MY 2ND HAPPIEST DAY
Between my 2nd and 3rd year in seminary I was working in the Grand Canyon Tourist Center during the week and was hired to preach on Sundays at the altar by the natural colosseum at the rim's edge. I lived near the Grand Canyon Airport 9 miles from the South Rim village. One day, I was having lunch with Bad Water Bill in the local restaurant when I mentioned that I'd like to hike down and up the canyon. Several men overheard me and warned me that I was too fair to survive the hike and that an eastern city slicker like me had died trying the previous year. This hurt my pride. So I brashly announced that I would run down and up the canyon. Everyone laughed and that made me mad. So I coldly replied, "Come and watch me!" They winked at each other and decided to call my bluff; so a caravan of gawkers went to the Kaibab Trail to watch me back out of my alleged 16 mile run. I brought no water and had done no prior running in preparation.
To their dismay I sprinted down the trail to shouts of "Suicide!" and covered the 7-mile trip down to the Colorado River in 1 hour and 25 minutes. On the way, I had a scare: I saw an ascending mule train and their leader screamed at me to stop, but I couldn't because my feet were locked in perpetual motion. So I had to trip myself and received some well deserved dirty looks as the mule train passed by. On the way up, I learned an important lesson: it's easier to run down a canyon than to run up it! Duh! But I covered 12.6 miles down and up to Indian Garden in 2 hours and 25 minutes with just 3 1/2 miles to go.
By then I was badly dehydrated and noticed a water spigot at Indian Gardens. So I must have drunk a gallon of water. Of course that gave me cramps so bad that I had to pick up my legs with my hands to complete the additional 3 1/2 miles up. I had completed 12.6 miles in 2 hours and 25 minutes and the world record for the whole 16 mile trek was 3 1/2 hours. But now, cramped up, my ego was shattered by an elderly Indian lady who shouted, "Move aside, sonny, I'm in a hurry!" When I got to the top, I ordered a large meal at the Bright Angel Lodge, but couldn't eat it. The waiter realized why and I didn't have to pay for that dinner.
After showering in my trailer, I went to the cafe where a wedding reception was going on. There were beautiful young women who had heard of my boast to run down and up the canyon, and they wanted to have some fun with the canyon preacher. So one by one they sat on my lap and put their arms around me. That was wonderfully embarrassing because my legs were so weakened by my run that they shook. These young women found that hilarious and that got me more similar attention, but to my horror, some of them didn't believe my explanation that I had actually run down and up the canyon!
As foolish and risky as this adventurous day was, I was ecstatic that I had actually run most of the way and survived. The views of course were breath-taking. And all the female attention I got at the wedding reception was fabulous too. It seemed in retrospect that the whole day had really been several days. I have never felt so alive in my life, despite the risky folly, and often relive that day, the 2nd happiest of my life.
