I've read that apostasy is a state of rebellion against what you know to be true. That seems illogical to me. In the Army (1965-68), I definitely lost my faith and became an apostate due to biblical teachings that I thought were untrue. If I knew it to be true, why would I not believe it? I was convinced that I only believed in Christianity because, as a child, everyone around me did. I considered it like a child learning colors. Something was only green or blue because that is what I was told. It wasn't until years and many books later that I realized the truth and came to believe in salvation by grace through faith. Peter denied Christ 3 times. I dismissed him several more times than Peter. I'm not sure, but I think that the Holy Spirit (or however you choose to twist it), worked on my heart to help me understand the Gospel. Of course, that only works if you read it.
The bottom line is that I truly believe that my apostasy actually served to strengthen my current acceptance of Christ and his teachings. My disbelief was instrumental in causing me to search for truth deeper than if I had decided that I was comfortable swimming in the lonely circle of atheism. My uneasiness and lack of purpose in atheism drove me to seek a higher truth.
In essence, I believe that my tempoary stint as an apostate fortuitously served to embolden my Christian convictions. I was lost and now I'm found.
The bottom line is that I truly believe that my apostasy actually served to strengthen my current acceptance of Christ and his teachings. My disbelief was instrumental in causing me to search for truth deeper than if I had decided that I was comfortable swimming in the lonely circle of atheism. My uneasiness and lack of purpose in atheism drove me to seek a higher truth.
In essence, I believe that my tempoary stint as an apostate fortuitously served to embolden my Christian convictions. I was lost and now I'm found.