I'm very confused

followerofchrist · Jan 14, 2008

Well I was starting to get over the fact that my friends were doing this and I have stopped blaming myself for their choices. But last night I sat down and talked with my sister (unfortunately not something I do very often) and we got on the topic of drinking and drugs...both of my little sisters are involved in these things as well

. I wasn't ready for this! I had a small suspicion the oldest one might be but I had no reason to be sure. I...I don't even know what to say!! They are to young for this, one is still in MIDDLE SCHOOL and the other is in her first year of highschool. I take this one much more personal than i do with my friends. I thought I would have had more of an impact on my little sisters than on my friends. I mean even if I haven't had any effect on them...HOW can they do this? They have seen first hand what it has done to their mom! I am really at a loss, I was getting over this with my friends than I get blind sided by this from my little sisters! I don't know how I can be normal around them anymore, everytime I see them I will be thinking about this. I really don't know with this one, I hate to admit it but I am closer to my friends than I am with my sisters so helping them will be ALOT harder! And they don't really respect my opinion on this b/c they think I am really weird because I never do this stuff, and distance myself from it. One of them even tried to justify what they were doing by saying that Jesus drank wine...can you believe that!?!! It just blows my mind! Again I would REALLY appreciate prayer from you guys, prayer for my sisters and for me so that I can help them!~follower

followerofchrist · Jan 14, 2008

And before my sister told me all this, she made me promise I wouldn't tell are parents. I don't want to lye and break my promise but I feel a little guilty in not telling them. But on the otherhand I think lifting up my sisters to God in my prayers is more than anyone on earth could do for them. Do yall agree?

followerofchrist · Jan 19, 2008

I have talked with one of my friends and he doensn't really know what the right move is either.

Thunder1 · Jan 19, 2008

You and your sisters are in my prayers. If I was in your situation, I would tell my parents, but the choice is yours. I pray for you.God Bless,Thunder1

His By Grace · Jan 19, 2008

I am going to pray with you right now. Father, in Jesus name, I come against this sin of satan! I ask you to deliver these girls from this atmosphere of drinking and bad influences. I ask for a Holy realm of Your Angels to be dispersed to protect them as we are agreeing on this right now. I know that Jesus ever liveth to make intercession on our behalf before you, Father, for your Word says that. I know You never lie to us. I know you are with followerofchrist as we speak. I also know that satan must go through you to get to him because he belongs to you. You hear him and will answer him with your perfect timing. Please send him comfort and let him know that his witness is effective. Help him not to let go of you and to call those things that are not as though they were. I agree with him on behalf of his sisters for deliverance and salvation. May your rod and your staff be felt upon him. May he be lead by your still waters. May your mercies be renewed to him each morning for you tell us they are. Great is your faithfulness! Draw him to your Word and give him scriptures of comfort. May we as believers comfort him with the comfort we ourselves have recieved from other believers and you, Oh, Lord. We are NOT giving up! No power can come against you and prevail! In Jesus' precious and beautiful name-Amen!

followerofchrist · Jan 19, 2008

(Thunder1;31717)
You and your sisters are in my prayers. If I was in your situation, I would tell my parents, but the choice is yours. I pray for you.God Bless,Thunder1
I know, but then I would be breaking my promise.

LeanneK · Jan 19, 2008

Having been where your friends are 'followeofChrist' (before i accepted Jesus Christ as my Saviour) and then returning to my own vomit 7 years later ( backslidden) i do understand. I was four years backslidden and in those four years i was involved in worse things than when i was not a Chrisitian. I was like the prodigal and had to come to the end of myself and when i turned Jesus 'touched' me again in a miraculous way and i I have remained close to Him for over 15 years. Drugs, alcohol and all the other things that so entangle us are just symptoms but the real cause is that i have not a real living daily relationship with the Lord Jesus. Until that happens and He becomes my all in all it matters little what symptom (sin) keeps me away from Him. All it does is just numbs not only our conscience but us spiritually and we don't even realise how far we have fallen. When i returned to the Lord i tried to help my 'christian' friends but all to no avail. Oh i was so convinced that God wanted me to do this. In the years that have followed i hear from time to time that most are still gripped by drugs. In trusting in Him i have long ago moved on and been on a marvellous journey meeting thousands of God's people and yes spending times also in the wilderness and alone. Trust Him for He knows you and your situation and while there may be tests and trials now, He will guide you in the way. Being an older woman now, i can say to you have patience, lay all before the Lord and He will guide you more and more into His purpose for you. His purpose was/is always to have companions so He will not leave you without other Chrisitians to fellowship with. Use this time to pour out your heart to Him and be so close to Him that you can hear His heartbeat and only His voice 'followerofChrist'.

Thunder1 · Jan 20, 2008

(His By Grace;31721)
I am going to pray with you right now. Father, in Jesus name, I come against this sin of satan! I ask you to deliver these girls from this atmosphere of drinking and bad influences. I ask for a Holy realm of Your Angels to be dispersed to protect them as we are agreeing on this right now. I know that Jesus ever liveth to make intercession on our behalf before you, Father, for your Word says that. I know You never lie to us. I know you are with followerofchrist as we speak. I also know that satan must go through you to get to him because he belongs to you. You hear him and will answer him with your perfect timing. Please send him comfort and let him know that his witness is effective. Help him not to let go of you and to call those things that are not as though they were. I agree with him on behalf of his sisters for deliverance and salvation. May your rod and your staff be felt upon him. May he be lead by your still waters. May your mercies be renewed to him each morning for you tell us they are. Great is your faithfulness! Draw him to your Word and give him scriptures of comfort. May we as believers comfort him with the comfort we ourselves have recieved from other believers and you, Oh, Lord. We are NOT giving up! No power can come against you and prevail! In Jesus' precious and beautiful name-Amen!
We are agreeing together in Jesus name !

Thunder1 · Jan 20, 2008

Stand on your holy ground with Jesus. You might get attacks, but be strong !Don't compromise, be bold in Jesus name. You've got the authority over darkness, because of Jesus. You are a great soldier in God's Kingdom. You don't need to please others, only God. You are fighting a good fight in Jesus name. Yeah, most times we have to learn the truth hard way. I thank God you are saved, followerofChrist. Love,Thunder1

Job one · Jan 20, 2008

Dear followerofchrist,After reviewing the posts, it looks like you hav e been given some great advice.Making the right choice is not always easy for many. Some never get the real picture that broad is the gate and wide is the path that leads to destruction and many there be that go in there at.Finding really true friends that sustain one another in their choices to avoid evil is rare and priceless. Continue seeking for those where possible. For some to find such a friend is almost impossible. Friends may let us down, but God will sustain us through adversity and affliction and never abandon us. He will, however allow us to be tried with temptations and afflictions, which I testify can and will test our faith and integrity to the limit at times. If we endure those things and stay close to hime faithfully we will come off victorious.How do you think Noah, that scripture states was a just and perfect man in his generation, must have felt as he saw friends and neighbors make choices to commit evil acts and thoughts continually? His was a very lonely position.How about the three young Israelites who stood singularly against the kings decree and who would not break the ten commandments nor eat of the kings food and were literally tested in the furnace? How about Joseph who was sold into Egypt? He was stuck in a heathen land far from home and loving parents. he was faced with incredible daily temptations, yet exercised his God given power of agency and fled and "got himself out" and away from his adulterous masters wife. What a mighty example he has set for all of us!Examine carefully all that Job endured faithfully. We see that in spite of all that he endured, that in the end, he by his faithfulness was blessed with even greater blessings.Daniel's faith was certainly tested to the limit in the great account of his life.While all the men of Israel made bad choices and trembled and feared the giant, there was only one young boy in all Israel, David, who stepped forward as one who replaced doubt and fear with faith and courage, to face and slay the Goliath of his day. Each of us must learn to be totally faithful and likewise immovable and steadfast in keeping His commandments and in being able to slay the "Goliath's" of our day.Some of the greatest events in Christ's life were those which he endured alone! He was hated, spat upon, ridiculed, reviled, tempted, taunted, beaten, tortured, smitten, humiliated and finally crucified. Even in the event of His crucifixion it was necessary for the Father to painfully leave him alone to endure the final agony that would would allow the final fulfillment of his greatest gift to us.Yes my friend, I understand better than you know, what you are going through. I personally know the loneliness you feel. Yes I understand how you may need to, in many cases, painfully distance yourself from those friends. For in those lonely hours, days or years of loneliness we can find a silver lining and make that powerful choice to either abandon our faith and join them in their wickedness or to come ever more powerfully unto Christ and his love. Always remember "wickedness never was happiness"!

followerofchrist · Jan 20, 2008

(Job one;31768)
Dear followerofchrist,After reviewing the posts, it looks like you hav e been given some great advice.Making the right choice is not always easy for many. Some never get the real picture that broad is the gate and wide is the path that leads to destruction and many there be that go in there at.Finding really true friends that sustain one another in their choices to avoid evil is rare and priceless. Continue seeking for those where possible. For some to find such a friend is almost impossible. Friends may let us down, but God will sustain us through adversity and affliction and never abandon us. He will, however allow us to be tried with temptations and afflictions, which I testify can and will test our faith and integrity to the limit at times. If we endure those things and stay close to hime faithfully we will come off victorious.How do you think Noah, that scripture states was a just and perfect man in his generation, must have felt as he saw friends and neighbors make choices to commit evil acts and thoughts continually? His was a very lonely position.How about the three young Israelites who stood singularly against the kings decree and who would not break the ten commandments nor eat of the kings food and were literally tested in the furnace? How about Joseph who was sold into Egypt? He was stuck in a heathen land far from home and loving parents. he was faced with incredible daily temptations, yet exercised his God given power of agency and fled and "got himself out" and away from his adulterous masters wife. What a mighty example he has set for all of us!Examine carefully all that Job endured faithfully. We see that in spite of all that he endured, that in the end, he by his faithfulness was blessed with even greater blessings.Daniel's faith was certainly tested to the limit in the great account of his life.While all the men of Israel made bad choices and trembled and feared the giant, there was only one young boy in all Israel, David, who stepped forward as one who replaced doubt and fear with faith and courage, to face and slay the Goliath of his day. Each of us must learn to be totally faithful and likewise immovable and steadfast in keeping His commandments and in being able to slay the "Goliath's" of our day.Some of the greatest events in Christ's life were those which he endured alone! He was hated, spat upon, ridiculed, reviled, tempted, taunted, beaten, tortured, smitten, humiliated and finally crucified. Even in the event of His crucifixion it was necessary for the Father to painfully leave him alone to endure the final agony that would would allow the final fulfillment of his greatest gift to us.Yes my friend, I understand better than you know, what you are going through. I personally know the loneliness you feel. Yes I understand how you may need to, in many cases, painfully distance yourself from those friends. For in those lonely hours, days or years of loneliness we can find a silver lining and make that powerful choice to either abandon our faith and join them in their wickedness or to come ever more powerfully unto Christ and his love. Always remember "wickedness never was happiness"!
Thankyou! That really helped me alot! :blessyou:

His By Grace · Jan 21, 2008

That was a very moving post, Job One. I could "hear" the hurt you've experienced in the tone of your words. It helps to know there are Christians all over the world that truly have walked in your shoes. We need to stand strong together. I loved your last line. You are so right. Wickedness never does bring happiness; maybe for a moment. Satan always dresses up evil in a pretty package; otherwise who would be tempted? He is so sly. He never makes it look unattractive. But, sin takes you farther than you want to go, keeps you longer than you want to stay, and costs you more than you want to pay!

ForYou · May 14, 2008

(followerofchrist;30036)
Well yesterday was my first day to school back from my christmas break, I heard what everyone did over the break. And I knew some of my friends went to party's and drank and some even smoked but I was never even tempted to join them and found it much easier just to skip those kind of hang outs. But from what I have heard over the past two days it seems everyone was out drinking almost every night, and to my suprise they were also doing drugs. And I will NOT allow my self to be around this kind of thing because it is sinful and I just can't stand to see my friends, the people I have grown up with the past 16 yrs, act like that! I don't want to stop hanging out with them because they are all my friends and the only people I hang out with but its got to the point that this is the only kind of thing they do so that gives me little time to hang with them. I don't want to just drop them all as friends completely but if this continues I don't see anyother option. Now the obvious answer would seem to me was go to my church and find kids my age their to hang out with but all my friends that have this sinful behavior go to church every week so they ARE the kids at church. So I don't really know what I need but I just need prayer! And if anyone has any advice I would greatly appreciate it! ~follower
I would not stoop to the point of crushing them out of your life. That may seem right,and it sort of is but it makes it very hard. I believe you should still be friends with them. tell them how much this is hurting you. You don't want them to fall. Now I am going to post my prayer! God would you not only help Justin with everything he is coping with,but with his friends,Let them realize that smoking weed,doing drugs is not the right way. You said there is one way God.That one way does not invlovle that,use justin to be these kids personal missionary,let him spread your word to them,so they to can be saved and out of this sin! God just touch their hearts and heal them,I don't know why they are doing them,maybe because they think it is cool,or just because something is going wrong in their life,I don't want them to end up as i have. I don't want them to get to a point where they do it all the time and have problems. God just whatever is going on with these kids making them smoke heal them,I know what your presence can do God and I know you can change these kids lives. Let Justin stay away from the temptation and let him realize that through you anything is possible God. Maybe he doesn't need to tell them about you yet,maybe they already know. Just let him be a friend who in the end helps them. God thanks for everything and just help Justin,and these boys/girls!

followerofchrist · May 14, 2008

Thanks for the prayer Duke

Lunar · May 16, 2008

Hopefully I'm not out of line in suggesting this as a non-Christian, but if you think that what your friends are doing is wrong (and if they are doing it to excess, I agree that it probably is destructive) then the last thing that they need is for you to abandon them as friends.I am sure you have the conviction to not have their habits rub off on you. With that said, you should think about trying to help them in whatever way you can. I wouldn't try and preach to them and tell them to stop doing drugs all the time (out of curiosity, do you know what drugs they were doing?), but I think you can be a positive influence by association.You've got an opportunity to help people that were close to you. I wouldn't ignore it just because you see yourself as being too good for them. Find things to do with them that don't involve drugs and alcohol - heck, summer's coming up. Ask them to go swimming or see a movie or something!Speaking from the standpoint of a non-Christian who uses alcohol and marijuana in moderation, the last thing you want to do is to straight-up tell them that what they're doing is evil, because they just won't be receptive to speech like that, and it will only alienate you from them further. The best thing you can do for someone that you think is overindulging in drugs and alcohol to a destructive extent is to be the sober part of their life. If they have fun around you when they're not under the influence, they'll probably spend less time under the influence. I used to smoke a lot more than I do now; then I discovered I can have plenty of fun just hanging out, drawing, playing video games, etc. You can achieve the same goal with them.If you think one of them is actually an alcoholic or drug addict, though, I'd try and get them some more tangible help.

followerofchrist · May 16, 2008

(Lunar;49491)
Hopefully I'm not out of line in suggesting this as a non-Christian, but if you think that what your friends are doing is wrong (and if they are doing it to excess, I agree that it probably is destructive) then the last thing that they need is for you to abandon them as friends.I am sure you have the conviction to not have their habits rub off on you. With that said, you should think about trying to help them in whatever way you can. I wouldn't try and preach to them and tell them to stop doing drugs all the time (out of curiosity, do you know what drugs they were doing?), but I think you can be a positive influence by association.You've got an opportunity to help people that were close to you. I wouldn't ignore it just because you see yourself as being too good for them. Find things to do with them that don't involve drugs and alcohol - heck, summer's coming up. Ask them to go swimming or see a movie or something!Speaking from the standpoint of a non-Christian who uses alcohol and marijuana in moderation, the last thing you want to do is to straight-up tell them that what they're doing is evil, because they just won't be receptive to speech like that, and it will only alienate you from them further. The best thing you can do for someone that you think is overindulging in drugs and alcohol to a destructive extent is to be the sober part of their life. If they have fun around you when they're not under the influence, they'll probably spend less time under the influence. I used to smoke a lot more than I do now; then I discovered I can have plenty of fun just hanging out, drawing, playing video games, etc. You can achieve the same goal with them.If you think one of them is actually an alcoholic or drug addict, though, I'd try and get them some more tangible help.
I really wish that would work. I do invite them to hang out, even if it is just to see a movie or something. But last time any of them agreed to see a movie he showed up to the theater totally high! And I don't jump in their face and tell them they are bad people for doing this stuff. In fact I am quite subtle with it. But everytime it comes up they just say they are doing nothing wrong.I know they smoke marijuana, but I don't know anything else for sure. They talk about acid alot...I don't know if they use it though.

Letsgofishing · May 17, 2008

Follower of Christ, lead by example. Tell them you don't use marijuanna, tell them they shouldn't use marijuanna, If you ever start using the drug in front of you, or hanging around with people using the dream using the drug, get away ect.Human nature/ or God will lead them to want to be free one day follower of Christ, and when that happens guess who they will go to. You.I'll be praying for you.

followerofchrist · May 17, 2008

Oh they are VERY aware that I don't do any of this and that I don't like that they do it either.

Lunar · May 18, 2008

(Letsgofishing;49586)
Tell them you don't use marijuanna, tell them they shouldn't use marijuanna, If you ever start using the drug in front of you, or hanging around with people using the dream using the drug, get away ect.
I have to recommend against this advice. If you straight up tell them that they shouldn't use marijuana, they won't listen and all you will do is alienate yourself from them. You need to be more subtle if you want to help them.

I'm very confused

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