Relationship help

[Tkinnie]

I've been dating my gf for going on almost 9 years now. We've been on and off in the past but the last couple of year have been constant. We have 2 kids, we live together, we basically do everything married couples do, but we're not married. I know this is sin, exactly why I asked her multiple times to get married, her excuses are always shes not ready or we need to work on things... Just a few weeks ago I told her I may enlist in the army, she gets excited and says after I get back from basic training, we can marry... and thats 2 months... I then ask her why not now??? we've been together this long living in sin, whats the wait???? I mean to me it seems as though she wants to be single, all of her friends are single, she wants to go out and do things excluding me, she's never content with being at home. She even sometimes dresses provocative... She even told me that she is allowed to talk to any guy she wants, but she hides the fact that she does. I love her so its hard to just let her go, but is that something I must do??? What are your thoughts???

 

[WhiteKnuckle]

We need another side of the story before being able to comment with any merit.

It sounds odd that she wants to wait until you're out of basic. Need more info.
She wants to exclude you. From what? Need more info.
She's never content being at home? Need more info.
Clothing she wears,, where and when? Need more info.
Why isn't she allowed to talk to any guys? Need more info (Redflag against you for this part.)

 

[Comm.Arnold]

You have been with this girl for nine years ? Come on brother give your head a shake.

 

[Lively Stone]

Tim, are you and your girlfriend born again? Obviously you seem to be aware that you have been living together out of the will of God. Is there any wonder there is trouble in your relationship? It is about 100% determinable that living together outside of marriage brings trouble, and that is compounded by bringing children into the picture.

Both of you need to start at the beginning again---receive Jesus Christ and live according to God's will. It's definitely not in the children's best interest to now suddenly separate, but you both need to make that decision to marry and then do it right away---if you are both believers. If only one of you is a Christian, then the Christian partner must not marry the unbeliever, and separation is something that will have to be seriously considered.

 

[prism]

Why in the world do you want to enlist in the army while in the middle of a half baked relationship?

Perhaps you want to flee? And now she is showing glee?
You need to get the relationship mended or otherwise end it,
Ring the bells or say your farewells,
And of course the children are left undefended.