As a survivor of severe trauma from birth, I can tell you there is hope in Christ. Healing is most often a process. Allow the Lord Jesus to guide your steps. He can heal each and every trauma you have experienced. Life won't be perfect and there are ups and downs while we live on this side of eternity, but He has better things for you ....I promise!
As far as struggling to open your Bible ....maybe get the Word in, in other ways ...24/7 audio bible on YT (even turn it on while you're going to sleep at night ...scripture music, online sermons. Pray and trust God will bring you through this. He will strengthen you.
Do things that build joy ....time outside in nature, time with pets, watching an old funny movie ....enjoying a hobby ....laugh as often as possible.