible states that if you lust after a woman you have committed adultery in your heart already. Because your lost in a strong desire to gain that object.

Attraction can just be someone pleasant to be around.Or you might be attracted to a cool looking car. It's when you allow yourself to give into that strong desire to get that car that you lust after it.

April_Rose · May 2, 2021

thelord's_pearl said:
No, if you think someone is attractive, it is not necessarily lusting and even if you do struggle with lust 'cause you find the opposite sex attractive, you can't help that, God covers you and you always pray and thank and ask Him for forgiveness. I've asked a similar question on CF forums before. I made an interesting thread on whether you can be friends with someone who's married even if you find them attractive and so on.

It's really silly to think that you can't be friends with someone if they are such and such. I say you can be friends with anybody you want as long as they have a good set of morals.

April_Rose · May 2, 2021

What's with the dots?

FHII · May 2, 2021

Ladies, would you like to here the truth? If not, don't read any further!

ALL men will find other ladies attractive, and ALL men will have lust in their heart, even if its fleeting and temporary. And frankly, I am pretty sure that goes for you ladies as well!

Is it possible to find someone attractive and not lust after them? Absolutely!

Sorry, but that is the truth even if your boyfriend or husband won't admit to it. But its more important how the man and you (the woman) handle it. Short version: men should overcome it and keep their vows. Women should realize it happens and not hold it against them IF they keep their vow.

thelord's_pearl · May 2, 2021

April_Rose said:
What's with the dots?

Oh, I just thought I wasn't sure about this topic. I would like to be friends with someone who's married even if they found me attractive or I thought they were attractive but wouldn't do anything, but I would be jealous if my boyfriend/husband were to be friends with someone they thought was attractive so it depends on the girlfriend/wife. If they also find other guys attractive and are fine to be friends then it's ok, otherwise it is not or something like that?

April_Rose · May 2, 2021

thelord's_pearl said:
Oh, I just thought I wasn't sure about this topic. I would like to be friends with someone who's married even if they found me attractive or I thought they were attractive but wouldn't do anything, but I would be jealous if my boyfriend/husband were to be friends with someone they thought was attractive so it depends on the girlfriend/wife. If they also find other guys attractive and are fine to be friends then it's ok, otherwise it is not or something like that?

Like I said before, I don't see why you couldn't be friends with anybody that you wanted to.

thelord's_pearl · May 3, 2021

April_Rose said:
It's really silly to think that you can't be friends with someone if they are such and such. I say you can be friends with anybody you want as long as they have a good set of morals.

Actually I think this is also applaudable. exactly. You could also say that as long as you know that you'll both see other people as attractive too and you have trust in each other and you'll always love each other then it's ok to be friends with other women you find attractive in certain circumstances but I'm not sure about having a divided heart, is that scriptural?

thelord's_pearl · May 3, 2021

I also don't see why something like this should be so complicated and sad. I'm really confused if anyone can help me out.

April_Rose · May 3, 2021

thelord's_pearl said:
I also don't see why something like this should be so complicated and sad. I'm really confused if anyone can help me out.

You're right it shouldn't be.

Josho · May 3, 2021

Attraction can easily become lust, but not all attraction is lust.

We should look beyond looks though. There's no use being with someone who maybe the prettiest woman or man in the world, if there is nothing in common, it won't be worth it.

April_Rose · May 3, 2021

Josho said:
Attraction can easily become lust, but not all attraction is lust.

We should look beyond looks though. There's no use being with someone who maybe the prettiest woman or man in the world, if there is nothing in common, it won't be worth it.

Agreed.

thelord's_pearl · May 3, 2021

April_Rose said:
You're right it shouldn't be.

this topic to me needs more thorough discussion and analyzing.......

Attraction

Are Lust And Attraction The Same Thing?

Yes

No

They can be but they don't have to be

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