Honoring your father and mother no matter what is dumb

[aspen]

Honoring your father and mother is important - i believe it is a call to honor the the traditions we are raised with, but....

There comes a point when we are called to hate our father and mother - challenge the traditions we were raised with and take what we can make our own and leave the rest.

We are always called to love our parents.

 

[GodsGrace]

I completely a hundred percent believe God answers our prayers, even when time seems to say otherwise. Is your mother saved? You don't have to answer but consider it. Would she hurt you so if she had any insight. God gives us insight. Because of God, I am able to see the truth that my mother has always searched for love in all the wrong places and has never experienced real love which only God can give. My biological Father passed never conquering alcoholism or coming to terms with the truth that, he also was a bastard child. Those that don't know God seriously know no other way. My mother mocks my relationship with God, even when I tell her it was My Heavenly Father that decided when I could handle the truth coming out. That He did what was good for me when I needed it. I am able to take my mother's comments and bitterness because God has clearly shown me it all stems from the lack of Him.

So, don't assume an almighty God has lost control of how you are treated. Please don't assume He does not care. Don't assume He is not using how YOU honor Him by doing one of the most difficult things for you to do. Even if it makes no sense whatsoever, He IS God and sees and knows what you do to honor Him...even if it doesn't give you the results you want. I have had prayers that took ten years to be answered. God began working on those prayers when I asked them. And here's the kicker...I have only had a relationship, a real committed relationship with Him for a few years. Before that there was no relationship, only a handful of mumbled prayers when I needed something fixed. He has answered those half-hearted mumbled prayers from a decade ago. God was working when I did not even know who He is. And He is working all things for your good also, for His plan and will for you.

Something else that has greatly helped me get past hurtful things. Think of all the diversity of species God has created: all that is in the ocean, all the weird looking birds, the monkeys with hairless butts(those make me laugh)...this God, Creator of all diversity, the ONE true living God...He knows YOU. HE cares about YOU and loves YOU, and approves of you, and not for one second is He going to ask you to do something that is "dumb". He knows what we don't know(which is a lot). Really think about who He is, and who we belong to. So what if others say or do hurtful things to us...it becomes minor in light of Him.

I have to add: what is it to be a child of God? Isn't the "overcoming" in offering love where it is not deserved? Isn't that the action of God that changed everything in: He offered love to the undeserving.

Which is all.

What great posts...

 

[Helen]

Brock, I have struggled with this commandment- not for myself. Oh I have issues with my dad, and sometimes it is hard to respect what he says and has done but I have come to realise that no one is perfect and I do have love for him. He is now 87 and I am his carer, so I let many things go over my head, I do not respect his attitudes at times.
However I have often wondered how children cope with this verse when they have been sexually abused by their fathers, or beaten ect.
I have never really been able to figure that one out - it has always raised questions in my mind and I have been a Christian for nearly About 35 years.
Now it doesn't mean I do not think the commandments are not relevant, or untrue, ect but I just convey that in all honesty I too struggle to understand how some are able to comply to it.
Thank goodness we have a God who understands and knows everything about us, and is equally able to understand our doubts and questions about things.
I am very grateful that I have the respect of all my four children - but I am sure when they were teenagers they had completely different views about me as a mum
Butterfly

Hey there

Don't you think this is where God makes the different between respect and forgiveness .
Respect is earned, parents or not...forgivness is owed always , while there is yet breath. God does not give us a choice.
I often quote to myself and others..."Unforgivness is like drinking poison and then waiting for the other person to drop dead.." It is ourselves that inwardly rot away.

There is a person in our family that I can love because God put him into our family to be loved. I can pray for him ...I can care how he is doing, I can be sorry for him that he is as mean and unkind as he is...God's Spirit gives that ability, but in no why can I or will I respect him. Forgive I must, respect is earned not born into!!

I believe with our parents re this thread...honour means pray for, cherish and care for..( forgive , which is often needed) ...I do not see any command to whatever to respect them.

 

[Helen]

<snip>
Besides being a mother and a father, parents are also humans. Kids don't realize this till they're a lot older.

My father passed away at the age of 87. He had alzheimer's and died of that so you could imagine. I took care of him in my home till the end. I became also his nurse, learning how to care for him so he could stay at home.
I may have respected him very little when I was a teen, but I honored him in the end.

We should all honor our parents and the life they gave up for us...
even if we DO NOT respect them.

I think the above where I made you post bold , is a perfect picture of honouring a parent!
I happen to get on well with both mine. Like you I cared for my dad 24/7 at home...right until the very last breath...he was 90.
They were not perfect, but gave what they could with what they had..both came from strange victorian families ...so both were 'damaged'...yet were given to us kids to be our parents...

I think you nailed "honour" here.
( that is honour with a U LOL )

 

[GodsGrace]

I think the above where I made you post bold , is a perfect picture of honouring a parent!
I happen to get on well with both mine. Like you I cared for my dad 24/7 righ

Yes BG, I think they should be honored no matter what.
One way is to care for them when the time comes,,,if possible.

 

[Helen]

Yes BG, I think they should be honored no matter what.
One way is to care for them when the time comes,,,if possible.

LOL I some how hit the Post button before I was finished my post...the rest had to be added after you posted !!

 

[GodsGrace]

LOL I some how hit the Post button before I was finished my post...the rest had to be added after you posted !!

I just finished reading it.
Same situation here.
Parents could only do their best,,,whatever that is.
And I get about the U!

 

[Butterfly]

Hey there

Don't you think this is where God makes the different between respect and forgiveness .
Respect is earned, parents or not...forgivness is owed always , while there is yet breath. God does not give us a choice.
I often quote to myself and others..."Unforgivness is like drinking poison and then waiting for the other person to drop dead.." It is ourselves that inwardly rot away.

There is a person in our family that I can love because God put him into our family to be loved. I can pray for him ...I can care how he is doing, I can be sorry for him that he is as mean and unkind as he is...God's Spirit gives that ability, but in no why can I or will I respect him. Forgive I must, respect is earned not born into!!

I believe with our parents re this thread...honour means pray for, cherish and care for..( forgive , which is often needed) ...I do not see any command to whatever to respect them.

Hi Helen,
Yes, I agree- but I do still wonder about children who are beaten or abused, it still must be a difficult process to forgive and honour. I guess I was just being honest in admitting that I struggle to see how hard it can be in some situations. Xxx
Rita x

 

[Helen]

Hi Helen,
Yes, I agree- but I do still wonder about children who are beaten or abused, it still must be a difficult process to forgive and honour. I guess I was just being honest in admitting that I struggle to see how hard it can be in some situations. Xxx
Rita x

Oh I totally agree...if we navel gaze too much we get depressed...I could do that easily! We humans live in the world of Fair and UnFair... right and wrong..we ate of that tree when we were 'in Adam' ...therefore we judge by right and wrong...which the Devil likes to use to trip us up. God moves in the realm Life (and death)
Often life seems unfair...the great question..Why did some of us have a reasonably 'normal' life and others didn't?
Even personality-wise some of us are disadvantaged right out of the gate.
My best friend ( from Texas) has a happy-go-lucky personality...while I on the other hand could easily let myself brood if I don't take command of that temptation. I also can worry easily, which is another 'overcoming' for me to resist steadfastly. I remember get mad at her once saying- " It's not fair, I am always having to overcome my stupid negative personality and choose God's way...while you just bob along in life, you never worry, you never get 'under a situation', you are always positive..when we finally get to heaven you will have no baggage and a big crown of glory... I will have lots to leave at the Door.."

But that is life...I think I was born a brooder...I remember being introverted at about age 6 ..so I was all behind from the beginning!!!!!

Non of us know the why's or wherefore of God...but we Trust Him, so we know He always "Has a Plan...and it will be GOOD!!

 

[Taken]

The belief that God commands us to honor our parents no matter what is so false.

No, it is not false.

Regard and Treat parents with Respect which is synonymous with Honor.

That does not mean they are Respectable, Honorable, Forthright, Honest, Upright....or that your Standing With the Lord is the same as theirs.

However it does mean they have a position in your life, that you are Upright when you respect their Them according to Their Position as your Parent.

The Lord does not preface to Love only those that Love you, or do well to only those that do well unto you.
However the Lord does preface to Honor your parents, as your parents, whether or not you agree with them or like them.

It is a foreshadow. One day one will have no earthly parents, but hopefully one will have a Heavenly Father, and Honor is also due Him...
Even when one is tested, may not agree, may not understand, may not like.....the Honor and Respect is taught to remain constant.

God Bless,
Taken