Need help overcoming this.

Hello Someone,

The following book might be of some help in dealing with the issues you talk about: Neil T. Anderson, 2008. Winning the Battle Within. Realistic Steps to Overcoming Sexual Strongholds, Eugene Oregon, Harvest House Publishers, 213 pages.

The page titled "Doing, but How?" of the English section of my Web site contains information on various aspects of sexuality from a Christian perspective. There are several testimonies by people who have trusted Christ and found help in overcoming various sorts of sexual struggles. One point that comes out in those videos and in the book I mention above is that guilt is counterproductive. What these men and women share can be applied to several other aspects of life.

May God strenghten you...

Someone059.......if I may......... You might find this a little harsh.......but trust me it is the truth.

I know exactly what you are going through just so happens.

Here comes the truth.....anything else than this is a chasing of the wind.

You must ask Christ back into your life and ask for the forgiveness of sins.
If you don't do this then satan will let you think you are trying to get rid of this on your own.
And you will be, without God...he will let you think you are getting help from Christians when
you are not...you are stuck in the same boat so to speak.

You will be riding a merry-go-round the rest of your entire life.

You must come to Christ and let Him fight this battle of yours.

It's up to you and you only....get the power of Jesus and let Him help you.
Without that personal relationship with Christ you have no armor and are vulnerable at all stages.

Now when you do this..and only when you do....will you see how to fight this piece of crap demon messin with ya.

Dear heavenly father keep your hand on someone059 and make him a mighty man of God.

Make him a WARRIOR FOR CHRIST
Maybe I should a little example here......

When I got born again.....26 years ago...you can't shut up about what Jesus had done for me. As ya can see I'm still goin strong

Example;;;;;;I saw some old friends one afternoon that I hadn't seen in a year...friends I use to party with...ya know..drugs, women, alcohol etc.
When I told them about how God delivered me from all that stuff this is what they told me.

"We stopped doing that stuff also....ya know starting to cut back"

Someone059...I'm sure you have heard the old sayin.....Death & Taxes

Well, it's really Heaven or Hell
Ya see........those friends didn't have Jesus, they were trying to quit on their own.
But...they might as well keep on doing that stuff...because in their eyes thier goodness still doesn't get them to heaven.
But hey..they stopped drinking...big deal in Jesus' eyes.

Jesus loves you Someone059........and He stands and waits for His name to be called on by your name.

God Bless!

RANDOR
And all the answers above were really good also

Someone059 said:

I've been addicted to pornography since I was 12. I'm 16 now and still have problems with it. I've told my dad about it two times, my youth pastor once, gone to youth camps time and time again, and still I carry this addiction. I'm too ashamed to tell them again, and I really want help from someone I don't know. When I was 12 I had a good relationship with the Lord, but over the years the relationship deceased. I really want that relationship back, I want to pray more again and read my Bible more again. Every time I want a change in my life, the temptation takes control of me and I go right back to where I started. Pornography isn't the only thing that changed my life, rap did as well. I know it's just music but, it changed me for the worst, for it has bad lyrics which have turned me into a cursing, brat. My friends are the ones that exposed it to me. When we were kids my friends were good and right with the Lord, but we all changed, and now I don't know about them. I really want to turn this life around, away from pornography, away from rap, and I want to have a relationship with the Lord. Honestly, I can't do this alone, I was hoping one of you on these forums with much wisdom and guidance from God could help me.

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My friend this kind of thing takes faith first not action first, everyone has faith naturally we just have to learn to put it in the right place.

Someone, it's not all your fault that you've become a slave to porn. Much of the blame lies squarely on the shoulders of the false prophets filling pulpits every week and telling people that we can't keep the Ten Commandments. Brother, the very fact that you feel Holy Spirit conviction to stop this mental fornication means you are not yet too far gone. But, Jesus will not force you surrender this to Him. Here is how to do it:

As soon as the devil flashes the temptation to indulge in porn, IMMEDIATELY send up a prayer to God for help, for it will become harder and harder to resist the devil with each passing second. Tell Him that you love Him and you do not want to crucify Him afresh with yet another round of sinful indulgence and beg him for strength to resist the devil.

Then by faith believe His promise that He will help all of us who come to Him in the hour of desperation and take hold of that promise by that same faith!

Then resist Satan in the strength of Jesus and CONTINUE to resist him until he flees from you, for there in no temptation without a way of escape that we may be able to bear it. Some people will call this "salvation by works", but don't listen to them, for your eternal soul is at stake. Jesus never forces us to surrender our sin to Him - that is the tactic of Satan.

Here's a little secret: the victory is already yours when you make the choice to deny your lustful passions, for all power necessary from heaven is released into your life to accomplish the obedience that you and I are unable to accomplish on our own (yes, me too). You can overcome as I and others have overcome this wickedness for we are more than a conquerors in Christ Jesus, amen?

A hymn of encouragement for you:

"Yield not to temptation, for YIELDING is sin;
Each vict'ry will help you to some other win;
Fight manly onward, dark passions subdue;
Look ever to Jesus, He will carry you through."

Pornography does change the brain in the same manner as gambling, alcohol, addictive drugs - it really is a matter of discipline. Recognize that you are vulnerable to watching pornography, stop being shocked by your desire for it, and replace the behavior with something else - ideally something active.

Someone059 said:

I've been addicted to pornography since I was 12. I'm 16 now and still have problems with it. I've told my dad about it two times, my youth pastor once, gone to youth camps time and time again, and still I carry this addiction. I'm too ashamed to tell them again, and I really want help from someone I don't know. When I was 12 I had a good relationship with the Lord, but over the years the relationship deceased. I really want that relationship back, I want to pray more again and read my Bible more again. Every time I want a change in my life, the temptation takes control of me and I go right back to where I started. Pornography isn't the only thing that changed my life, rap did as well. I know it's just music but, it changed me for the worst, for it has bad lyrics which have turned me into a cursing, brat. My friends are the ones that exposed it to me. When we were kids my friends were good and right with the Lord, but we all changed, and now I don't know about them. I really want to turn this life around, away from pornography, away from rap, and I want to have a relationship with the Lord. Honestly, I can't do this alone, I was hoping one of you on these forums with much wisdom and guidance from God could help me.

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You are one of these that Jesus speaks of

(Mat 5:6) Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.

Someone059 said:

I want to have a relationship with the Lord. Honestly, I can't do this alone, I was hoping one of you on these forums with much wisdom and guidance from God could help me.

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Jesus Christ is in you and is with you always.

Colossians 1:27 To whom God would make known what is the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles; which is Christ in you, the hope of glory: 28 Whom we preach, warning every man, and teaching every man in all wisdom; that we may present every man perfect in Christ Jesus:

Matthew 28:20 Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.

That means we can live by faith in the Son of God in being our Good Shepherd & rest in all His promises to us to help us to follow Him in casting down wicked imaginations, thinking on good things, and not make any provision for the flesh to fulfill the lust thereof or incite our desires to come forth again to entertain ourselves with.

Galatians 5:24 And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. 25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.

1 John 1:5 This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. 6 If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth: 7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.
James 1:
14 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. 15 Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death. 16 Do not err, my beloved brethren.
1 Corinthians 10:
12 Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall. 13 There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

Romans 13:13 Let us walk honestly, as in the day; not in rioting and drunkenness, not in chambering and wantonness, not in strife and envying. 14 But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof.


1 John 2:15 Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16 For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world. 17 And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.


Hebrews 4:
12 For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. 13 Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do. 14 Seeing then that we have a great high priest, that is passed into the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our profession. 15 For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.

2 Timothy 4:18 And the Lord shall deliver me from every evil work, and will preserve me unto his heavenly kingdom: to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.

Jude 1:
24 Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy, 25 To the only wise God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever. Amen.


Psalm 19:12 Who can understand his errors? cleanse thou me from secret faults. 13 Keep back thy servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me: then shall I be upright, and I shall be innocent from the great transgression. 14 Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.

Well, Satan was a master of music. It's no surprise that he is using the music industry today to destroy souls. Simple solution for you - stop listening.

As for the pornography... there is a demon coming for you. Don't listen to people who tell you to "look, but don't touch." Jesus made it very clear that to look is to commit the sin. It is all about what is happening inside you. There is a spiritual war taking place and I'm not sure if you understand. Several people have quoted you the text, "Resist the devil and he will flee from you." This is the best scripture for your situation. I have experienced the power of God while resisting Satan.

I have been where you are, I have fought what you fight, and I have something to share with you.

Locking your device, or censoring your internet will not work. It is a bandaid on a gaping wound. You have already expressed what this problem has cost you, and allow me to assure you that it will cost even more if not dealt with. Satan has placed pornography at your fingertips for a reason. It invades our homes and floods our screens - all by design. He knows the power it has over the human mind.

Pornography will always find you, as a demon does, but what will your response be? Will you sacrifice your soul?

Pick up your sword and fight; for the battle is real; and the war is here.

Some addictions require professional help. If you cannot just deter yourself from your addiction by yourself, look to see what kind of help is out there. If you cannot afford professional assistance, look into what the local area offers for help. Sometimes just a change of routine can get you on the right track. Try that and see how you do. God Bless.

Someone059.......if I may......... You might find this a little harsh.......but trust me it is the truth.

I know exactly what you are going through just so happens.

Here comes the truth.....anything else than this is a chasing of the wind.

You must ask Christ back into your life and ask for the forgiveness of sins.
If you don't do this then satan will let you think you are trying to get rid of this on your own.
And you will be, without God...he will let you think you are getting help from Christians when
you are not...you are stuck in the same boat so to speak.

You will be riding a merry-go-round the rest of your entire life.

You must come to Christ and let Him fight this battle of yours.

It's up to you and you only....get the power of Jesus and let Him help you.
Without that personal relationship with Christ you have no armor and are vulnerable at all stages.

Now when you do this..and only when you do....will you see how to fight this piece of crap demon messin with ya.

Dear heavenly father keep your hand on someone059 and make him a mighty man of God.

Make him a WARRIOR FOR CHRIST

Maybe I should a little example here......

When I got born again.....26 years ago...you can't shut up about what Jesus had done for me. As ya can see I'm still goin strong

Example;;;;;;I saw some old friends one afternoon that I hadn't seen in a year...friends I use to party with...ya know..drugs, women, alcohol etc.
When I told them about how God delivered me from all that stuff this is what they told me.

"We stopped doing that stuff also....ya know starting to cut back"

Someone059...I'm sure you have heard the old sayin.....Death & Taxes

Well, it's really Heaven or Hell
Ya see........those friends didn't have Jesus, they were trying to quit on their own.
But...they might as well keep on doing that stuff...because in their eyes thier goodness still doesn't get them to heaven.
But hey..they stopped drinking...big deal in Jesus' eyes.

Jesus loves you Someone059........and He stands and waits for His name to be called on by your name.

God Bless!

RANDOR

And all the answers above were really good also

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This hits the nail on the head. It's an inside job. You can take all the external sources of sin away, but if the heart is ignored it will sooner or later rebel and all will be for nothing. I remember years ago sitting in the drivers seat of a VW bus I was living in at the time, my hands tightly gripping the steering wheel. I was literally white knuckling it. Sweating, praying for help, but I what I really wanted desperately was a drink. Eventually, I succumbed and just decided to go get a bottle. Here's where things got weird. The shakes and tremors just seemed to vanish as I decided to go get a bottle. I was trying so hard to resist temptation that the effort itself was what eventually caused me to give up. As I walked towards the liquor store, I suddenly realized that I was no longer struggling to resist getting a drink at all. It was all in my mind; my own thoughts had betrayed me. I just kept on walking for a while without thinking about anything, and eventually just went to bed without getting that bottle.

We're our own worst enemy, and it isn't about giving up those external sources of sin. It's our hearts that are the problem. Jesus points this out in his discussion with the Pharisees(Mark chapter 7). He points out that no amount of external tampering will clean our hearts; we're in an ontological state of defilement. In other words, God has to do it. We have to trust in God to do it for us.

Someone059 said:

I've been addicted to pornography since I was 12. I'm 16 now and still have problems with it. I've told my dad about it two times, my youth pastor once, gone to youth camps time and time again, and still I carry this addiction. I'm too ashamed to tell them again, and I really want help from someone I don't know. When I was 12 I had a good relationship with the Lord, but over the years the relationship deceased. I really want that relationship back, I want to pray more again and read my Bible more again. Every time I want a change in my life, the temptation takes control of me and I go right back to where I started. Pornography isn't the only thing that changed my life, rap did as well. I know it's just music but, it changed me for the worst, for it has bad lyrics which have turned me into a cursing, brat. My friends are the ones that exposed it to me. When we were kids my friends were good and right with the Lord, but we all changed, and now I don't know about them. I really want to turn this life around, away from pornography, away from rap, and I want to have a relationship with the Lord. Honestly, I can't do this alone, I was hoping one of you on these forums with much wisdom and guidance from God could help me.

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If you love Jesus you wouldn't watch porn bc porn watching drives the nails that Jesus took for your sin right back into His hands and feet, according to Hebrews 6. Struggle with porn? Throw out the computer or iPhone and get on your knees and beg God for deliverance. If you don't "cut off" or "pluck out" that which is standing in your way to heaven, you will most certainly not make heaven in the end, friend. Hard to do? Well, Jesus said, "My yoke is EASY and My burden LIGHT." The devil's yoke and burden starts out easy and light but as time goes by they begin to imperceptibly weigh us down and eventually crush the life out of us. When you decide to follow Jesus and stop breaking His commandments through this filthy fornication and adultery, at first His seems to be an IMPOSSIBLE yoke and burden but be assured friend - and I say this with absolute certainty - as time goes by those two will become LESS and LESS heavy and burdensome until finally you will be walking in continued victory over this sin with Jesus' yoke and burden feeling like you are walking on air. It's simply a matter of the will, friend. YOUR will. When the devil comes to you with his yoke and burden of porn, you are POWERLESS to resist him, but if you say as our Savior said, "No my will, but Thy will be done" and make the choice to resist him anyway, power from God is immediately poured into your life to strengthen and equip you to resist Satan and after the period of trial you will cause him to with his temptations flee far from you. Or, you can keep on looking at porn and eventually be lost, friend. Why would any of us exchange heaven for the cheap thrill of sexual indulgence, especially when heaven stands ready to help us as they watch Satan approach us with his temptations?

Hard to do?

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Yes it is, and so many christians walking around feeling guilty because teh worlds chrisians demand they change, something God does in His time not ours. I have yet to meet a sinless Christian and I doubt i will ever meet one before Christ return on heaven whichever comes first. People become new christians and they are told they must stop sinning by the people whos sins are worse than theirs. Guilt its teh devils favourite tool after teh flesh.

I agree with Phoneman777 on this one. Grace is not license to indulge in evil. As Paul says, “Why not say—as we are being slanderously reported as saying and as some claim that we say—“Let us do evil that good may result”? Their condemnation is deserved.” (Romans 3:8, NIV84)

Those who are slaves to sin cannot be slaves to God. Christ came to give us the power to put the sinful flesh to death so we can live renewed lives....not to give us excuses to continue in evil.

Porn and other forms of sexual perversion should not be toyed with. Flee it and do whatever it takes to try to turn from such evil. Ultimately, God will need to transform such a person's heart, but I believe God's grace works in cooperation with us. God fills those who hunger and thirst for righteousness. But those who hunger and thirst for porn and evil should not expect that they will be transformed. God responds to the needy and humble. Consider the blind who cried out to Jesus. Jesus ignored them until they could be ignored no longer. Then they received their request to see. That is the faith God desires. God responds to those who, through passion and persistence, crave him and his righteousness above all other things. Dont expect to give lip-service and continue to indulge the misdeeds of the flesh that God will one day take over your free will. It just doesn't work that way.

Ask, seek and knock...then the door will be opened.

mjrhealth said:

Yes it is, and so many christians walking around feeling guilty because teh worlds chrisians demand they change, something God does in His time not ours. I have yet to meet a sinless Christian and I doubt i will ever meet one before Christ return on heaven whichever comes first. People become new christians and they are told they must stop sinning by the people whos sins are worse than theirs. Guilt its teh devils favourite tool after teh flesh.

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There you go again denying the truth. You should read Wormwood's comments. Jesus commands you to "go and sin no more", but you insist He said "go and cut down on your sinning". Until one exchanges his love of sinful pleasure for a new love for Jesus and His empowerment He gives us to live a holy, pure life, he will continue to cover his sin with pathetic false hope of a false gospel, which says Jesus died for me so that I can keep on doing the things that made necessary His death in the first place.

As a masculine male and veteran of a foreign war, it offends me to no end to hear so called "Christian men" whine about how they can't overcome sin. The same kind of wimps that would cover in fear in the face of danger instead of fighting manfully onward. Thank God the "fearful" will not be in heaven. They deserve in the Day of Judgment the humility of having their cowardly loins spill out all over the place just like Satan cowered in fear for his own existence amidst the chaos when God manifested His might and power during the destruction of the Deluge.

As a masculine male and veteran of a foreign war, it offends me to no end to hear so called "Christian men" whine about how they can't overcome sin.

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Yes and I know lots of christians who love to boast, i have nothing to boast of, but His grace and love for me.

he will continue to cover his sin with pathetic false hope of a false gospel, which says Jesus died for me so that I can keep on doing the things that made necessary His death in the first place

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Well if grace is false hope, again you have just condemned all of mankind to death. So many christians troubled by sin, because christianty tells the Jesus didnt die for all of you sins. just todays. And that is teh greatest lie of all that keeps men in bondage through unbelief.

mjrhealth said:

Yes and I know lots of christians who love to boast, i have nothing to boast of, but His grace and love for me.

Well if grace is false hope, again you have just condemned all of mankind to death. So many christians troubled by sin, because christianty tells the Jesus didnt die for all of you sins. just todays. And that is teh greatest lie of all that keeps men in bondage through unbelief.

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You don't preach "grace", friend. You preach "presumption". Presumption says "I'll keep sinning bc God's grace will cover it" but the wisest man God ever blessed with wisdom says, "He that covereth his sins shall not prosper, but whosoever confesseth and forsaketh his sins shall have mercy."

You do indeed boast, friend - the worst kind of boasting that one can make and you don't even see it. You boast that you have power over God to force Him to cover your presumptuous sins with his grace, when Solomon plainly says God's covering for our sins is predicated on our willingness to turn and forsake them, not repeat them with each new day. The cover for your sins which you possess is not from God, but a cover of your own making. If you continue down this path of false grace, false hope, false mercy, false covering for your sins, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven, friend. Let JESUS cover your sins by first forgiving them and then empowering you to forsake and turn from them. Choose ye this day.

You don't preach "grace", friend. You preach "presumption". Presumption says "I'll keep sinning bc God's grace will cover it" but the wisest man God ever blessed with wisdom says, "He that covereth his sins shall not prosper, but whosoever confesseth and forsaketh his sins shall have mercy."

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Rom_12:3 For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.

YEs i teach grace by faith, you teach works.

Eph_2:8 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:

When one pays for something its no longer a gift, and no longer by faith.

Eph 2:9 Not of works, lest any man should boast.

Rom_9:32 Wherefore? Because they sought it not by faith, but as it were by the works of the law. For they stumbled at that stumblingstone;

Let JESUS cover your sins by first forgiving them and then empowering you to forsake and turn from them. Choose ye this day.

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I did so many years ago, I have even being in teh presence off God, was that by my works no it was because of faith in Christ and putting on His righteousness and not my own.

So you can boast of how good you are, and I ll boast to thew world of how good He is..

And when you stop sinning, please come and tell teh world how you did it, and how it is that you no longer need His greace because you perfected yourself through your own works, snd so therefore Jesus sacrifice is no longer valid for you,

Luk 18:10 Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican.
Luk 18:11 The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican.
Luk 18:12 I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess.
Luk 18:13 And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner.
Luk 18:14 I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.

Whch one are you going to be??

mj,

You are creating a straw man. No one is saying we become perfect or no longer need grace. You continually misrepresent others to make your argument sound better. This is deceptive and unfair. You really need to stop doing this because this is a very dishonest form of rhetoric.

The issue here is does repentance precede grace or does grace precede repentance. I believe the Bible teaches that repentance and humility comes first. God gives grace to the humble and repentant. Repentance does not mean we become perfect or no longer need grace. It does, however, mean that we become serious about living a new life and turning away from words and behaviors that are ungodly and wicked. You should consider that passage of the tax collector and the Pharisee, yourself. The tax collector beat his chest and cried to God for mercy. This is true repentance. The Pharisee felt he didn't need to change and that he was okay with God just how he was. Phoneman and I are arguing that a person needs to be like the tax collector who cries out to God humbly and desires with all their heart to turn from their sin. These are the ones who receive grace and help in their time of need. Those who feel they can continue in sin and do not weep or mourn over their sin should not expect they will receive grace. They are like the Pharisee who thinks they are just fine because they are "favored" by God.