Confusing, yet familiar

[Lifelong_sinner]

Hello all. Im the new guy, a true lifelong sinner, false convert, and cynic. I have been reading some of the old posts about how to get saved, and while its mostly what i grew up hearing, its still so confusing to me.
I am not saved. Im not even sure i can say im a false convert, as i have never truly thought that i was saved. What i dont get, is that even after doing what everyone has said about getting saved, why cant i find salvation?? Why is it so hard? I dont know why i cant make it happen. What am i missing?

 

[Ferris Bueller]

Hello all. Im the new guy, a true lifelong sinner, false convert, and cynic. I have been reading some of the old posts about how to get saved, and while its mostly what i grew up hearing, its still so confusing to me.
I am not saved. Im not even sure i can say im a false convert, as i have never truly thought that i was saved. What i dont get, is that even after doing what everyone has said about getting saved, why cant i find salvation?? Why is it so hard? I dont know why i cant make it happen. What am i missing?

Where are you at on the sin issue? Your sin issue. Just knowing you're a sinner is not what saves. Falling on God's mercy, knowing there is nothing that you can do to rescue you from the wrath of God is what saves. Have you genuinely been there, yet?

 

[Ferris Bueller]

I have been reading some of the old posts about how to get saved, and while its mostly what i grew up hearing, its still so confusing to me.

Let's talk about what you know, and what we know, and we'll compare notes. By the way, welcome to the forum.

Our testimonies are probably what is going to be the most value to you.

 

[Lifelong_sinner]

Wow, even ferris got saved. Who knew.
Well, for starters, i am a sinner, and i have tried repenting quite a few times, i think i got close once, as this one time, i actually felt for like half a second that i hated one of my normal habitual sins. Ever since then though, its been nothing.
As far as what i know, i grew up in the church, i’ve always believed in God, and the story of His death, burial, and resurrection. I believe what the Bible says is truth, but i cant do as it says though. At this point, i do feel like i have given up. I dont know if i’ll ever be saved, and i told God last nite that i understood that i was an unchanged sinner and that hell is where i belong. I hate that im going to hell, but i do get its where i deserve to be.
I have one particular, willful, habitual sin that in the last couple of years i have been trying to fight, but i cant beat it so i just go along with it. I have to say, a habitual sin of over 30 yrs is difficult to beat. And it alone is why i dont believe i am saved. Untill i beat it, im guilty of practicing, planning my sin each day.

 

[Ferris Bueller]

Wow, even ferris got saved. Who knew.

I know! Go figure, lol.

Well, for starters, i am a sinner, and i have tried repenting quite a few times

It sounds like you're well on your way to realizing you can't save yourself. You're arriving at exactly the place God wants you to be at. You're doomed and there's nothing you can do about it. Even if you could repent and not sin anymore, there's still the small matter of the all the sin you've committed in the past. God has the answer for that too.

 

[Ferris Bueller]

As far as what i know, i grew up in the church, i’ve always believed in God, and the story of His death, burial, and resurrection.

Yes, you've always believed the story of God's redemption is true. You just never put your trust in it. That's the believing that saves. Simply knowing the gospel is true can't save you. Placing your faith in the gospel to save you is what saves a person.

I grew up in the church, too. But at the age of 23 I could not tell you what Jesus dying for our sins meant. I was a spiritual moron and I cried out to God for knowledge. He answered that prayer.

 

[Heart2Soul]

Hello all. Im the new guy, a true lifelong sinner, false convert, and cynic. I have been reading some of the old posts about how to get saved, and while its mostly what i grew up hearing, its still so confusing to me.
I am not saved. Im not even sure i can say im a false convert, as i have never truly thought that i was saved. What i dont get, is that even after doing what everyone has said about getting saved, why cant i find salvation?? Why is it so hard? I dont know why i cant make it happen. What am i missing?

Welcome to the forum!
To address salvation...you don't find it you accept it or reject it...it is a gift given to anyone who will accept it.
At Christmas do you accept gifts given you by family and friends, bosses and coworkers?
It's the same principle...a gift has been offered to you if you will receive it...
Once you receive it, He doesn't ask to get it back if you stumble and sin.
Once you have received this precious gift of salvation you become an adopted son or daughter into the family of God.
You said you believe in God...well that's accepting/receiving that what His Word teaches about him is true.
You have to come to Him with child-like faith.
This is what Jesus says about being a child
Matthew 18 (KJV)
¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
¹ At the same time came the disciples unto Jesus, saying, Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?
² And Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of them,
³ And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.
⁴ Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
⁵ And whoso shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me.
⁶ But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.

 

[Ferris Bueller]

I believe what the Bible says is truth, but i cant do as it says though.

You're half way there. Many unsaved people can't get past the first hurdle of believing that what the Bible says about them and their sin is true. And usually what goes with that is their claim that they are people who do good. It sounds like you're way past that. This looks encouraging.

At this point, i do feel like i have given up.

That's exactly what you need to do...give up. It's time to surrender to God. Jesus tells a story about a king who was going to war with another king...

"...what king on his way to war with another king will not first sit down and consider whether he can engage with ten thousand men the one coming against him with twenty thousand? 32And if he is unable, he will send a delegation while the other king is still far off, to ask for terms of peace." Luke 13:31-32​

See, in your unsaved state you are like a king of your own kingdom who must weigh and consider the battle you must wage with a King who is coming against you who has a much bigger army than you. You realize it's a war you can not win. Knowing this, you send a delegation ahead of the battle to this King and ask for terms of peace. Well, the only reasonable terms of peace you could possibly negotiate from your weak and dismal state is total surrender. There is no other deal you can negotiate with this Great King who is coming one day to wage war with the rebel kingdoms of this earth. The only sane and rational thing to do is make peace with Him ahead of time and surrender to Him.

The gospel is so awesome, it's hard to share all this without weeping. Jesus is such a great and merciful King. When you surrender to King Jesus He does not put you into a gloomy dungeon. He gives you a place of service in His kingdom and calls you His friend. He trains and equips you to serve in His kingdom. What King does that?

 

[BloodBought 1953]

Wow, even ferris got saved. Who knew.
Well, for starters, i am a sinner, and i have tried repenting quite a few times, i think i got close once, as this one time, i actually felt for like half a second that i hated one of my normal habitual sins. Ever since then though, its been nothing.
As far as what i know, i grew up in the church, i’ve always believed in God, and the story of His death, burial, and resurrection. I believe what the Bible says is truth, but i cant do as it says though. At this point, i do feel like i have given up. I dont know if i’ll ever be saved, and i told God last nite that i understood that i was an unchanged sinner and that hell is where i belong. I hate that im going to hell, but i do get its where i deserve to be.
I have one particular, willful, habitual sin that in the last couple of years i have been trying to fight, but i cant beat it so i just go along with it. I have to say, a habitual sin of over 30 yrs is difficult to beat. And it alone is why i dont believe i am saved. Untill i beat it, im guilty of practicing, planning my sin each day.

Rejoice! There is “ Good News” for ALL men and women that have arrived at the point that you are at! NOBODY comes to God unless the Spirit draw them, and the Spirit “ draws” men to Christ by the CONVICTION OF SINS —— and you got “ THAT” in Spades! Lol.......As Many preachers will attest to- “ ya gotta get them Lost before you can ever get them Saved!” How True! No man will Turn To God ( the TRUE “ repentance” that God is looking for—- NOT “ repenting from sins” ) until he sees the Absolute NEED to Turn to God......

We are Saved by Faith Alone.....Faith is Believing or putting your complete Trust in a Promise Of God........Here is the Promise to Believe in order to get Saved. Forever. 1 Cor 15:1-4 is the Gospel That Saves .....it was revealed by Paul after it was given to him by Jesus personally . Jesus said, using Paul as his spokesman , that if you simply Believe that Jesus died for your sins and rose from the dead you WILL BE SAVED! Simply believe that Promise and don’t make the mistake of trying to Add to it with sincere but erroneous things like having to Repent Of all of your Sins before you die , or having to Keep the Commandments ( Commandments Given to show that you can’t keep them and you MUST have Grace....Don't let the Legalists succeed in wrapping you up in their Chains Of Bondage ....

You are now “a FREE MAN in Christ” .....if you have simply Believed the Gospel , God will make you a New Creation with a New Heart and God will Transform your “ wants” and “desires” so that they, in time, will line up with His....Just give God the TRUST that he longs for from you and He in turn will give you EVERYTHiNG —— Salvation Especially !

Never forget.....you got SAVED by Believing a Promise Of God, and once again, that is what Faith is....as Paul says we are to Continue on our Christian Journey the same Way that we started it —- FAITH! “ The Just shall * LIVE* by Faith....YOU concentrate on YOUR Part ( Faith) and Trust God to take care of HIS Part ( Cleaning you up from the inside out.....it will take time)......learn to “ let go and let God”..... you will be AMAZED by what happens!

I suspect that you may already BE Saved, but you just lack Assurance because of the common misunderstanding over “ repentance”.......Repentance means “ A change of mind” when it comes to Salvation....If you have changed your mind from NOT Believing in Jesus to be Saved to actually Believing in Jesus to be Saved.....you have done all the “ repenting” that you will ever need to do in order to get Saved.....May God Bless you ( in fact, He already has! ) and know that you will be in my Prayers!

 

[Addy]

So glad BB showed up.

Welcome to the forums @Lifelong_sinner

 

[Ferris Bueller]

i told God last nite that i understood that i was an unchanged sinner and that hell is where i belong. I hate that im going to hell, but i do get its where i deserve to be.

Like I say, you're way ahead of the curve here. Very few get to this point. You're ripening up very nicely to be harvested for salvation. It sounds like you're no longer in the great debate with God about your sinfulness. So many people never get past that stage.

 

[Ferris Bueller]

I have one particular, willful, habitual sin that in the last couple of years i have been trying to fight, but i cant beat it so i just go along with it. I have to say, a habitual sin of over 30 yrs is difficult to beat. And it alone is why i dont believe i am saved. Untill i beat it, im guilty of practicing, planning my sin each day.

After you are saved God will make you a warrior in His kingdom. He will lead you into victory over that sin. But you have to get saved first. You already know the futility of trying to patch yourself up for God. That's a no-win. I think you know that now. Sounds like salvation is your next step. If there's a 'fomula' for getting saved, it's this...

"...the tax collector stood at a distance, unwilling even to lift up his eyes to heaven. Instead, he beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner!’ I tell you, this man, rather than the Pharisee, went home justified." Luke 18:13-14​

 

[bbyrd009]

hey ferris, nice imo!
i was so sure you were gonna quote acts 238 or something
“warrior” i would wanna qualify a bit more maybe, but i gave you a like anyway

Hello all. Im the new guy, a true lifelong sinner, false convert, and cynic. I have been reading some of the old posts about how to get saved, and while its mostly what i grew up hearing, its still so confusing to me.
I am not saved. Im not even sure i can say im a false convert, as i have never truly thought that i was saved. What i dont get, is that even after doing what everyone has said about getting saved, why cant i find salvation?? Why is it so hard? I dont know why i cant make it happen. What am i missing?

you say that you arent saved, yet here you are talking to us?
so i gotta ask, “saved” from what?
or, what does “salvation” mean to you?
and, can you Quote a v (a single v) that supports that pov?

bc i can say with a bit of confidence that saying you are saved, believing you are saved, thinking you are saved, even being convinced that you are saved, none of these mean that you are saved, necessarily

 

[bbyrd009]

even after doing what everyone has said about getting saved

ah i see; listening to priests and/or levites, i guess

 

[Lifelong_sinner]

Wow, a lot of responses. Thanks all. But let me clarify a few things. There are some serious problems that i deal with. Problems that i cant sort out myself.
1. When asked, why do i want to be a christian, my response is, to get saved and not go to hell. I also was asked, if universal salvation were true, which i know its not, but if it were, would i still want to be a christian. My response was, if i already knew i was going to Heaven, no matter what i did, then no, i wouldnt give any thought to God. So the first problem is, i look at salvation and everything that goes with it merely as my “get out of hell for free” card. Thats probably not the best attitude to have.
2. I have a habitual sin that no matter how hard i try, i cant stop. On the outside, i know its a sin but only because the Bible says so. On the inside, i love it. And this is where my biggest problem is. I literally cannot stop this sin, i have tried, and fought, and always lose against it. And now, i have become tired of fighting a losing battle. I am a slave to that sin. And furthermore, it makes me confused/angry that this one thing i love to do is a sin and is sending me to hell. The one thing that actually brings me any joy in life, is also condemning me to hell.
3. Someone asked for a verse as to why im not saved. Too easy.
1 john 3:6
1 corinthians 6:9-10
Those are a couple of them.

 

[Ferris Bueller]

“warrior” i would wanna qualify a bit more maybe, but i gave you a like anyway

Read this with your battle against sin in mind...

Psalm 18:34-48

34He trains my hands for battle;

my arms can bend a bow of bronze.

35You have given me Your shield of salvation;

Your right hand upholds me,

and Your gentleness exalts me.c

36You broaden the path beneath me

so that my ankles do not give way.

37I pursued my enemies and overtook them;

I did not turn back until they were consumed.

38I crushed them so they could not rise;

they have fallen under my feet.

39You have armed me with strength for battle;

You have subdued my foes beneath me.

40You have made my enemies retreat before me;

I put an end to those who hated me.

41They cried for help, but there was no one to save them—

to the LORD, but He did not answer.

42I ground them as dust in the face of the wind;

I trampled themd like mud in the streets.

43You have delivered me from the strife of the people;

You have made me the head of nations;

a people I had not known shall serve me.

44When they hear me, they obey me;

foreigners cower before me.

45Foreigners lose heart

and come trembling from their strongholds.

46The LORD lives, and blessed be my Rock!

And may the God of my salvation be exalted—

47the God who avenges me

and subdues nations beneath me,

48who delivers me from my enemies.

You exalt me above my foes
​

Sin is the foe and the enemy that we subdue and make captive to us. It is the Lord who outfits us for such a battle and delivers that foe into our hands.

 

[Addy]

1. When asked, why do i want to be a christian, my response is, to get saved and not go to hell. I also was asked, if universal salvation were true, which i know its not, but if it were, would i still want to be a christian. My response was, if i already knew i was going to Heaven, no matter what i did, then no, i wouldnt give any thought to God. So the first problem is, i look at salvation and everything that goes with it merely as my “get out of hell for free” card. Thats probably not the best attitude to have.
2. I have a habitual sin that no matter how hard i try, i cant stop. On the outside, i know its a sin but only because the Bible says so. On the inside, i love it. And this is where my biggest problem is. I literally cannot stop this sin, i have tried, and fought, and always lose against it. And now, i have become tired of fighting a losing battle. I am a slave to that sin. And furthermore, it makes me confused/angry that this one thing i love to do is a sin and is sending me to hell. The one thing that actually brings me any joy in life, is also condemning me to hell.
3. Someone asked for a verse as to why im not saved. Too easy.

Oh my goodness... I hear and FEEL your anguish... and it is deep indeed... I would encourage you to listen to what @Blood Bought 1953 is saying to you... You want to stay away from the teaching that YOU can lose your salvation... YOU are already dealing with the FEELINGS that you don't have it in the first place. That is something you are going to have to face and deal with..
From what I have read... YOU are a Christian ( if you have accepted Jesus CHRIST as your SAVIOUR )... but you are dealing with habitual sin... with truck loads of guilt and shame... AND frustration.

Focus on thinking about and talking with JESUS... He's your guy... He knows you... HE loves you... He wants your heart... HE will clean you up. HE promises to finish within HIS CHILDREN what HE has begun.

 

[Ferris Bueller]

When asked, why do i want to be a christian, my response is, to get saved and not go to hell.

I don't see anything wrong with that. I wanted to be saved because I knew that when I died I would not go to be with God. Of course, my first steps toward going to be with God when I die was to try to stop sinning. Which then led me to the futility of trying to do that. Which led me to asking for God's mercy and surrendering to Him in complete failure knowing I can't from here to there. And that is when I was saved, and when I received the Holy Spirit, and which made it so I cold actually have power over sin. It was the difference between night and day for me. I had a new life. Time started all over again for me. It truly was like being 'born again'.

 

[Ferris Bueller]

I have a habitual sin that no matter how hard i try, i cant stop. On the outside, i know its a sin but only because the Bible says so. On the inside, i love it. And this is where my biggest problem is. I literally cannot stop this sin, i have tried, and fought, and always lose against it. And now, i have become tired of fighting a losing battle. I am a slave to that sin. And furthermore, it makes me confused/angry that this one thing i love to do is a sin and is sending me to hell. The one thing that actually brings me any joy in life, is also condemning me to hell.

We've already been over the 'no matter how hard I try, I can't stop' thing. You are correct in that you say you are a slave to sin. That is exactly how the Bible describes it. And you say you are weary of the battle—this losing battle. These are all good things that one must experience before they can be saved. Maybe someone can field your inquiry about your love for the sin that you know condemns you. Sin is pleasurable. Even the Bible says that. But I will say a fundamental dislike for what you love is going to have to occur somewhere along the line. I mean somewhere in all this your salvation is going to have to mean more to you than the sin you say you love. Maybe someone can offer some useful testimony for you about this. When I got saved I was ready to leave it all behind. I don't have any reservations against saying some people probably have to spend a little more time in the smelting furnace before they are ready to leave it all behind and be transformed in salvation. I am one that does not believe in rushing people into the kingdom of God. There are costs to be weighed and considered.

 

[Lifelong_sinner]

But I will say a fundamental dislike for what you love is going to have to occur somewhere along the line. I mean somewhere in all this your salvation is going to have to mean more to you than the sin you say you love.

This!!! Its funny you mention that because this past weekend i thought the same thing. The only joy in my life is when i sin, and since i cant stop it, i knew that the only way to beat that sin is by finding something else even more enjoyable to make me forget that sin.

but the question is, what is it exactly about your salvation that makes you put it first?? I know that sounds dumb, but, maybe a better way to ask it is how does salvation physically bring you joy??