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Not drinking

Discussion in 'Addiction & Recovery Forum' started by FluffyYellowDuck, Apr 22, 2021.

  1. FluffyYellowDuck

    FluffyYellowDuck Well-Known Member

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    Five years sober - no alcohol. I guess I was triggered in a bad untampered usually kept safe place cause I keep wanting a bottle of wine and I've been holding back tears for a while and trying to hide it, but they keep flowing anyway so i turned the lights off so nobody would notice.

    I just felt like if I told someone it would help.

    I'm not going to do anything. The thought just keeps coming up. I had two bowls of cereal instead. I might have a third. I might have four. I should have the whole box. Throw the whole thing in there. I'm mad at myself for not getting the kind with marshmallows.
     
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  2. April_Rose

    April_Rose Well-Known Member

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    Good for you great job!!! :D
     
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  3. FluffyYellowDuck

    FluffyYellowDuck Well-Known Member

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    Thank you . :) Usually don't struggle with it at all, but thought I would feel better if I got it out to someone
     
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  4. April_Rose

    April_Rose Well-Known Member

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    Personally I take a drink very rarely but not as much as I would call myself an alcoholic. :)
     
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  5. TLHKAJ

    TLHKAJ Well-Known Member

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  6. TLHKAJ

    TLHKAJ Well-Known Member

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    I was between tears and anger for a whole day or so after that stupid thread .... so I totally get it.
     
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  7. TLHKAJ

    TLHKAJ Well-Known Member

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    Well, it was a couple different threads that popped up all around the same time. Seemed there was a theme happening for a little while now.
     
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  8. FluffyYellowDuck

    FluffyYellowDuck Well-Known Member

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    @TLHKAJ Yeah, me too. Haven't been that angry in a long time. That was definitely what did it. Also never came out publicly about it before let alone openly admitting it to myself without keeping an emotional distance from it or partly denying it to myself, so sort of feels like things coming up to the surface.

    Luckily I'm getting tired so maybe I'll sleep it off and be okay in the morning.
     
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  9. FluffyYellowDuck

    FluffyYellowDuck Well-Known Member

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    I'm glad I didn't see them all. I hope the poster gets banned. That would be nice. I was holding back a LOT.
     
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  10. TLHKAJ

    TLHKAJ Well-Known Member

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    Haha... I didn't hold back and really didn't care. I hate bigotry and injustice. But it did hit on my own personal experiences.
     
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  11. FluffyYellowDuck

    FluffyYellowDuck Well-Known Member

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    I sure did! Riled me right up, which is hard to do. Man, it hurt. Didn't expect to have such a strong emotional response.

    Same and same.

    God heals though. Maybe it is just a breakthrough moment I didn't know I needed.
     
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  12. Hidden In Him

    Hidden In Him Well-Known Member

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    Wow. With the marshmallows?! That IS the hard stuff. :eek: I've been hitting the Frosted Flakes a little myself lately. If I'm adding a little whipping cream or something heavy on top after the milk, that's when I know I'm in pretty deep.

    But He delivers us all.

    I prefer little musical pick-me-ups in the Spirit of God, though, so here's one I've been spreading around a lot lately and it never gets old. It was created by a Christian woman, partly in memory of her kids (3:15).

    Be a fighter, sister. It's what she's saying in 1:18, and I love when the Spirit of a Conqueror rises within a woman of God. We need more of them. The time of the Lioness is coming.


     
    Last edited: Apr 23, 2021
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  13. Hidden In Him

    Hidden In Him Well-Known Member

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    If it's the one I'm thinking of, yeah. He got banned for six months. It was actually a comedy of errors, though. There is another ministry called "Amos Singh Ministries," and he's a Muslim. They confused him with that one, and gave him the noose for half a year.

    I think it was fate, though. Some members were actually eating that stuff up, so I figured it was just as well. Adios Amigo.


    [​IMG]
     
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  14. FluffyYellowDuck

    FluffyYellowDuck Well-Known Member

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    Lol "the hard stuff" I never get the kind I want, I just get the cheapest according to ounces so it lasts longer. Regrets.

    Well I hope that they deal with it soon. In my opinion, abusing the word of God to promote sexual abuse is worse than being an unbeliever. That is some cult-like mentality and it is against the word.

    I guess it set me off.

    I told myself today that if I could get up and make the bed I would be able to finish the rest of the day. I had my day off to be a mess and I need to get back on track. That worked, so I have to take care of kids, animals, get to cleaning and then get my homework done and then teach. I can push through. That's two wins.

    I almost didn't click the link because it had a tiger but I did it and I didn't die, that's three wins. It is a nice song. Exposure therapy. I'm pacing myself.

    And April made me promise to not disappear on her again on Twitter so I am on extra exposure mode so that's four wins. Plus my mom told me to knock it off with the disappearing on the internet all of the time so I'm being extra held to it.

    Slowly flourishing
    Like a tree in bloom
    Or something like that
     
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  15. April_Rose

    April_Rose Well-Known Member

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    I wish I knew what the heck everybody is talking about. :confused:
     
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  16. April_Rose

    April_Rose Well-Known Member

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    So far the only thing I get is the Twitter thing. XD
     
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  17. FluffyYellowDuck

    FluffyYellowDuck Well-Known Member

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    There was a thread yesterday supporting spousal rape, it was deleted and taken care of but got into a little bit of a tiff about it. Took it very personally
     
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  18. Mayflower

    Mayflower Well-Known Member

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    Good for you Fluff. Do whatever it takes. What kind do you like? I'm a cheerio or corn flake lady myself. Or juice is a healthy drink if you are full. :)
     
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  19. Mayflower

    Mayflower Well-Known Member

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    I can't even begin to read a thread like that. I can see how it can be triggering. Best thing to combat them feelings is the GOS-PILL. Hehe. Get it? Garments of praise and worship. How I got out of my tiff...but was a bit melodramatic. I should have had some cereal. :)
     
  20. FluffyYellowDuck

    FluffyYellowDuck Well-Known Member

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    Honestly, lucky charms lol but I usually go straight for the frosted wheaties for the fiber! It makes me feel like I have more energy during the day. I used to skip breakfast but since I'm trying to gain weight, I've been having cereal almost every morning.
     
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