I’m also sorry to hear about your current situation. That would be tough. The most regret I have of not being told sooner before my biological passed: Was not being able to tell him I’m okay and I don’t hate him. the one thing I’ve been told is he was born out of wed-lock and never knew who his parents were. My mother said he spoke about being a “bastard” child which was very condemning to him (or I’ve been told it was). My mother said it was a one time thing between them as he had a family also and how he had tricked her by telling her he could no longer have children. When finding out about me and seeing me once...he decided to not stick around. She questions now all these years later why he would lie. It doesn’t seem too odd to me that maybe he subconsciously somehow thought he could fix something broken in his own life but then ultimately couldn’t face it. I have three brothers(two are twins) which I’ve never met. And a sister. I’ve met the sister. She told me her entire life she longed for a sister so desperately (almost obsessively)that her father brought a little girl to live with them for years and later the girl was moved out and gone. When I told her who I was she screamed and cried in shock; genuinely not knowing. She said something was always missing in their family. Only told you this to let you know... even if you are not aware and the family you have never known are not aware...you’re not being there surely has had some impact. probably more than you know in the minds of those who know. thank you for sharing something so personal with us. surely there are others who can relate since not many families are perfect. Blessings and yes ...We do have a Father.
Thanks also for your sympathy, and kind words and your sharing of this also. I'm so sorry to hear of your bio's passing as well; this is heartbreaking, just hearing about this. I hope your newfound relationship with your sister continues to build, and possibly can meet your brothers as well. I also hope all in or around your life are In Christ.
I'm with you on not being told sooner, and before any passing on occurs. It's not our fault though, which isn't to assign any blame, but moreso to lessen the guilt and/or sadness we have, I guess.
In my case, my "brother" died a couple of years ago, and my "mom" told me in the months before she passed of cancer last year. It was really bad timing. Not that it would've changed anything, but the timing of it was horrible considering the caretaking for the already horrible decaying of "mom". I don't consider it a lie, just not the whole truth - whatever their reasons were, they're still family. But like I said, I can't deny there is more out there, to me. Just not sure what that entails - I'm still working through all of this; still fresh.
Yeah it's all a mess, even before I found all this out. My "mom" and "dad" divorced because my "sister" "is"/was/? my half-sibling; "mom" had cheated. Heh, I don't even know how to write these relationships anymore - "sister" who was a "half-sibling" is now not even a little bit "sister" yet still sister...lol
