my child's problem

[davidchen]

I found pornography pics on my child's computer,I need to block all porn websites, can anyone give me some advice to keep my child out of porn ? Currently my friend tell me I can install a software on his computer, but I think it's better to tell him that's no good to view porn, no good to health, anyone can give me some advice on how to talk with my child?

 

[Broken Crusader]

I didn't want to leave you hanging, so I'm hoping to be inspired here.I'm no expert, but I agree, instead of just doing something "behind the scenes", I would try to approach him directly. Try of course to give him a perspective of understanding. The fact is God made some woman very beautiful. It's not an excuse for porn by any stretch, but it can be a stepping point to ease into the conversation. What you need to explain to him is that God never intended us to look at woman in that context, and not only is doing that offensive to God, but it encourages and support the very industry that leads you woman who are mothers, daughters, sisters to do something horrible with their bodies for money.I might also explain the notion of a virtuous woman, ask him who does he see his wife being in the future. I don't know his age, nor how you two relate, and he might say, "well dad, I want one of them!" I think he needs to really look at who he wants to be with and what kind of person she will be. And how porn may degrade that image in the future, even to a point that he may not understand what loving a woman really is.The most important that you have to talk. Be firm with your son and get him to understand that this is unacceptable behavior, but look him in the eyes and love him the whole way through.

 

[Christina]

Broken Crusader has done very well here I agree with him I would just add that you should assure him his feeling are normal and natural a part of growing up, but that doesnt mean he doesnt have to learn how to controll them thats part of growing up also.Let him know that he can talk to you about it if he has futher questions.Then I would add the Software Just to take away some of the temptation otherwise is sense he is a kid. Its kind of like tellig him he shouldn't eat candy cause its bad for him the leaving the bag of candy in his room and expecting him not to sneak a piece.hers a link you might find helpful on tips to talk to your teenshttp://www.mvparents.com/article.php?aid=42&cid=1

 

[HammerStone]

Good advice, but I am afraid this is a spam user. I will leave this thread for informational purposes.

 

[justchristiana]

I agree with broken crusader. I think blocking the access is not really helping as he might be become more curious and even worse he would try to find it somewhere else that might lead him to the wrong understanding. It is difficult enough to deal with the "hormonal " issue i guess and it would be more difficult for him if the closest person who is his parents are pressuring him. My suggestion is just try to be his friend, listen to him, give him a chance to tell you what makes him interested there then give the right understanding from the prepective of christianity, biologically and socially just as broken crusader suggested.I worked with children and teenagers few years ago, and the worst case I found was their parents cannot be friends to them. They felt like nobody wants to listen or talk to them. I guess being their trusted friend will help you to know what problem they are dealing with and give you chance to help them as well.Good luck, God bless!.

 

[MickinEngland]

Like many schoolkids years ago, we used to snigger as we furtively leafed through the porn mags at the newsagents, but I gradually grew to hate it for its coldness and lovelessness and it simply lost its interest for me.I grew up determined never to be like the dead-eyed 'porn stars', and instead to treat women with warmth and respect.So in a way being exposed to porn like that did me a lot of good by putting me off it for life..