Reflective Listening

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marks

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Do you want to actually know what someone else thinks? Someone else's view on things?

Reflective Listening, also called Active Listening, involves setting aside your own comments and opinions for the purpose of learning someone else's ideas.

Instead of reacting, replying with your ideas, repeat back in your own words what someone has said.

So someone says,

"Having your feet shod with the preparation of the Gospel of Peace, I see this referring to living our lives having been prepared by God to do that, because we have peace with God by the Gospel."

And now it's your turn. "No, this is talking about people being sent as missionaries, 'how beautiful on the mountains are the feet of them that bring good news'."

Or . . . a Reflective answer:

"So you're saying, to have your feet shod like this is to be at peace with God so you can give the right gospel message."

You respond with what you think they are saying in your own words. That gives the first speak the opportunity to know if you understood them correctly.

"Yes, it's about being at peace with God, but it's more about being prepared for all of life by having received the Gospel, and having peace with God."

"OK, so your feet shod with the preperation of the Gospel of peace is about being able to have a life based in being at peace with God, how that prepares you for your life."

"Yes, that's what I think."

Speaker 1 makes their statement.
Speaker 2 reflects back that statement.
Speaker 1 either affirms that Speaker 2 is correct, or Speaker 1 offers a correction.
Speaker 2 again reflects back Speaker 1's statement.

This process continues until Speaker 1 answer, Yes, you understand. And then you can both know there is actual understanding.

Then Speaker 2 can respond appropriately with their comment. And Speaker 1 can reflect that back.

You must be patient.
You must be kind.
You must be sincere.

You must be willing to set aside your own reactions and responses in favor of learning from someone else, whether you agree or disagree.

Or it won't work.

I promise you, if you learn this, you will gain tremendously!

Much love!
 
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lforrest

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If you love your neighbor you should be present in your conversations with them. Being present involves paying attention, giving them your time, attention, and energy.

It is possible to learn how to block out annoying people even if you are right there next to them. This would not be pleasing to the Lord I think.
 

marks

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If you love your neighbor you should be present in your conversations with them. Being present involves paying attention, giving them your time, attention, and energy.

It is possible to learn how to block out annoying people even if you are right there next to them. This would not be pleasing to the Lord I think.

Are we hear, only to be heard? I want real engagment with people, and someone who you find annoying is giving you an opportunity to grow. He works All things to our good, but we can cooperate or not, and receive more of His blessing, or not.

Ephesians 4:11-15 KJV
11) And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers;
12) For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ:
13) Till we all come in the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man, unto the measure of the stature of the fulness of Christ:
14) That we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive;
15) But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ:

Where will we find unity if we cannot take the time to understand each other?

Being present, yes, our personal intellectual and emotional investment in another person.

Much love!
 

ScottA

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Do you want to actually know what someone else thinks? Someone else's view on things?

Reflective Listening, also called Active Listening, involves setting aside your own comments and opinions for the purpose of learning someone else's ideas.

Instead of reacting, replying with your ideas, repeat back in your own words what someone has said.

So someone says,

"Having your feet shod with the preparation of the Gospel of Peace, I see this referring to living our lives having been prepared by God to do that, because we have peace with God by the Gospel."

And now it's your turn. "No, this is talking about people being sent as missionaries, 'how beautiful on the mountains are the feet of them that bring good news'."

Or . . . a Reflective answer:

"So you're saying, to have your feet shod like this is to be at peace with God so you can give the right gospel message."

You respond with what you think they are saying in your own words. That gives the first speak the opportunity to know if you understood them correctly.

"Yes, it's about being at peace with God, but it's more about being prepared for all of life by having received the Gospel, and having peace with God."

"OK, so your feet shod with the preperation of the Gospel of peace is about being able to have a life based in being at peace with God, how that prepares you for your life."

"Yes, that's what I think."

Speaker 1 makes their statement.
Speaker 2 reflects back that statement.
Speaker 1 either affirms that Speaker 2 is correct, or Speaker 1 offers a correction.
Speaker 2 again reflects back Speaker 1's statement.

This process continues until Speaker 1 answer, Yes, you understand. And then you can both know there is actual understanding.

Then Speaker 2 can respond appropriately with their comment. And Speaker 1 can reflect that back.

You must be patient.
You must be kind.
You must be sincere.

You must be willing to set aside your own reactions and responses in favor of learning from someone else, whether you agree or disagree.

Or it won't work.

I promise you, if you learn this, you will gain tremendously!

Much love!
So you're saying, we're all far from tremendous and have a lot to learn? ;)
 

ScottA

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Yes, and that if we work together, we can do good things!

Much love!
OK, so if we work together we can do good things, be tremendous, and perhaps learn a lot?
 
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Jay Ross

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If you are not prepared to learn, then you are a poor communicator. You care more for speaking at the person rather than with the person.
 

BarneyFife

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Ok, I don't know what I'm doing, but weigh this:

I am so unholy, that even if I managed to get a zillion times holier (even by God's standards) than any of you folks, we'd still all look pretty much the same to Jesus.

.
 
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Mr E

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Ok, I don't know what I'm doing, but weigh this:

I am so unholy, that even if I managed to get a zillion times holier (even by God's standards) than any of you folks, we'd still all look pretty much the same to Jesus.

.

Filthy rags.

I don't think that it's a matter of us needing to think less of ourselves, but infinitely more of Him.