split second blackout rage

[ThePuffyBlob]

this is probably morality and ethics but at the same time maybe this is a part of spiritual war

is this blackout rage for a split second? but how come i don't remember that i was on that verge of point? i am angry but not too angry to the point that i would go on a rampage

this happened to me just a moment ago for the first time all my life that split second never been my intention it just happens so suddenly and i was like why did i do that?? that was so embarrassing it never been my intention to shout and say "Shut Up! and be Quiet!" to my nieces because they were disrespecting their mother and their grandmother

their mom asked them to do something but they said "no" followed by "since you said that this is our job where's our salary?" "give it to us!" they are now demanding a salary "i demand that you give us our salary in order for us to do that mom!" i was like are you kidding me? at first i think highly of these kids because they are supposed to be Godly(their other grand parents has their own church and they've been with the word of God since birth) they also opposed and preaches that you can't do that you can't just say "God's name/title" in vain in the phrase omg of those youths nowadays in the philippines(since it's common in other countries to say omg like it's nothing but not in the philippines) but then now they themselves are saying omg all the time...

i did get offended but it's nothing to worry about i can tolerate these things with no worries can tolerate their unreasonable reasonings i.e while the wash room is still vacant and they happened to see you walk to the washroom your niece then take over the wash room before you even step in saying "uncle let me first i just keep on restraining my bladder even if it was about to explode because i was too busy watching the tv"

but because their mom asked me to baby sit them while they are searching for a suitable maid..

i've been already here for 2-3weeks and i've never been so angry with them nor did i do something bad to them their mom who was my sister together with his husband knows about my bad temper and everytime i did something to them i immediately confessed to their parents of course my sis's husband did not say anything but i bet he is quite angry when i lost control(but this was different this time just that i can't explain more clear)

this is the only time i did it i shouted to them while my mom and my nieces are talking to each other while my sis with them they just do not respect mom and they keep talking nonstop saying they do not want to hear what their grandma wants to say despite their own mother telling them to listen they insisted that they do not want to

and this filled me with rage i want to do something but i can't and i don't have the right to i am angry but i don't plan to take an action but suddenly there i shouted the moment that i did it it i clearly do not have the memory of me getting ready or something like that the moment that it triggers i just have no idea why but i remember i did say that out loud

their parents only asked them to do 1 chore everyday that is to take out the trash bag outside and this was too easy for a tween and a 13yr old

 

[stunnedbygrace]

If you watch them, you make rules for what they must do when the parents are gone and you have been put in charge. Run these rules by the parents and make sure they will support you or else it will be a free for all when they leave.

But if the parents won't make their own children respect them, you getting angry isn't going to change that. Seems to me all you can do is make them behave with YOU.

 

[Pearl]

When I reached that certain age I found I had a very short fuse at times.

 

[VictoryinJesus]

this is probably morality and ethics but at the same time maybe this is a part of spiritual war

is this blackout rage for a split second? but how come i don't remember that i was on that verge of point? i am angry but not too angry to the point that i would go on a rampage

this happened to me just a moment ago for the first time all my life that split second never been my intention it just happens so suddenly and i was like why did i do that?? that was so embarrassing it never been my intention to shout and say "Shut Up! and be Quiet!" to my nieces because they were disrespecting their mother and their grandmother

their mom asked them to do something but they said "no" followed by "since you said that this is our job where's our salary?" "give it to us!" they are now demanding a salary "i demand that you give us our salary in order for us to do that mom!" i was like are you kidding me? at first i think highly of these kids because they are supposed to be Godly(their other grand parents has their own church and they've been with the word of God since birth) they also opposed and preaches that you can't do that you can't just say "God's name/title" in vain in the phrase omg of those youths nowadays in the philippines(since it's common in other countries to say omg like it's nothing but not in the philippines) but then now they themselves are saying omg all the time...

i did get offended but it's nothing to worry about i can tolerate these things with no worries can tolerate their unreasonable reasonings i.e while the wash room is still vacant and they happened to see you walk to the washroom your niece then take over the wash room before you even step in saying "uncle let me first i just keep on restraining my bladder even if it was about to explode because i was too busy watching the tv"

but because their mom asked me to baby sit them while they are searching for a suitable maid..

i've been already here for 2-3weeks and i've never been so angry with them nor did i do something bad to them their mom who was my sister together with his husband knows about my bad temper and everytime i did something to them i immediately confessed to their parents of course my sis's husband did not say anything but i bet he is quite angry when i lost control(but this was different this time just that i can't explain more clear)

this is the only time i did it i shouted to them while my mom and my nieces are talking to each other while my sis with them they just do not respect mom and they keep talking nonstop saying they do not want to hear what their grandma wants to say despite their own mother telling them to listen they insisted that they do not want to

and this filled me with rage i want to do something but i can't and i don't have the right to i am angry but i don't plan to take an action but suddenly there i shouted the moment that i did it it i clearly do not have the memory of me getting ready or something like that the moment that it triggers i just have no idea why but i remember i did say that out loud

their parents only asked them to do 1 chore everyday that is to take out the trash bag outside and this was too easy for a tween and a 13yr old

can relate to much of what you’ve said. I have grandchildren all around me and sometimes it is overwhelming the direction it is all taking. Sometimes our house is destroyed when they come to visit and I don’t mean just dirtying it up with toys but breaking everything that is breakable. One granddaughter I’ve butt heads with because she lives with us full time right now and whenever she doesn’t like what I say she literally sticks out her tongue at me or says “I hate you” repeatedly. She has a habit of getting enraged when her little sister (two years old) who pushes at her so then she turns around and hauls off and slams her baby sister on her rear-end and then everyone is crying. I tell her it is not right for her baby sister to push her, but she is older and knows better and should know how to control her temper. That she is older and should know you don’t push down someone who hasn’t learned better yet. Learned though....this should also apply to me. Here is the thing...they are children. Right now ...I’m the adult and should have more restraint in my behavior towards them. Like you I hate the behaviors but LOVE my grandchildren as I want better for them and in life that is all headed toward a bad place. A new model (Him not us)would help. Only God can fix it so everyday I’m asking Him to help with the destructive behaviors (even my own)and to help me be a model of something better. Not one who goes off the rails like a child shoving back someone who hasn’t learned better, just because I’ve been shoved. Sometimes an “I love you” returned to an “I hate you” completely dissolves the behaviors.

 

[Waiting on him]

this is probably morality and ethics but at the same time maybe this is a part of spiritual war

is this blackout rage for a split second? but how come i don't remember that i was on that verge of point? i am angry but not too angry to the point that i would go on a rampage

this happened to me just a moment ago for the first time all my life that split second never been my intention it just happens so suddenly and i was like why did i do that?? that was so embarrassing it never been my intention to shout and say "Shut Up! and be Quiet!" to my nieces because they were disrespecting their mother and their grandmother

their mom asked them to do something but they said "no" followed by "since you said that this is our job where's our salary?" "give it to us!" they are now demanding a salary "i demand that you give us our salary in order for us to do that mom!" i was like are you kidding me? at first i think highly of these kids because they are supposed to be Godly(their other grand parents has their own church and they've been with the word of God since birth) they also opposed and preaches that you can't do that you can't just say "God's name/title" in vain in the phrase omg of those youths nowadays in the philippines(since it's common in other countries to say omg like it's nothing but not in the philippines) but then now they themselves are saying omg all the time...

i did get offended but it's nothing to worry about i can tolerate these things with no worries can tolerate their unreasonable reasonings i.e while the wash room is still vacant and they happened to see you walk to the washroom your niece then take over the wash room before you even step in saying "uncle let me first i just keep on restraining my bladder even if it was about to explode because i was too busy watching the tv"

but because their mom asked me to baby sit them while they are searching for a suitable maid..

i've been already here for 2-3weeks and i've never been so angry with them nor did i do something bad to them their mom who was my sister together with his husband knows about my bad temper and everytime i did something to them i immediately confessed to their parents of course my sis's husband did not say anything but i bet he is quite angry when i lost control(but this was different this time just that i can't explain more clear)

this is the only time i did it i shouted to them while my mom and my nieces are talking to each other while my sis with them they just do not respect mom and they keep talking nonstop saying they do not want to hear what their grandma wants to say despite their own mother telling them to listen they insisted that they do not want to

and this filled me with rage i want to do something but i can't and i don't have the right to i am angry but i don't plan to take an action but suddenly there i shouted the moment that i did it it i clearly do not have the memory of me getting ready or something like that the moment that it triggers i just have no idea why but i remember i did say that out loud

their parents only asked them to do 1 chore everyday that is to take out the trash bag outside and this was too easy for a tween and a 13yr old

Sounds as if there’s some confusion as to who the authority is?

 

[Windmillcharge]

A couple of things.
If you have had a blackout, get yourself checked over by a doctor.

Shouting at anybody is counter productive, they are only going to shout back.
As has been mentioned, how do their parents expect them to behave and how do they enforce discipline.
Once you know the background rules of at their home and the ground rules for the home you are in, you go along with them.

You have two many tools.
One, to tell their parents , show videos of their behaviour either good or bad for their parents to deal with.
Second, to talk to them about treats that are available to them at the end of your time if the known and do go over them, rules are followed.
The carrot and the stick works most of the time.

 

[ThePuffyBlob]

If you watch them, you make rules for what they must do when the parents are gone and you have been put in charge. Run these rules by the parents and make sure they will support you or else it will be a free for all when they leave.

But if the parents won't make their own children respect them, you getting angry isn't going to change that. Seems to me all you can do is make them behave with YOU.

or i could just turn a blind eye by putting on a headset and just listen to music with a loud volume... i did it again lol but this time it was intentional seems i am just fed up told them that i wanna go home lol

they are children. Right now ...I’m the adult and should have more restraint in my behavior towards them

i also realized this after i posted this thread

Sometimes our house is destroyed when they come to visit and I don’t mean just dirtying it up with toys but breaking everything that is breakable

that's what happened to my home everytime my other niece/nephew from my other sibling visits i already know what to do that is to hide the vases and glass

she doesn’t like what I say she literally sticks out her tongue at me or says “I hate you” repeatedly

this is the words that they can't say to their grandparents nor their aunts/uncles nor anyone other than the same age as them because if they do they would be disciplined right away by their parents with a long candy spanking -the way we talk here in the philippines is different compare to america

Sounds as if there’s some confusion as to who the authority is?

yeah because it never been my intention to or have i even planned to try to say it

it just happened so suddenly so did someone take over of me like a possession for a split sec?

Shouting at anybody is counter productive, they are only going to shout back.

nope they shut up immediately
hopefully my sis didn't misunderstood because i shout at them to shut up including the 2kids 1elderly 1pregnant she might think that because they are too noisy that i shouted i just hope that she can see the hidden thing it's because of the 2kids not showing respect to the 2 of them

Once you know the background rules of at their home and the ground rules for the home you are in, you go along with them.

oh this is the thing that can't be done i can't bonding with people even kids because i can't interact so i always look gloomy and scary to them so they are basically kind of afraid of me that is why they became quiet all of a sudden after i shouted lol i also always have a pokerface so yeah people are having a hard time tryin to figure me out they can't read me

to tell their parents , show videos of their behaviour either good or bad for their parents to deal with.

ohh that sounds like a good idea...but i think i already did that with words

i was hinting my sis and bro of the things their kids has done i was talking to the kids but the next thing i know my mom got closer and told me to be quiet she just got angry with me for unknown reason and so it happened again but this time it was no longer a blackout but intentional so i just raised my voice not to the point or mid of shouting but almost like talking normally while their grandma is sleeping because she complains about lack of sleep because they were too noisy a while ago with us siblings and the kids are shouting while their grandma is sleeping the door is also open in her room and probably their parents are also sleeping their door is also closed so i also close the door of their grandma a few mins the other kid wakes her mom while gradma also woke up she then steps outside and got angry with me asking why i closed the door i then said the truth she's even more furious qwq she told me to shut up and said this is not your home my sis heard me and she told her kids to be quiet lol i on the other hand take it to the next level because just what happened? why me? what did i do exactly to deserve this so i then raised my voice again(not shouting) and told her i want to go home

but the reality is i can't go home my pregnant sis needed help they haven't even found a replacement for the maid that got pregnant by someone else while on duty and we basically can't search the internet for a maid because instead of a real maid we might lure a syndicate instead

 

[ThePuffyBlob]

the next morning i got kicked out of the house...