Divorce and Remarriage

Soverign Grace · May 4, 2019

Waiting on him said:
Count it all joy SG

I'm trying

Thanks for the Scriptural reminder of how to handle trouble. It's funny: I know the verses but at times they don't come to mind; other times they do. But sometimes another believer will say a verse that ministers to you. I appreciate you bringing it to mind. I think God may be speaking to me that way. I don't count it joy or look at trouble that way but maybe that is what God is calling me to do. I know the verse but never really practiced it.

"A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word spoken in due season, how good is it!" - Proverbs 15:23

stunnedbygrace · May 4, 2019

And don't discount that a rereading of everyone's answers may gain you something you've missed. That's always a possibility when we are emotional - to miss some things said.

Soverign Grace · May 5, 2019

stunnedbygrace said:
And don't discount that a rereading of everyone's answers may gain you something you've missed. That's always a possibility when we are emotional - to miss some things said.

That's true - I often miss posts.

Kermos · May 5, 2019

stunnedbygrace said:
He will use unreasonable people to work even the smallest amount of humility into us and to grow our trust.

According to your logic (which is not logic), your words convey "going back to the letter" to Sovereign Grace when you write "trust" as in trust God, and you equeate trust with faith in your post #133 on page 7, so at this point you contradict yourself because you wrote the words of Jesus "equate to going back to the letter" in your post #191 on page 10 of this thread. In your post #191, you tell people that abiding the words of Lord Jesus is "going back to the letter". Lord Jesus has something to say about faith/belief:

"believe in God, and believe in Me." (John 14:1)

You say trust and faith are the same thing then you leverage the words of Lord Jesus, but in your post #191 discount the words of Lord Jesus! Lord Jesus has something to say to hypocrites:

"Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted. But woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, because you shut off the kingdom of heaven from people; for you do not enter in yourselves, nor do you allow those who are entering to go in." (Matthew 23:12-13)

Kermos · May 5, 2019

stunnedbygrace said:
It does equate to going back to the letter, which is for the flesh. And its backwards and will solve nothing, because its cleaning the outside of the cup when its the inside of the cup that the problem stems from.

If a man has internal bleeding, putting a bandaid on the outside is ridiculous and will only lull him into thinking he's okay when he has an unseen mortal bleed going on.

Do you know what we call a doctor who does such an atrocious thing and causes a man to bleed out while telling him he is saving him? A "quack."

Do you know what we call that doctor who does such an atrocious thing of ignoring some of the writings in his medical book thus resulting in the man bleeding to death? An evil murderer. I'm just extending the example that you started.

You directly contradict the very writings of the Apostle John and the Apostle Matthew recording the words of Lord Jesus Christ in the first four citations of "Lord Jesus Christ Declares His Authoritative Word Post (in this thread)"; moreover, by extension, your argument attempts to negate the balance of the citations. To contradict Jesus Christ is antichrist. It is like that doctor.

You did not write "Oh, I'm sorry, Lord Jesus knows best". Instead you ascribe to the words of Jesus "equate to going back to the letter" as well as "for the flesh" in continued opposition to the immeasurable value of the King Jesus's words - SHAME ON YOU - such arrogance! Licentiousness and arrogance go hand in hand. Humility acknowledges the Lordship of Jesus Christ, the Son of God! Humility affirms the value of the Word of God! "Blessed are the humble, for they shall inherit the earth" says Christ Jesus the Lord (Matthew 5:5).

he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law. (Romans 13:8)

Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in strife and jealousy (Romans 13:13)

There is much divorce and remarriage within the church, and the unsaved blaspheme for they see the hypocrisy. A believer loving his/her neighbor will not remarry because the Lord Jesus says. In not remarrying, the believer does not introduce an occasion for stumbling by the neighbor.

As for the saved, our Lord Jesus has something to say about an evil person causing ones who believe in Him to stumble:

"whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea." (Matthew 18:6)

So, stunnedbygrace, it would be unwise for you to continue contradicting the words of Lord Jesus Christ, for this Jesus says:

"He who rejects Me and does not receive My sayings, has one who judges him; the word I spoke is what will judge him at the last day."

Kermos · May 5, 2019

Soverign Grace said:
Yes it confused me at first. After I spoke with the lawyer he confirmed that we were not at fault. He said we were 100% in the right, that we were supervising the dog. He said if anything, the neighbor was at fault. It made me angry that she was condemning us and accepted no responsibility. My husband said "You think we're responsible for this entire bill even though your cat was in our yard." And she said "Yes. You can't keep a cat in your yard." It was ridiculous. So we're at fault and are bound to pay her cat's vet bills because she can't keep her cat in her yard? And we are to incur her vet bills merely for walking a dog in our own yard? I would have felt ashamed of myself if our pet was in their yard and their dog attacked it. I would accept blame because the pet was in their yard. $1500 is a lot of money - at least for me. I had to work very hard for any money I ever got.

She said they "didn't sign a complaint based on my husband's agreement to pay the vet bills." It was very prideful and manipulative and I don't like being manipulated; that's like a Jezebel. Then she said that they "allowed us to remove the dog from the premises and didn't have the court have him euthanized as a favor to us and tried quoting the law - because her husband was a lawyer. It really struck me wrong. She elevated herself to the place of judge, jury, and executioners, and claimed she was the victim - even though their cat was trespassing and my husband walked the dog in our own yard. The cat sliced the dogs face and he bled a big puddle in our room. We chose not to take him to the vets ($$$) but we could have run up a bill and handed it to them. It was utterly ridiculous. My husband thinks she gave the vet carte blanche because she didn't think she had to pay it. Believe me - I watch every penny because if it was me, I would be hovering over that vet to ensure he didn't overcharge me. The neighbor exercised no such oversight because she thought that we were paying the bill.

They both get nice public pensions. They are financially better off than we are. We were on one salary for awhile and I worked when I shouldn't have - I cried on the way to work and cried on the way home because I was in so much pain; but the bills keep coming. It's not like they're hurting for money which is why I can't understand her. Why is she trying to get us to pay her cat's vet bills? I think it's really pushy and wrong. I just don't know if it glorifies God to go along with a lie that WE are the ones at fault. I would be, in essence, going along with a lie. It would feed their pride too as "the wronged ones." If we enforce their delusion by giving in to their demands than we're going along with their lie that WE are at fault, and we just have to accept her explanation that "they can't keep their cat in their yard." It would also feed their pride that they hold the power of life and death over the dog so we'd better pay their cat's vet bills or they may seek to have the dog euthanized." My husband got annoyed and said let them take it to court. But he's more of a politicker than me and he would have paid half the bill. It takes a lot to get him angry but he pushes back if he's pushed too far. That's pretty sick of the neighbor to threaten that. And it's pretty sick and manipulative to try to convince us that they are the ones in the right because they know the law. It's pure manipulation and I've dealt with manipulators - my ex-family and others.

Show me a dog who doesn't chase a cat. She's trying to say the dog is vicious. My husband drove halfway across the country to give our relative the dog because the neighbors demanded that we get him out of the neighborhood. Most people would have told them to go pound sand. We handled it in a Christian manner, understanding that they were upset so my husband drove far - leaving me here alone; without a car - to appease them. The relative drove the other half and both incurred high tolls and spent a lot on gas. They both slept at rest stops to save money. But that wasn't good enough for the neighbors. I told her the more we give the more they demand. We lost money on all the gas and tolls but now they're demanding that we pay the full vet bill. I just don't think that it's glorifying God by letting them hide behind a lie that they're without fault.

This may be a test and it may be the evil one dogging our steps again. I have been growing since being backslidden. After I was injured I turned my back on God. I came back but it's hard that He knows the hard path I walk.

I'm glad you reminded me of the Scripture "He disciplines his sons..." it helps to keep in mind that this trial has a purpose. Just sometimes it's hard to know what to do. I honestly don't know if it's right to pay their bill or not. James Dobson said when seeking God's answers to don't do anything; give God a chance to speak. So that's what I'm doing. Sometimes God will use another believer; something they say strikes a cord deep within. So I'm hoping that happens.

My family was at a neighborhood park once while our children played at the playground. Other families were there. A pitbull struck (from a house across the street from the park). In the fight that ensued, I suffered a laceration of my hand issued by the beast, and one of my children had teeth marks on his leg. The dog's owners physically approached me during the dog attack as if to want to fight me. There were about five dad's with children there, but they came after me while their dog was attacking. Our Lord Jesus protected us from devastating injury and death that day! Our Deliverer preserved us! We did not sue in court. We openly gave the glory for our preservation to Lord Jesus Christ!

On another occasion, I recall going to the grocery store with my family, and there was a muslim woman with a difficult to read sign around a pet goat's neck. In the area, most farms were gone. I realized that this must be one of the people who very recently bought the historic farm in the center of the city and were holding "farming" classes for city children, so in an attempt to strike up a conversation as this could have been an opportunity to talk about Jesus Christ with a muslim, I asked the muslim lady "Are you part of the family that bought the farm and offers classes?", and she answered "yes, and are you the people that give out Bibles at the Farmers Market?".

Sovereign Grace, you may not know who is watching, and you may not know how this fits in with God's purpose. Jesus received blows. They tore his hair out. Jesus took the cross. Believe Jesus. His promises. His words. Believe on Jesus whom the Father has sent. We know that victory is in Jesus Christ, the Son of the Living God! Rest in the power of Jesus Christ. Here are some of Lord Jesus' words of comfort and casting your concerns to Him Who heals:

"If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you." (John 15:7)

"But you, when you pray, go into your inner room, close your door and pray to your Father who is in secret, and your Father who sees [what is done] in secret will reward you." (Matthew 6:6)

"Pray, then, in this way: 'Our Father who is in heaven, Hallowed be Your name.
Your kingdom come. Your will be done, On earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil. [For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen].'
(Matthew 6:9-13)

"Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven." (Matthew 5:16)

"Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, and believe in Me." (John 14:1)

I encourage you to get back to reading the Bible, daily.

stunnedbygrace · May 5, 2019

Kermos said:
According to your logic (which is not logic), your words convey "going back to the letter" to Sovereign Grace when you write "trust" as in trust God, and you equeate trust with faith in your post #133 on page 7, so at this point you contradict yourself because you wrote the words of Jesus "equate to going back to the letter" in your post #191 on page 10 of this thread. In your post #191, you tell people that abiding the words of Lord Jesus is "going back to the letter". Lord Jesus has something to say about faith/belief:

"believe in God, and believe in Me." (John 14:1)

You say trust and faith are the same thing then you leverage the words of Lord Jesus, but in your post #191 discount the words of Lord Jesus! Lord Jesus has something to say to hypocrites:

"Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted. But woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, because you shut off the kingdom of heaven from people; for you do not enter in yourselves, nor do you allow those who are entering to go in." (Matthew 23:12-13)

Kermos said:
Do you know what we call that doctor who does such an atrocious thing of ignoring some of the writings in his medical book thus resulting in the man bleeding to death? An evil murderer. I'm just extending the example that you started.

You directly contradict the very writings of the Apostle John and the Apostle Matthew recording the words of Lord Jesus Christ in the first four citations of "Lord Jesus Christ Declares His Authoritative Word Post (in this thread)"; moreover, by extension, your argument attempts to negate the balance of the citations. To contradict Jesus Christ is antichrist. It is like that doctor.

You did not write "Oh, I'm sorry, Lord Jesus knows best". Instead you ascribe to the words of Jesus "equate to going back to the letter" as well as "for the flesh" in continued opposition to the immeasurable value of the King Jesus's words - SHAME ON YOU - such arrogance! Licentiousness and arrogance go hand in hand. Humility acknowledges the Lordship of Jesus Christ, the Son of God! Humility affirms the value of the Word of God! "Blessed are the humble, for they shall inherit the earth" says Christ Jesus the Lord (Matthew 5:5).

he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law. (Romans 13:8)

Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in strife and jealousy (Romans 13:13)

There is much divorce and remarriage within the church, and the unsaved blaspheme for they see the hypocrisy. A believer loving his/her neighbor will not remarry because the Lord Jesus says. In not remarrying, the believer does not introduce an occasion for stumbling by the neighbor.

As for the saved, our Lord Jesus has something to say about an evil person causing ones who believe in Him to stumble:

"whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea." (Matthew 18:6)

So, stunnedbygrace, it would be unwise for you to continue contradicting the words of Lord Jesus Christ, for this Jesus says:

"He who rejects Me and does not receive My sayings, has one who judges him; the word I spoke is what will judge him at the last day."

You absolutely did NOT understand me. Whether it was from not following the conversation carefully enough or something else, I don't know, but for CERTAIN, you did not understand me.

Soverign Grace · May 6, 2019

Kermos said:
My family was at a neighborhood park once while our children played at the playground. Other families were there. A pitbull struck (from a house across the street from the park). In the fight that ensued, I suffered a laceration of my hand issued by the beast, and one of my children had teeth marks on his leg. The dog's owners physically approached me during the dog attack as if to want to fight me. There were about five dad's with children there, but they came after me while their dog was attacking. Our Lord Jesus protected us from devastating injury and death that day! Our Deliverer preserved us! We did not sue in court. We openly gave the glory for our preservation to Lord Jesus Christ!

On another occasion, I recall going to the grocery store with my family, and there was a muslim woman with a difficult to read sign around a pet goat's neck. In the area, most farms were gone. I realized that this must be one of the people who very recently bought the historic farm in the center of the city and were holding "farming" classes for city children, so in an attempt to strike up a conversation as this could have been an opportunity to talk about Jesus Christ with a muslim, I asked the muslim lady "Are you part of the family that bought the farm and offers classes?", and she answered "yes, and are you the people that give out Bibles at the Farmers Market?".

Sovereign Grace, you may not know who is watching, and you may not know how this fits in with God's purpose. Jesus received blows. They tore his hair out. Jesus took the cross. Believe Jesus. His promises. His words. Believe on Jesus whom the Father has sent. We know that victory is in Jesus Christ, the Son of the Living God! Rest in the power of Jesus Christ. Here are some of Lord Jesus' words of comfort and casting your concerns to Him Who heals:

"If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you." (John 15:7)

"But you, when you pray, go into your inner room, close your door and pray to your Father who is in secret, and your Father who sees [what is done] in secret will reward you." (Matthew 6:6)

"Pray, then, in this way: 'Our Father who is in heaven, Hallowed be Your name.
Your kingdom come. Your will be done, On earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil. [For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen].'
(Matthew 6:9-13)

"Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven." (Matthew 5:16)

"Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, and believe in Me." (John 14:1)

I encourage you to get back to reading the Bible, daily.

Thank you for the encouragement - I used to read the Bible every day without fail but a lot happened and I dropped off. Now I'm reading again. I still don't know the right way to go in this. I calculated the expenses so far and we're only $80 short of paying half due to the cost of the gas and tolls spent by the relative and us. The neighbor demanded that we get the dog out of the neighborhood. To appease them we bent over backwards and I'm not sure that my husband leaving me home here alone without a car to appease the neighbors really was what God wanted. We bent over backwards, spent a lot on removing the dog and now they're demanding that we pay their cat's vet bills on top of it. They both get good government pensions and aren't hurting for money. If I knew my neighbor was sick and her husband left her to remove an animal from the neighborhood because we demanded it I'd be ashamed of myself! I told her she's more worried about money than the stress she was putting on me. At what point should self-preservation kick in and we draw a line and say "Enough!" I told her that the more we do the more they demand! I just don't know if it's glorifying God to go along with their pride. Her response to me was very prideful - that she was the neighborhood angel protecting all the children from harm, yet when her son was wreaking havoc we didn't demand that he be removed from the neighborhood. I have not heard a word from her - I don't know how to interpret it - whether they're angry we haven't paid the bill or whether they're ashamed for pointing the finger at us and now I brought in a dose of the truth: that their son was causing us distress.

We all know pride when we see it. It's a tough decision. They've been good neighbors but I don't want to be manipulated into paying their vet bills and that's what she was doing. If my cat was in their yard I would not expect them to pay my pet's vet bills, and dismiss it to them "you can't keep a cat in your yard." What the heck kind of reasoning is that? So we are supposed to pay your pet's vet bills because you let your cat roam onto our property? Our relative even told them that the dog attacked small animals in the past and she lazily chose to let her cat out. Doesn't she have the responsibility to keep her cat under control? Why should we be forced to hand over our blood, sweat, and tears because she chose to open the door and put their cat out? All we were doing was walking the dog in our own yard. That sounds like mighty selfish reasoning to me. She's absolving herself of all culpability and pointing a condemning finger at us. She had the option of keeping the cat in the house - one of our family member's had a cat that was attacked by another animal - after that they kept the cat indoors.

I'm just unsure what way to go. I don't think she should have put this problem onto us. The lawyer said they are responsible, not us. He said you did nothing wrong. If the dog had broken out of the house and attacked the cat in their yard or on the street I wouldn't have blinked an eye - I would pay the bill. But my husband was walking the dog in our own yard. Their cat was in our yard. It's not black or white - its grey.

I want to keep good relations but she said that if we don't pay the bill "our good neighborly relations will be affected." That's manipulative. Our "good neighborly relations" weren't affected when their son wreaked havoc. I understood and let it go.

What really aggravates me is that they know I'm not doing good and yet all she cares about is money. She tried pulling "legal knowledge" on me which I don't appreciate so I asked a lawyer myself who told me the neighbor is at fault. They both get good government pensions that we don't get as well as lifetime health care. Why are they pushing this? Then she acted like they held the power of life and death over the dog and I told her she was being sanctimonious. I'm going to pray about it again.

It's a tough call. I need the wisdom of Solomon.

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Divorce and Remarriage

Soverign Grace

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stunnedbygrace

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Soverign Grace

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Kermos

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Kermos

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Kermos

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stunnedbygrace

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Soverign Grace

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