Hi there,
So something that will vex you until you have understood, it is important not to claim that your faith is your doing. Jesus said "You did not choose Me, but I chose you" (John, from memory). What He meant by this, is that the Father Himself has forgiven you, now you must accept what has been done for you and respond in kind. In the perspective of Wisdom, that is respond in kind, for the rest of your life - actually plan to respond to God, for the rest of your life, no matter what happens. This kind of commitment, gets the Devil's attention: but you can always show him, the Door you are headed for. That is something you can do in this life, that the Devil will not be able to ignore.
The more the Devil can predict, the path you are going to take in life, the less he will persecute you - if you are taking up your cross, daily, where your cross has lead should become more and more obvious (the Devil can't ignore that). How much greater then, that struggle, if you are daily praising God, for what He has done on your cross, that forgiveness be extended to you, no matter what you have done (in principle). It becomes a consistent theme, that you are able to anticipate and celebrate more and more. God gave you the power, now you must walk worthily! Do not be frustrated that others do not share this walk with you, remember Solomon's admonition about the "good life": it is three score years and ten (70 years), in principle you should have a good life's worth of praise, by the time you reach seventy.
As you do this, you will discover that you have learnt to trust the Holy Spirit, that He has confided in you what it is that displeases God, and what in you that has pleased God. This is the beginning of discernment, which will carry you through to the appropriate praises for God, from the heart, as your testimony continues to establish that God has saved you, that you are loved, that you are received. We cannot do these things on our own, but the Holy Spirit enables us: He knew how much time we had left, what good repentance has done for us, what acceptance of God we revere God for - the Holy Spirit has a foundation of trust, on which to draw, to serve your conviction and your spirit and your answer. You will begin to be happy with the Lord, things (especially in the faith) will start to make sense. This is the nature of spiritual strength. It gives us word, and holiness and reverence.
So become familiar with the works of repentance, to trust what God has done and commit simply to the good life - all these things will be great in God's sight and He will bless and continue to bless you favourably. This is your calling! The things of this world will grow strangely dim, in the light of His Glory and Grace! Daily ask yourself "how familiar am I, with the works of forgiveness God has done for me this Day?" You will not need to grow in the kingdom of darkness, but will have the light of life and a crown that surpasses everything, because you have not left your God without praise, from the time He knew you, to now. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble (Jesus) - part of that is acknowledging today what God has already done. You cannot grow, all manner of fruit, in a Day, but Day by Day the Word of God can be sown in your heart and there is room to rejoice in what was to come!
I hope you receive this, as a blessing.
So something that will vex you until you have understood, it is important not to claim that your faith is your doing. Jesus said "You did not choose Me, but I chose you" (John, from memory). What He meant by this, is that the Father Himself has forgiven you, now you must accept what has been done for you and respond in kind. In the perspective of Wisdom, that is respond in kind, for the rest of your life - actually plan to respond to God, for the rest of your life, no matter what happens. This kind of commitment, gets the Devil's attention: but you can always show him, the Door you are headed for. That is something you can do in this life, that the Devil will not be able to ignore.
The more the Devil can predict, the path you are going to take in life, the less he will persecute you - if you are taking up your cross, daily, where your cross has lead should become more and more obvious (the Devil can't ignore that). How much greater then, that struggle, if you are daily praising God, for what He has done on your cross, that forgiveness be extended to you, no matter what you have done (in principle). It becomes a consistent theme, that you are able to anticipate and celebrate more and more. God gave you the power, now you must walk worthily! Do not be frustrated that others do not share this walk with you, remember Solomon's admonition about the "good life": it is three score years and ten (70 years), in principle you should have a good life's worth of praise, by the time you reach seventy.
As you do this, you will discover that you have learnt to trust the Holy Spirit, that He has confided in you what it is that displeases God, and what in you that has pleased God. This is the beginning of discernment, which will carry you through to the appropriate praises for God, from the heart, as your testimony continues to establish that God has saved you, that you are loved, that you are received. We cannot do these things on our own, but the Holy Spirit enables us: He knew how much time we had left, what good repentance has done for us, what acceptance of God we revere God for - the Holy Spirit has a foundation of trust, on which to draw, to serve your conviction and your spirit and your answer. You will begin to be happy with the Lord, things (especially in the faith) will start to make sense. This is the nature of spiritual strength. It gives us word, and holiness and reverence.
So become familiar with the works of repentance, to trust what God has done and commit simply to the good life - all these things will be great in God's sight and He will bless and continue to bless you favourably. This is your calling! The things of this world will grow strangely dim, in the light of His Glory and Grace! Daily ask yourself "how familiar am I, with the works of forgiveness God has done for me this Day?" You will not need to grow in the kingdom of darkness, but will have the light of life and a crown that surpasses everything, because you have not left your God without praise, from the time He knew you, to now. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble (Jesus) - part of that is acknowledging today what God has already done. You cannot grow, all manner of fruit, in a Day, but Day by Day the Word of God can be sown in your heart and there is room to rejoice in what was to come!
I hope you receive this, as a blessing.