Remarriage after a divorce.

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LightRays

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Good Day. Could you please assist with the following. I need some guidance regarding remarriage after a divorce. Most churches will marry previously divorced couples (myself included). Could anyone refer me to some scripture regarding this. There are lots of scripture about divorce, but not allowing remarriage. I would really appreciate some input. Regards.
 

Born_Again

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I'll have to do some research but I think most of the scripture against being remarried is for the woman. However, I may be thinking Old Testament.... I'll do a little research and get back to you. I may need to know the answer to this myself . LOL

Yea, it looks similar in the NT. Matthew 5:31-32. I'll look a little deeper and get back to you.

1 Corinthians 7 is exactly what you are looking for!!
 

Angelina

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Good Day. Could you please assist with the following. I need some guidance regarding remarriage after a divorce. Most churches will marry previously divorced couples (myself included). Could anyone refer me to some scripture regarding this. There are lots of scripture about divorce, but not allowing remarriage. I would really appreciate some input. Regards.
1 Corinthians 7
10 Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.

Sorry bro...you can remarry your wife [as long as she has remained chaste] but there is nothing in scripture that says that a man or woman can remarry unless their partner dies.
 

Wormwood

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I think the Bible does give valid reasons for remarriage. For instance, if a spouse is unfaithful and divorce occurs as a result or the partner is an unbeliever and abandons the marriage. There are other issues that make me wonder that the Bible does not specifically address (for instance, what if the husband is horribly abusive to the wife or children?). Ultimately, I think God's desire is that couples not divorce, and if a divorce does take place for an unbiblical reason, it is best for the couple to work to come back together rather than remarry. We should not take our vows to God lightly. However, every situation is unique and there are no cookie-cutter answers. I would encourage you to sit down with a trusted pastor to work through the specifics of your situation.
 

Angelina

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Greetings brother :)

I think the Bible does give valid reasons for remarriage. For instance, if a spouse is unfaithful and divorce occurs as a result or the partner is an unbeliever and abandons the marriage.
Unfaithfulness or having an unbelieving spouse does not constitute remarriage. It only gives reason for divorce...

There are other issues that make me wonder that the Bible does not specifically address (for instance, what if the husband is horribly abusive to the wife or children?).
I can totally agree with the above comment but again...it only really centers around reasons for divorce. Marriage is a covenant made before God and I agree...it is definitely not something that should be taken lightly. The Pharisees discussed this with Jesus who said...

Matthew19
3 The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?”
4 And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

7 They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?”

8 He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality,and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”

10 His disciples said to Him, “If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.”

11 But He said to them, “All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given

Divorce may hold biblical validity but remarriage does not...JMHO :huh:

Shalom!!!
 

Wormwood

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Angelina,

Can you show me Scripturally where a person who has undergone a legitimate divorce would be prohibited from remarriage? It would seem to me that the very concept of a legitimate divorce would be that God understands the covenant between the two people to be dissolved. I do not see that the death of a spouse which would nullify the covenant or the adultery or abandonment of a spouse are so different here. Especially in the first century where women were often dependant upon the husband both socially and economically. I don't think the Bible is teaching here that if an unbelieving husband abandons his spouse to go marry another woman...that the woman is mandated to be socially and economically destitute due to the sin of her unbelieving spouse.
 

Angelina

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Can you show me Scripturally where a person who has undergone a legitimate divorce would be prohibited from remarriage?
likewise dear brother - can you show me in scripture where one has been legitimately divorced and remarried? :huh:

I don't think the Bible is teaching here that if an unbelieving husband abandons his spouse to go marry another woman...that the woman is mandated to be socially and economically destitute due to the sin of her unbelieving spouse
.
1 Corinthians 7
12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. 15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?

...again Paul is speaking of the unbeliever departing from his marriage responsibilities. This does not constitute remarriage but rather divorcing an unbeliever...
 

Wormwood

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Angelina,

It just seems to me that the very concept and nature of divorce was the dissolving of a covenant agreement between a woman and man. If this is a biblically legitimite divorce, it would seem that the very nature of the concept means the person is "not under bondage" to that covenant any longer. I dont think the Bible needs to prove that remarriage is a possibility after divorce since the very purpose of divorce is to remove the person from the confines of that covenant. It would be like arguing that a person needs biblical support to remarry after someone dies. It was simply understood. Jewish men would often divorce their wives for "any reason" in order to remarry someone else.

In sum, a "legitimate" divorce is one that gives genuine, biblical reasons for abolishing the covenant between a man and woman that made them "one flesh." Thus, if this covenant is broken and the two are no longer one, then there is no legitimate reason why that person should not be able to remarry. Jesus condems divorce "for any reason" because many of the divorces were not legitimate and therefore men were marrying women who were still viewed to be "one flesh" with another.
 

Angelina

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I dont think the Bible needs to prove that remarriage is a possibility after divorce since the very purpose of divorce is to remove the person from the confines of that covenant. It would be like arguing that a person needs biblical support to remarry after someone dies. It was simply understood. Jewish men would often divorce their wives for "any reason" in order to remarry someone else.
To be honest brother, the bible only supports the idea of remarriage after someone dies. The bible tells us that God hates divorce Malachi 2:16 but Moses permitted it because of the hardness of man's heart.Matthew 19:8. Jesus explains that from the beginning this was not the case.

Sorry bro I have workers here at the moment and I can't concentrate properly...I will get back to you soon...[trying to get some sleep before work but these guys are using their chainsaws outside my bedroom] Grrrrrr... :angry:
 
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Wormwood

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Angelina,

Thanks for getting back with me. I hope you get some rest :). I agree that divorce is a bad thing and not what God intends. However, the Bible does make provision for divorce under some circumstances. So what is divorce? Divorce is an act that renders one who was married as though they are now single and separated from that marriage covenant that unified the two. Of course, if the divorce is illegitimate, the two are still one in the eyes of God. However, if God does approve of the divorce due to abandonment, unfaithfulness or whatever, then the two are no longer one. For this is what divorce means. Thus, if the two are no longer one, then I see no biblical evidence to support the idea that future marriage is prohibited. Why would it be? It is only prohibited if the person is still united to another in God's eyes because he deems their divorce illegitimate and has not released them from their vows.

It seems to me that you are making an argument from silence. To say that the Bible does not support something, therefore, it must be condemned is an attempt to speak where God has not spoken. Rather, as I have said, the very notion of divorce implies that the person is "not under bondage" to the prior covenant. What else could this mean other than the person is "free" to marry again...just as someone is "not under bondage" to their marriage covenant if their spouse dies (which is the illustration Paul uses in Romans 7 which suggests that we have died to the law and are therefore "free" to marry another). One is not free to engage in a covenant with another if they are already in a covenant. However, if there is no covenant, there is freedom to begin one.
 

LightRays

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Thank you so much for the replies. I was looking for the scripture in Corinthians so now I can also go and do some more study on this.

I got divorced many years ago due to "unfaithfulness" and got married again after 6 years. We were only married for 10 years when my husband passed away.
 

Wormwood

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1 Corinthians 7 deals with marriage in some various ways, divorce being one of them.
 

aspen

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I think divorce is spoken against in the Bible when you leave a spouse for another person.
 

Enquirer

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Jesus said you cannot remarry after divorce ... True or False ?


But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a
divorced woman commits adultery. Matt 5:32

It is crucial to understand this verse.

In the first portion of this verse, Jesus is saying that the only acceptable “legal tender” for divorce would be if your partner commits adultery.
This divorce is now considered to be legally and acceptably annulled in the sight of God, even though He “hates divorce” (Malachi).

The second portion of this verse speaks of the legality and validity of an acceptable or unacceptable remarriage.

However, the above verse translation is incorrect ... because it implies that "whoever marries "a" divorced woman (man) commits adultery" but the
Greek does not say "a" (as in any) woman (or man) it says ... ἀπολελυμένην ... correctly translated ... "her having been divorced".
Who is the "her" ?
The very same woman from the beginning portion of the verse who committed the act of adultery, the very same woman of whom Jesus himself said
that this was the only legal and valid reason you could divorce her because of her adultery, that's who.

The incorrect translation of this verse has had many a preacher say that Jesus said “a divorced person cannot get remarried because it is committing
adultery”.
But He didn’t say that ... He was speaking about the same person who was divorced because of their adultery.

Due to this mistranslation a total prohibition has been put on remarriage after divorce and declares it as “committing adultery” as a whole.
Correctly translated the prohibition is only upon the offending party and his/her new spouse.
 

LightRays

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I also understood it as Enquirer put it. An interesting verse is also 1 Corinthians 7;15 " but if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace"

A little bit of humour if I read this correctly: The last half of verse 28: "But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this."

Wishing you a lovely week.
 

Born_Again

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In all honesty, I'm not sure I would get married again if my wife and I get divorced. This has been too painful. But with me being a believer and her not so much, is that saying I can divorce her without breaking his command? It's starting to look tempting. I can only be run over by her so many times.
 

LightRays

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No no no Please try and work things out and please pray about it as well. Please I only quoted it and did not mean to put ideas out there. God still does not like divorce.
 

Wormwood

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Born_Again,

No, Paul specifically says that the believer should not leave their spouse. If the unbeliever leaves, the Scripture says that there is freedom for the believer and they are not bound by what the unbeliever does. I think this was specifically an issue for someone who became a believer and their spouse was a pagan and would abandon the believer because their new-found faith. Paul says, Believer, don't abandon your unbelieving spouse because of your new faith. Your faith can make a difference in their life and the life of your children. However, if they abandon you, that is a different story.
 

Born_Again

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Wormwood said:
Born_Again,

No, Paul specifically says that the believer should not leave their spouse. If the unbeliever leaves, the Scripture says that there is freedom for the believer and they are not bound by what the unbeliever does. I think this was specifically an issue for someone who became a believer and their spouse was a pagan and would abandon the believer because their new-found faith. Paul says, Believer, don't abandon your unbelieving spouse because of your new faith. Your faith can make a difference in their life and the life of your children. However, if they abandon you, that is a different story.
She has said she wants out and she is done with everything. Life to be more exact. She doesn't have faith in anything other than her phone and new tablet!!! I understand that is her escape but man, 24/7. Its just very stressful for me to see 12 years go to waste.... Especially when it can be saved. I will hang in there and wait on the Lord.... Its just difficult...
 

Wormwood

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I am very sorry to hear about that. I think the most important thing for you (although I know its easier said than done) is to pray that your heart does not become hardened toward her. Christ calls us to love our enemies...and sometimes those who wear the label "enemy" can be someone under the same roof. Obviously, if she leaves you, then there is not much you can do about that...other than pray for her. I would just be careful about making her want to leave you subconsciously because things are difficult. I will pray for you that God will help you to know His love for your wife and allow you to love in ways that are beyond your natural self. Perhaps, in this way, she might come to know Christ and his love in her own life.

Be blessed.