Forgiveness

[Pet]

We are told by Jesus, to forgive, as we are forgiven.
He also said that forgiveness is to be from the heart.

So, how do we forgive?

How do we love our enemies?

 

[TLHKAJ]

When you begin to pray for your enemies, God does something in your heart ...and often, He will give you a heart to see them cone to Christ. This has been my experience.

 

[Triumph1300]

He will give you a heart to see them come to Christ.

Absolutely.
But we don't have to agree with them, their behaviour, etc.

 

[Lambano]

We are told by Jesus, to forgive, as we are forgiven.
He also said that forgiveness is to be from the heart.

So, how do we forgive?

How do we love our enemies?

Darned if I know.

 

[Nancy]

Should not the person be repentant for forgiveness? That is what Jesus expects of us.

 

[PGS11]

Forgiveness is the love of God coming from you - you just have to do it.

 

[Bob]

Thank you for the question.

To begin: hold no grudges, bear no ill will, let go of any anger or animosity.

Pray that with the help of the Holy Spirit, we may persuade them to turn to God.

Proverbs 25:
21 If your enemies are hungry, give them food to eat.
If they are thirsty, give them water to drink.
22 You will heap burning coals of shame on their heads,
and the Lord will reward you.

Amen.

 

[Behold]

To begin: hold no grudges, bear no ill will, let go of any anger or animosity.

If your best friend molest's your little boy....... or girl....

So, we are to forgive because we are eternally forgiven, but we are not to forget or not require JUSTICE in these cases.

In cases where the offense is not drastic, then we are to forgive, but we are not to repeat the situation.

There is wisdom in this saying..

"Fool me once shame on YOU...........fool me Twice......shame on ME".

 

[Lambano]

Should not the person be repentant for forgiveness? That is what Jesus expects of us.

This is a good question. It's not cut-and-dried.

The Greek word for "to forgive" is ἀφίημι, "aphiemi", which literally means "to send away" or "to let go". When used of a financial debt, it means exactly that, to let it go with no expectation of repayment. The same concept applies to interpersonal relationships, and Jesus often used the debt model in His parables.

One of the books I read defined "forgiveness" is the attitude that the offense will not stand in the way of restoring the relationship. The restoration of a busted relationship, reconciliation, is a separate (but related) topic.

But it's not cut-and-dried. I don't see how you can have relationships without setting boundaries, and how do you have a continued relationship with someone who continuously violates boundaries?. Sometimes reconciliation is not possible unless the offending person changes their behavior.

 

[Pet]

Darned if I know.

Exactly. I hear churchy people say
"we must forgive, or we won't be forgiven". But, without pretending to, HOW?

 

[Pet]

Forgiveness is the love of God coming from you - you just have to do it.

OK, how?

 

[Pet]

If your best friend molest's your little boy....... or girl....

So, we are to forgive because we are eternally forgiven, but we are not to forget or not require JUSTICE in these cases.

In cases where the offense is not drastic, then we are to forgive, but we are not to repeat the situation.

There is wisdom in this saying..

"Fool me once shame on YOU...........fool me Twice......shame on ME".

I agree with that saying...but...forgiving is forgetting. (Obviously we must avoid the same situations in future)

 

[Pet]

Thank you for the question.

To begin: hold no grudges, bear no ill will, let go of any anger or animosity.

Pray that with the help of the Holy Spirit, we may persuade them to turn to God.

Proverbs 25:
21 If your enemies are hungry, give them food to eat.
If they are thirsty, give them water to drink.
22 You will heap burning coals of shame on their heads,
and the Lord will reward you.

Amen.

So I can hold no grudge, lets pretend for a moment that i can easily do that...then what if the person does something again, And again? etc.

 

[Behold]

I agree with that saying...but...forgiving is forgetting. (Obviously we must avoid the same situations in future)

Forgiving is forgiving , and forgetting is something else.

See, the person we forgive, might just be a clever devil.....and now that they are CAUGHT, they are "oh so sorry and just cry and repent and beg you for forgiveness".......until they do it to you again, or to the next victim.

So, forgive and keep your eyes open..


Now, if you are dealing with a family member, then that is a different situation, but its also not., as of course we are going to try to deal with our own BLOOD in a way that is extra grace inspired......but even then, sometimes someone in a family is just hell bent on being hell bent, and so you sometime have to eject them from your existence......tho forgiven.........and you are not going to forget.

 

[TLHKAJ]

Absolutely.
But we don't have to agree with them, their behaviour, etc.

Of course not. When I came to Christ at age 13, God gave me a burden to see my dad saved. He told me my dad would come to him and I prayed for him for many years. He came to Christ 19 years later ...and passed away within months after. My dad was one of my main abusers. I knew he would come to Christ and be made new, but I wasn't about to bring my children around him. You have to use wisdom.

The same with the family who stole my granddaughter from my daughter (aided by crooked lawyers and judge). I can be eaten up by hatred and rage, or I can focus my anger on satan and pray that they all come to Christ. So that's what I do. That one is more complicated and difficult, but God has many times moved me to earnestly pray for them. (Note, they are all interconnected with the cult and taking my granddaughter was a punishment bc they wanted to make sure they had access to her, which they couldn't so if I was in the picture. So they separated my daughter from me and took the baby.)

I don't agree with or condone any of their actions. But I sure can give satan a black eye and pray they all come to Christ ....and for the protection of my granddaughter and other children in that family.

 

[TLHKAJ]

So I can hold no grudge, lets pretend for a moment that i can easily do that...then what if the person does something again, And again? etc.

You need to disconnect from them. Don't give them any access into your life (if possible). Forgive, disconnect, and pray for them.

 

[TLHKAJ]

I agree with that saying...but...forgiving is forgetting. (Obviously we must avoid the same situations in future)

Is there a scripture that says that you get amnesia when you forgive someone? If I didn't remember what they did, I wouldn't know to keep holding boundaries or how to pray for them. It's kinda the beauty of the whole thing to know they did these things, and yet choose to do them good by praying for them ...or however God leads.

 

[TLHKAJ]

OK, how?

Ask God to heal your hurt and trust Him to do it.
Ask God to give you eyes to see them as He sees them.

 

[TLHKAJ]

Should not the person be repentant for forgiveness? That is what Jesus expects of us.

I think if we take all of Scripture together, we get a bigger picture. When I came to Christ, I was still a child and my dad was still abusing me. And yet, the hatred I had for him washed right away instantly and I saw him as the broken, shattered person he was ...he didn't show signs of remorse till later. And he didn't come to Christ till I was 33 years old ...nearly 20 years gap in when I was saved and forgave him.

With my dad, he needed to see God's love and mercy in action through my actions. It was a continual witness to him of God's willingness to forgive him. And it was a witness to my sister as well who couldn't understand why or how I could forgive him. But it was a natural response of a heart transformed by the immense love of God He poured over and into my heart. That moved me to love him and forgive and pray for him.

I don't think God would have worked that way in my situation if we had to wait till they say they're sorry.

 

[TLHKAJ]

Forgiveness is the love of God coming from you - you just have to do it.

This is true. But perhaps the first step is to open our own hearts to God's love toward us. When we experience His love, hearts change ... that love flows out to others, and actions naturally follow.