A few weeks ago, I came to the realisation that God is real. Since then I have begun to pray, asked forgiveness, tried to live the best way I can....
But my life has become noticeably harder. Everything I do seems to go wrong, it is making my life miserable. Am I being tested? Punished perhaps? That is certainly how it feels.
I would welcome any insight
Generally.....The reason 'everything seems harder" as you are describing it... is because you are trying to work at Salvation, vs, just resting in it.
When you believed in Christ, and asked God for forgiveness....>He DID.
So, what you feel, is only in
your head,... as its not in His Thinking.
Being Saved, is not to live in the regret of past mistakes, or to try to perform for God, after He has SAVED you, so that you can try to stay saved.
Salvation, ... understanding it correctly, is......You sin is forgiven and you and God are Father and Child.......
forever !
You have now PEACE with God....that is caused not by your behavior, but by Christ's Death on the Cross for you.
See that? See Christ on the Cross?
That is why God forgave you, and why you will remain forgiven.
That is why God is ALWAYS at peace with you.
So, REST in this TRUTH, and find you peace for today and hope for tomorrow.