Before I began my fairly short post as it replies to the first posting here, I want to make sure, we use the scripture as a reference, but not always an absolute. What do I mean by that? God knows our hearts, and judges according to such. Just as Paul states, the law allowed sin, because we always want to get as close to the line as possible, instead of letting the law guide our hearts and thoughts.
What I am saying is I support Elishiva's decision. In her case, I believe she is following the Holy ghost as He leads. HOWEVER, I want to do a small series (which could take a little while) for people wondering about their current second marriage, and/or planning to marry a second time to a new spouse. Those who feel lead differently, PLEASE, follow the Holy Spirits guiding.
Before I address these issues however, I want to respond to some of the earlier scripture given.
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When Jesus talked about the EXCEPTIONS for divorce, he was talking about the divorced used by the Jewish people. In this culture, wives could not get the divorce, only the husbands. Often the husbands did this, because they wanted to marry another woman. Though two wives were permitted, most Jewish husbands could only afford to supply the needs for one wife Though two wives are found in many cases), and further more, most lived in small living spaces. Wives were very important in this culture, just like today. Back in this time frame the wives were responsible for much. Cooking, cleaning, cloth making, the never ending job of taking care of their kids (including at times their husbands LOL) laundry (not in the wash machine) and taking care of the pottery and so much more. Often she helped with every part of preparing the meal, (not taking it out of the microwave or paying pizza delivery LOL) and supplying the needs of any guest. Wives are just as important today of course, but the chores are a bit different. I said all of that to say this. A husband often grew to depend on his wife for much of his every day way of life. Thus, it was that much more probable that another woman often was already planning to become the mans wife that chose to divorce the wife that he had.
Further more, if a husband suspected a wife of cheating, he could simply take her to the priest, which gave the wife a drink to drink, and if she got sick, it was held as fact she was cheating, thus if they chose, she could be put to death, but often in this case she was to remain childless. Point being, it was often for selfish reasons a husband would divorce their wife.
Marriage is held to such an extreme degree in Gods eyes, that GOD HATES DIVORCE. If at all possible, one should stay with their current spouse.
What if I am being beat, or verbally abused everyday? This is uncalled for. For your own sake and the kids sake, you should find an ALTERNITIVE PLACE TO STAY at least for a while. You not only do not have to put up with such, you SHOULD NOT put up with such. HOWEVER, is this grounds for divorce?
There are two things that constitute for a biblical divorce, that is, a divorce approved by God Himself.
Matthew 19:3-9 (New King James Version)
[sup]3[/sup] The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for
just any reason?”
[sup]4[/sup] And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made[sup][
a][/sup]
them at the beginning
‘made them male and female,’[sup][
b][/sup] [sup]5[/sup] and said,
‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?[sup][
c][/sup] [sup]6[/sup] So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”
[sup]7[/sup] They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?”
[sup]8[/sup] He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. [sup]9[/sup] And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality,[sup][
d][/sup] and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”
We see Two things in this passage:
(1) God allows for divorce in the case of sexual immorality. In any given situation, though not always the best decision, the spouse has biblical RIGHT to divorce if the other is cheating on them.
(2) If there is sin on the wives behalf, if the wife has been faithful, and she remarries, the responsibility of that sin is held on the shoulders of the ex husband, and not the wife.
1 Corinthians 7:15 (New King James Version)
[sup]15[/sup] But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such
cases. But God has called us to peace.
There is no longer ANY bondage if your spouse decides to leave. This is not your call. If your spouse leaves you, (divorces you) than you have no biblical obligation to them. You are than free to remarry. When Paul speaks of being under law, or bondage, till the death of your spouse, he was talking about every situation except the exceptions that were already made by both him and Jesus.
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I have posted it one time already, but will post it again so every one is aware what is written in the contract of the divorce papers, and I want you to remember that these were the papers being talked about in scripture.
English Translation of the GET Document
"On the __________ day of the week, the __________ day of the month of __________ in the year __________ from the creation of the world according to the calendar reckoning we are accustomed to count here, in the city __________, which is located on the river __________, and situated near wells of water, I, __________, the son of __________, who today am present in the city __________, which is located on the river __________, and situated near wells of water, do willingly consent, being under no restraint, to release, to set free and put aside thee, my wife __________, daughter of __________, who art today in the city of __________, which is located on the river __________, and situated near wells of water, who has been my wife from before. Thus do I set free, release thee, and put thee aside, in order that thou may have permission and the authority over thy self to go and marry any man thou may desire. No person may hinder thee from this day onward, and thou are permitted to every man. This shall be for thee from me a bill of dismissal, a letter of release, and a document of freedom, in accordance with the law of Moses and the Sages Israel."
http://www.thejewishdivorce.com/
This can also be seen clearly in the original passage:
Deuteronomy 24 (New King James Version)
Deuteronomy 24
Law Concerning Divorce
[sup]1[/sup] “When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts
it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, [sup]2[/sup] when she has departed from his house, and goes and becomes another man’s
wife, [sup]3[/sup]
if the latter husband detests her and writes her a certificate of divorce, puts
it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her as his wife, [sup]4[/sup]
then her former husband who divorced her must not take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled; for that
is an abomination before the LORD, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the LORD your God is giving you
as an inheritance.
It should also be pointed out here, one can never return to their former spouse once one of them has had sex (or married) another.
I should note on a couple other scriptures that seem to show this was common place and not considered to be sin in the OT, except for the guilty party.
Leviticus 21:13-14 (New King James Version)
[sup]13[/sup] And he shall take a wife in her virginity. [sup]14[/sup] A widow or a divorced woman or a defiled woman
or a harlot—these he shall not marry; but he shall take a virgin of his own people as wife.
(this was laws for the Priest of that day, but not for the rest of the Jewish people. Though we are considered Priest today as Christians, it is not in the same context, as the rest of the laws in regards to such would leave many Christians out in the cold.)
(I had another good one but it ran off on me. LOL)
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Well, I think I am getting off base from where I was originally going. smile
The Reason the One Exception does not Apply to Married People
God’s original plan was for marriage to be between two people, until death do they part. He intended for the two to become one flesh at the time of the consummation of marriage. Divorce was never a part of God’s plan. It’s not an option. After the marriage there are no grounds for divorce, except for the death of a spouse. Jesus did give one exception though. And the exception is actually only allowed during the betrothal period, not the marriage. It is fornication. (Scriptures to follow)
In biblical times, a betrothal contract was created between both fathers and the two people involved. During this betrothal period, the couple was considered legally married by the signing of the contract. But if either one of them had sex with someone else during this betrothal time, it was called fornication and was grounds for divorce. (An example of this would be when Mary was found to be pregnant with Jesus prior to her marriage to Joseph. This was during their betrothal and under Jewish law he could have divorced her at that time for her supposed fornication. And he would have, had it not been for an angel appearing to him telling him not to be afraid to take Mary as his wife because she was conceived of Holy Spirit.) However, consummation of their marriage after the betrothal period was over would make it a binding marriage rather than a betrothal and any sex outside the marriage after that time was considered adultery and God made no way out for that. This is why Jesus refers to fornication as being a way out, because during the betrothal period the marriage would not have been consummated yet, so it was considered fornication. The betrothal period was the only time a divorce could take place, and not after the consummation of the marriage.
Matthew 5:31,32 “It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causes her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced commits adultery.”
Matthew 19:9 “And I say unto you, whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry commits adultery: and whoso marries her who is put away does commit adultery.”
Key debate: what is meant by "fornication"?
I
s this AFTER or JUST BEFORE the consummation of the wedding?
Now my point here is not to point the your wrong finger, but just to let every one decide for themselves what this word means.
http://strongsnumbers.com/greek/4202.htm
Transliteration: porneia
Phonetic Spelling: (por-ni'-ah)
Short Definition: fornication, idolatry
Definition: fornication, whoredom; met: idolatry.
Selected passages that the same word is used:
1 Corinthians 5:1 ὅλως ἀκούεται ἐν ὑμῖν
πορνεία, καὶ τοιαύτη πορνεία ἥτις οὐδὲ ἐν τοῖς ἔθνεσιν, ὥστε γυναῖκά τινα τοῦ πατρὸς ἔχειν.
It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and such sexual immorality as is not even named among the Gentiles, that one has his father's wife.
http://concordance.biblos.com/porneia.htm
In this passage, it talks about a father's wife, and so seems to indicate the word including and even going beyond just cheating. The word is generally described of sexual indecent acts of all kinds, including among married couples, despite their ages. This can be seen as a general reference in the rest of the scripture that this word is placed.
Other definitions of the word:
- [font="Verdana][size="2"]
- illicit sexual intercourse
- adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals etc.
- sexual intercourse with close relatives; Lev. 18
- sexual intercourse with a divorced man or woman; Mk. 10:11,
- metaph. the worship of idols
- of the defilement of idolatry, as incurred by eating the sacrifices offered to idols
[/size][/font]
http://www.studylight.org/lex/grk/view.cgi?number=4202
The meaning of this word can be many, including a cheating spouse, so often we have to go the direction that the scripture is leading.
Let us take a quick look at the word they use ffor "wife" to see if they are only referring to before the actual sexual actions take place.
Transliteration: guné
Phonetic Spelling: (goo-nay')
Short Definition: a woman, wife, my lady
Definition: a woman, wife, my lady.
Mark 12:23 ἐν τῇ ἀναστάσει [ὅταν ἀναστῶσιν] τίνος αὐτῶν ἔσται
γυνή; οἱ γὰρ ἑπτὰ ἔσχον αὐτὴν γυναῖκα.
In the resurrection, when they rise, whose wife will she be of them? For the seven had her as a wife."
Noun: Nominative Singular Feminine
http://strongsnumbers.com/greek/1135.htm
http://concordance.biblos.com/gune_.htm
So here again, we have to look in what we believe the scripture is talking about, as this word can certainly and is implied at times with being a wife of many years.
It should be noted that both Greek words are also the ones used for both passages in Matthew,
BUT, given the context of this passage is relating to the divorce (which granted remarriage) from Moses (from God) then I can only include this passage at the VERY LEAST includes the meaning of wives in which we know as well as the cheating of such (the wife and husband) as we see on daily bases. Each one can come to their own conclusions, but for me, I can see it no other way.
Because of time (3 hours till alarm clock LOL) I will address the rest of the concerns later on.
God bless you all, and I hope all here are lucky enough to experience life with the wife of their youth. (or later) At the same time, I hope those who have been remarried can find comfort in these scriptures, as well as many more I will point out as time goes forth.
God bless you all, and above all, FOLLOW THE HOLY SPIRIT. 
