The first problem solved on earth was not that of sin, but of being alone ( Gen. 2:18). After nine instances of the Hebrew tov (good) in the Creation and Eden story, there is finally something that is lo-tov (not good) in Paradise. “It is not good that the man should be alone” ( Gen. 2:18).
Interestingly, the phrase lo-tov (not good) is not invoked again until Jethro admonishes Moses. Again, the issue surrounds aloneness. The burden of the people is too heavy for Moses. So Jethro bluntly says, “ ‘What you are doing is not good. . . . You are not able to do it alone’ ” ( Exod. 18:17, 18, ESV). Reality, especially after sin’s entrance, is often too overwhelming to bear alone. Nor is it in God’s blueprint for humanity that we do so.
Aloneness in Eden was more than the loneliness that we have all experienced at some point, though it includes it. Adam’s aloneness in some ways is closer to that of being isolated on an island deprived of human engagement of any kind. Given that Eve also was created on the sixth day, Adam’s experience of being the sole human on earth was brief but just long enough to accentuate his appreciation of his newly created companion.
All too often the story of Adam and Eve is reduced to a commentary on marriage. The aspect of being alone that it contains is relegated exclusively to the singleness of unmarried life. But Eve’s creation didn’t solve a singleness problem. It solved a human aloneness problem. Eve was not only a wife; she was friend, coworker (Gen. 1:28), spiritual companion, and the locus of Adam’s social life, as he was to hers. This fact is good news for the unmarried. Many may have been burdened by the divine proclamation “It is not good that the man should be alone” ( Gen. 2:18) and received it as a virtual condemnation of single life. Not true. We may be single and yet not be alone, because of the human presence of family, friends, and acquaintances at our homes, churches, and places of work.
Aloneness also rears its head in the temptation and Fall. There is disagreement among scholars as to whether Adam was present with Eve during the serpent’s temptation. The argument that he was present revolves around two points: the text speaking of Eve’s eating the fruit and giving some to her husband “with her” ( Gen. 3:6) and the serpent using plural verbs as if he is talking to more than one person. In support of Adam’s absence, he is conspicuously absent from the dialogue, and appears neither as the subject or object of any sentence in the narration.
There is an exclusive verbal volley between Eve and the serpent: “He [the serpent] said unto the woman” ( Gen. 3:1, 4) and “The woman said unto the serpent” ( Gen. 3:2). The controversial phrase “with her” can be understood in a relational rather than spatial context as in the way Adam retold events to God, “The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat” ( Gen. 3:12). Obviously, “with me” in Adam’s words means “with me as my companion,” and “with her” in the narrator’s words likely means the same thing. As far as the serpent using plural verbs and pronouns, this diction shows that Satan’s target was both Adam and Eve. The use of plurals would make it all the more surprising that Adam didn’t speak up if he were indeed there. For a brief study of the subject, see Elias Brasil de Souza, Was Adam With Eve at the Scene of Temptation? A Short Note on “With Her” in Genesis 3:6. Just as aloneness was not ideal at Creation, it was a liability in temptation.
We can conclude that “it was not good for the woman” to be alone either. Could the Fall have been prevented simply by Adam and Eve staying together? Perhaps so. Ellen G. White says, “The angels had cautioned Eve to beware of separating herself from her husband while occupied in their daily labor in the garden; with him she would be in less danger from temptation than if she were alone.”—Patriarchs and Prophets, p. 53. A faith community, even if it consists of two people, provides spiritual strength and accountability.
When the Lord approached Adam and Eve after their sin, they did one of the most disappointing yet profound actions in Scripture: they “hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God” ( Gen. 3:8). Sin created a self-damaging condition: a desire to live alone without God.
But He is not so easily deterred, and the prophetic pleas of the Hebrew prophets testify to that fact. God culminated His pursuit of lost humanity with the Incarnation of His Son Immanuel, God with us ( Matt. 1:23).
The Incarnation echoes the Eden account. After sin has ravaged the world, God sees that it is “not good” for man to “be alone” ( Gen. 2:18); so He sends a “helper,” one “corresponding to” him.—Patriarchs and Prophets, p. 46. The word for “helper” in the Septuagint (Greek translation of the Old Testament) in Genesis 2:18 (boethos) is the same word in Hebrews 13:6: “The Lord is my helper.” But instead of succumbing to the “serpent’s” temptations ( Matt. 4:1–11), Jesus “resisted to the point of shedding [His] blood” ( Heb. 12:4, ESV), so that one day we could all hear a “great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God” ( Rev. 21:3), never to be alone again.
Reflection
Some have wondered, “If God is so great, why isn’t His companionship sufficient to meet all of Adam’s needs, precluding the necessity for the creation of another?” It’s a question worth pondering, but experience shows that the question can be turned on its head. The fact that God is all-sufficient for us individually anticipates and prepares us to enter into relationships with others. In this way, our approach to human relationships will come from a posture of wholeness rather than from one of neediness or desperation. Often others, especially romantic partners, are unconsciously pursued to fill needs that only the Creator can satisfy. Best to have the water that, once taken, Jesus says will prevent one from ever being thirsty again ( John 4:14, ESV). Why? Because it becomes a “spring of water” in the individual. Jesus and/or His message is that water.
Without it, relationships can become skewed, or worse, idolatrous. The previous insight is at the root of handling the various aloneness scenarios in the lesson: being unmarried, losing a spouse to divorce or death, being spiritually single. The specific way of handling these diverse experiences is unique. Though they can be extremely difficult, they are made bearable by the knowledge that we have a God who is present ( Acts 17:27), who sees what we are going through ( Gen. 16:13), and who promises never to leave us ( Deut. 31:6, Matt. 28:20).
