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Father Jim

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Why are Christians such jerks?

Recently a friend of mine started living for the Lord.

After a year of sharing his faith vocally, we had coffee and he told me something he found surprising.
He said that in chess, the pawn pieces are used to advance the more important pieces. They go forward and sacrifice themselves to create opportunities for the Queen, King and Bishop. He thought of himself as a pawn, trying to actively serve the needs of others and serve the kingdom, clear that life isn’t about him.

He said the biggest surprise though was that the more he served and lived a life for Christ, the more he felt attacked. But not by other people, by other Christians. He was confused because he’s never seen a King attack its own pawn in a game of chess. He’d never seen a Bishop take out its own pawn, but the more time he spent in church, the more he got attacked by the people who were supposed to be his fellow brothers and sisters in Christ.

I started to think about that because it’s an issue I keep seeing come up.

A pastor once said, “Nobody is as mean as Christians who are being mean for Jesus.”
I also realized that in my own life I fear sharing difficult ideas less with non-Christians than I do with Christians. Of the two crowds, in the last four years, I’ve experienced much harsher hate from Christians than I have non-Christians.
 

Rita

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I have experienced lack of care within the churches ( and for a number of reasons I withdrew from going a number of years ago ) I have however come across the attitudes you are talking about since being more active on the internet and forum.
I remember years ago feeling like a pawn , but in the wrong way. I also did a study of the chess game and realised that the pawn is a very important piece.
 

amadeus

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Why are Christians such jerks?

Recently a friend of mine started living for the Lord.

After a year of sharing his faith vocally, we had coffee and he told me something he found surprising.
He said that in chess, the pawn pieces are used to advance the more important pieces. They go forward and sacrifice themselves to create opportunities for the Queen, King and Bishop. He thought of himself as a pawn, trying to actively serve the needs of others and serve the kingdom, clear that life isn’t about him.

He said the biggest surprise though was that the more he served and lived a life for Christ, the more he felt attacked. But not by other people, by other Christians. He was confused because he’s never seen a King attack its own pawn in a game of chess. He’d never seen a Bishop take out its own pawn, but the more time he spent in church, the more he got attacked by the people who were supposed to be his fellow brothers and sisters in Christ.

I started to think about that because it’s an issue I keep seeing come up.

A pastor once said, “Nobody is as mean as Christians who are being mean for Jesus.”
I also realized that in my own life I fear sharing difficult ideas less with non-Christians than I do with Christians. Of the two crowds, in the last four years, I’ve experienced much harsher hate from Christians than I have non-Christians.
Mr 6:4But Jesus said unto them, A prophet is not without honour, but in his own country, and among his own kin, and in his own house.
Mr 6:5And he could there do no mighty work, save that he laid his hands upon a few sick folk, and healed them
 

Taken

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I wouldn’t label Christians as jerks.
Everyone has things they are passionate about and are on guard when an other tries to dissuade them, or teach them what has been a topic they have read, studied, learned and practice.

I do consider society promotes some pseudo notion people have a right to not be offended as they are offending an other.

I am aware newbies to Christianity get excited and want to share what they are learning and some times come across as trying to teach and oblivious they are often speaking to a person who learned that 20 years ago.

Just an observance.

Glory to God,
Taken
 
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strepho

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Envy is factor.
I remember heathen tennis player, Becker, who resented Agassi for taking away the spot light. They were both gifted. But Agassi stood out.

Isaiah 66:5 . Hear the word of the Lord, ye that tremble at his word ; Your brethren that hated you, that cast you out for my names sake, said, let the Lord be glorified.

Making advancement in God's word might stir up little jealousy from a brethren.
I'm not judging people.

When Paul converted to christianity, acts chapter 9. The apostles were hesitant to accept Paul.

I believe envy is role.
Or suspicious.

I don't value myself above body of christ. Mabey my approach is too hard line for some brethren.

Some brethren of body of christ are reluctant to tackle certain issues. I think this might why thier might be envy. Or because I made advances in God's word.

I love the body of christ. Humane nature is what it is.
 

St. SteVen

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Blog​


Mar 12, 2020 08:00am

The Sunday Lunch Crowd is the Worst, Take it From Your Server

I’m a Christian currently working in the food industry, so I’m writing this article because it’s extremely important that the church understands how critical the restaurant experience is during Sunday lunch. Several individuals I work with are unbelievers, and what they say about the church crowd is gut-wrenching. They talk about how they hate the church crowds because they are the rudest, most demanding people of the week and don’t tip well.

Shane Pruitt, a Christian Post contributor, interviewed restaurant servers to examine their points of view on the church crowd. His question was, “Generally speaking on Sundays how were you treated by people who had just come from church?” Below are five answers from his article, “When Christians Mistreat Restaurant Servers Right After Worshipping God.”

1. “No one ever wanted to work Sundays because of the church crews. I never understood how they could go to church, but less than 20 minutes after leaving be the worst example of what it means to be a disciple of Jesus.” – Katie

2. “I absolutely hated working on Sundays having to deal with the church crowd. They were always the loudest, most demanding and rudest people, especially when they came in as a group. They would run you like crazy, then leave the most pitiful tip and gospel tract.” – Richard

3. “They did not tip well. You just knew that when you worked the Sunday lunch crowd that you weren’t going to make much.” – Ashton

4. “The neighborhood that I worked in was a wealthy area, and I was a college student at the time and not a believer. When I look back at those Sundays now as a believer, I think there’s not anything in my mind that made the church-goers stand out in a good way. Nothing about them made me want to say, ‘Hmmm . . . maybe I should see what this Jesus thing is all about.’” – Alexis

5. “They never leave the payment until right before darting out only to have the server come to realize they received a low tip, especially for the amount of people, and how long they occupied the table afterwards. On top of that, they’d leave a church flyer or gospel tract behind for the server. This would usually end with the server getting upset and venting to EVERYONE in the back about how crappy church people are and HECK NO none of us will ever go to your church or event!’” – Elizabeth

These are strong words and the two things that stick out are that we’re treating servers like servers and we’re not generous with how we tip.

WE’RE TREATING SERVERS LIKE SERVANTS

The worst thing we can do is treat a server like a servant. We need to treat them as humans instead of objects. These are people with thoughts and feelings, and when we talk at them like they are objects to serve our needs, we are undermining the reality that they are made in God’s image just like we are and should be treated with dignity and respect.

We don’t know their story because we don’t ask, and we don’t pray for them because we don’t care. This mindset needs to change. We need to see them as opportunities to love them and introduce them into the redemptive story of Jesus by how we lovingly treat them and engage them where they are.

In fact, here’s something you probably don’t know. Servers talk trash about their customers ALL the time. I know because I work in the industry. If you’re being rude then your server is probably going back to the kitchen and talking all kinds of trash about you to the rest of the crew. Then what do they do? They come back to your table with a smile and you never knew a thing. Watch your tone of voice and your words when speaking to servers. Your tone needs to be warm and loving, and our words need to be respectful.

Paul says in Colossians, “Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.”

WE’RE NOT GENEROUS WITH OUR TIPS

The second thing that sticks out is that we leave lousy tips. A lousy tip, whether we like it or not, does not glorify God and in fact works against our witness which can take a lot of time to overcome for an unbeliever. The church should be known for radical generosity, and the moment to tip is the moment to share the love and blessings that God has given us. We’re demonstrating our priorities when we tip well. There’s no way we can be greedy and have a positive effect on someone.

Tipping also communicates love. Servers have to work really long hours, and the hours they work are horrible for balancing work and life. Think about it, are they at their dinner table with their family? No, they’re at your dinner table waiting on you and your family. They would give anything to be at home with their families. Trust me, I know.

In addition, servers typically don’t make much money. While it may true that they “need to get a better job” it still doesn’t change the fact that God has placed them right in our path for us to love them. Maybe they can’t get another job. It’s hard to find a good job and we don’t know their story. So, saying “They need to get another job” is a judgmental way of looking at their situation.

Paul says in 2 Corinthians, “Remember this: whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.”

If you’re a Christian you should view where you eat on Sunday as your mission field. Filled with grace and seasoned with love, your conversation with your server needs to be the very thing that points them to (not detracts them from) Christ. You’ve been entrusted with the message of the gospel and you’re preaching with your words and actions every time you sit down at a restaurant table.

Your server likely already has a bad view of the church, so be sure and exercise as much love and wisdom as you can with your conversations and, yes, with your tip.

Source

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St. SteVen

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Why are Christians such jerks?
They believe they are superior to everyone else.

--- PARODY ---

Christian: You should become a Christian.
Victim: Why on earth would I want to do that?
Christian: Huh? What do you mean?
Victim: Christians are the worst people on the planet.
Christian: No, sinners like you are the worst.
Victim: Seriously?
Christian: Yes, that's what the Bible says.
Victim: Doesn't it also say not to judge others?
Christian: I'm not judging you. That will come latter.
Victim: Like when?
Christian: After you die without Christ.
Victim: Are you talking about a forever burning hell?
Christian: Yes, that's where you are going.
Victim: How would you know?
Christian: Again, that's what the Bible says.
Victim: But what do you say?
Christian: I agree with the Bible.
Victim: You are proving my point about why I don't want to be a Christian.
Christian: Why not?
Victim: I don't want to be like you.

Indeed.

/
 

Spyder

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Then again, just because a person claims to follow Christ and to have God's spirit within does not mean it is true. Many attend the social period on "the Lord's day" services for the social interactions or networking. Having once been one of them, I speak from experience.

If the fruit of the spirit is not there, perhaps we should continue to offer forgiveness as to do otherwise would not please God at all. When a "Christian" displays a non-Christlike attitude, it is a bad witness for Christ. I happens - a lot. It was from the example of those who "walked in the Spirt" that caused me to open my mind.

Satan's purpose has been served for thousands of years now. We should stive to make sure of whom we serve. God's judgement at the end of days will not simply be an opinion.
 

Pearl

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I get what the OP is saying because I used to feel bad about wearing earrings at one point. I know a woman who was told God would love her more if she lost weight. My husband was a smoker who gave up and for the last 12 years has vaped and been ridiculed for that and i also get it from some people for being on Facebook and even Christian forums. I wouldn't say these people were 'jerks' as I'm sure they do it with good intentions and because that is their way of thinking I have to live with it.
 

St. SteVen

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I wouldn't say these people were 'jerks' as I'm sure they do it with good intentions and because that is their way of thinking I have to live with it.
I would say... if you "have to live with it", they ARE jerks.

/
 

Wrangler

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I also realized that in my own life I fear sharing difficult ideas less with non-Christians than I do with Christians. Of the two crowds, in the last four years, I’ve experienced much harsher hate from Christians than I have non-Christians.
It may not be hate you are experiencing but accountability from fellow Christians.

A youtube vid said that a friend who lets you vent is not really a friend without holding you accountable for what you can do, what responsibility you have in your own problems.

Our feminized society is all about "understanding" how you feel. Marinating in ones emotions might feel "validating" but is not constructive in the long run.
 
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