Need advice: Im afraid of not being busy

[dev553344]

I called on the Lord for direction and He gave me a couple verses:

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you...

...Whosoever shall lose his life for my sake shall find it...


What I'm not getting from the Lord is direction towards anything outside of the home. No church ministry. No volunteering. No nothing. No job. And I have accepted that Im not called to have a traditional career.

It's as if God wants me to just be a disciple and wife and nothing else. He's not given me what my routine will look like and I am really struggling with that.

I'm afraid of being a bum. I'm afraid of not having much to say when people ask me what I do. I'm afraid of not being busy with tasks.

In America, we tend to wear busyness like a badge of honor. In a way, though I was less busy than most, I did too. So now it feels like spiritual contortion to just wait on God and learn from Jesus without a plan of action or outside commitments.

I suffer from all of that. Being disabled is a trial. Not feeling like I am accomplished anymore. Not having things to talk about cause I just work on physics. And pretty much nobody understands me when I talk physics.

You could use this time for personal reflection also. As long as it's not having a negative effect on your relationships.

Hope you find what works for you. Feeling restless? I think that's natural when there is not much to do.

 

[Pearl]

The Church needs both Marthas and Marys and it seems this is your time to be a Mary @Wynona. xx

 

[DuckieLady]

I called on the Lord for direction and He gave me a couple verses:

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you...

...Whosoever shall lose his life for my sake shall find it...


What I'm not getting from the Lord is direction towards anything outside of the home. No church ministry. No volunteering. No nothing. No job. And I have accepted that Im not called to have a traditional career.

It's as if God wants me to just be a disciple and wife and nothing else. He's not given me what my routine will look like and I am really struggling with that.

I'm afraid of being a bum. I'm afraid of not having much to say when people ask me what I do. I'm afraid of not being busy with tasks.

In America, we tend to wear busyness like a badge of honor. In a way, though I was less busy than most, I did too. So now it feels like spiritual contortion to just wait on God and learn from Jesus without a plan of action or outside commitments.

I got a "not yet " once when I was a SAHM and prayed for a job and it wasn't very reassuring to me because I felt like I *had* to be doing something. It felt pretty stagnant.

The best thing I can say is it wasn't wasted time. I had a good foundation built on Christ alone. It wasn't a good situation but God carried me and he was faithful, and he supplied everything I needed, including a good job and a home.

Sometimes He just wants us to trust Him and His timing.

 

[DuckieLady]

I really need to add @Wynona the things I was doing at the time that I felt were sort if worthless knowledge for the modern world, ended up being applicable qualities for my job and life.

I was baking in a toaster oven because it was all I had and sometimes bread was all I could afford to make... Now I'm baking all day.

Budgeting and knowing how much something would cost, I need that. If I wanted to make something new, have to figure out how much something costs per item to know how to make a profit.

All those homemaker skills from organization, budgeting, baking, cleaning, friendly service and hospitality, creativity, resourcefulness, ended up being the same skills I needed.

Perhaps it will be the same for you.

 

[Wynona]

These past few days Ive been happy as if Ive forgotten that I wanted to feel more important by doing things outside the house.

When I wake up, that's when my husband is still asleep and I spend time with God. Ive been working hard on thanking Him in all circumstances. Maybe that's whats helping me.

It's also helpful that my husband isn't satisfied unless I make some of the recipes I mastered. He has a way of loving to be taken care of that is helpful. Im not sure what Id do if He wanted to do everything himself.

His happiness is something that Im a big part of. So theres a huge benefit in being at home.

 

[Wynona]

God has asked me to let go of the desire to appear busy to others.

Ive been using that to prove to myself that Im not a bum at the cost of not always waiting on God for direction.

The disciples left their jobs to be with Jesus. God reminded me that work and business is not good for its own sake and I have need of simplicity in my life. Simply to seek first the Kingdom of God.

But its not easy. The temptation to pick the anxiety back up and feel like Im not enough is immense.

 

[farouk]

Hi @Wynona Prayer and the Scriptures if pursued daily and diligently will soon reveal ways you can indeed keep busy..........

 

[Wrangler]

God has asked me to let go of the desire to appear busy to others.

Ive been using that to prove to myself that Im not a bum at the cost of not always waiting on God for direction.

The disciples left their jobs to be with Jesus. God reminded me that work and business is not good for its own sake and I have need of simplicity in my life. Simply to seek first the Kingdom of God.

But its not easy. The temptation to pick the anxiety back up and feel like Im not enough is immense.

I now believe it is the work of Satan to rob us of God's peace by keeping us busy all the time - and feeling we are not DOING enough.

 

[dev553344]

God has asked me to let go of the desire to appear busy to others.

Ive been using that to prove to myself that Im not a bum at the cost of not always waiting on God for direction.

The disciples left their jobs to be with Jesus. God reminded me that work and business is not good for its own sake and I have need of simplicity in my life. Simply to seek first the Kingdom of God.

But its not easy. The temptation to pick the anxiety back up and feel like Im not enough is immense.

It's always nice to hear from you. I watch church everyday online and that fills me with daily peace.

 

[Wynona]

In my prayer time, Jesus said something to me I didn't quite agree with at first:

"You have need of simplicity."

I was afraid of slowing down and living the life I was called to live because I was afraid it wasn't enough. I felt guilty for being well rested in a world where being stressed is like a badge of honor.

But God has slowed down my dreams and my frantic desires for constant accomplishments and instead given me a life of rest, service, and freedom to be creative.

The things that the world esteem aren't nearly as important to God.

Instead of feeling stuck and afraid, I think God has shown me a different path of being content and creative, rather than constantly needing more and more. God is seems to be pointing to a life of slow intentional living and now I can see that that's a wonderful thing. It's nothing to be ashamed of at all.

 

[Pearl]

I was afraid of slowing down and living the life I was called to live because I was afraid it wasn't enough. I felt guilty for being well rested in a world where being stressed is like a badge of honor.

Yes, there is where the problem lies. We get into all sorts of a mess if we try to live as the world lives.

 

[stunnedbygrace]

I called on the Lord for direction and He gave me a couple verses:

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you...

...Whosoever shall lose his life for my sake shall find it...


What I'm not getting from the Lord is direction towards anything outside of the home. No church ministry. No volunteering. No nothing. No job. And I have accepted that Im not called to have a traditional career.

So you had hoped for direction of something you can “do” for God, but His direction for you was not what you had hoped for. It sounds like He’s saying you have to stop wondering and worrying what you can do for Him and is telling you to just seek Him and He will lead you rather than you doing something. It sounds like He’s leading you to death so you CAN then be of use to Him by His filling you with His own life to impart to others.
Focus on what He has told you is His will. It will lead (in a way that seems excruciatingly slow to us sometimes) to His being able to use you without your flesh in the way mucking it up.
He answered you. Now focus on that. Remember, only one of the blind men healed returned to Him. The others ran off yelling in excitement that their blindness had been healed and did not return. And remember that He healed a blind man in two stages. At first, he saw dimly, but in the second stage he saw clearly.

 

[Lambano]

What I'm not getting from the Lord is direction towards anything outside of the home. No church ministry. No volunteering. No nothing.

Well, you know what they say about idle hands…

I’m kidding, I’m kidding!

But I will give a contrarian point of view: If you’re being prompted to find a ministry outside the home but not being given specific directions, look into some of the opportunities in your new location and see if anything really clicks, like “Oh, THIS is what God wanted me to do. He just wanted me to do the legwork first.”

 

[Wynona]

So you had hoped for direction of something you can “do” for God, but His direction for you was not what you had hoped for. It sounds like He’s saying you have to stop wondering and worrying what you can do for Him and is telling you to just seek Him and He will lead you rather than you doing something. It sounds like He’s leading you to death so you CAN then be of use to Him by His filling you with His own life to impart to others.
Focus on what He has told you is His will. It will lead (in a way that seems excruciatingly slow to us sometimes) to His being able to use you without your flesh in the way mucking it up.
He answered you. Now focus on that. Remember, only one of the blind men healed returned to Him. The others ran off yelling in excitement that their blindness had been healed and did not return. And remember that He healed a blind man in two stages. At first, he saw dimly, but in the second stage he saw clearly.

You are right @stunnedbygrace. It has been more of a season of seeking the Lord and waiting on Him. Accepting God's will for me was really hard. But I don't want to keep building on the sand.

 

[stunnedbygrace]

You are right @stunnedbygrace. It has been more of a season of seeking the Lord and waiting on Him. Accepting God's will for me was really hard. But I don't want to keep building on the sand.

You might be surprised (I was) at how many verses talk of waiting on God. Most have a promise attached!

 

[dev553344]

These past few days Ive been happy as if Ive forgotten that I wanted to feel more important by doing things outside the house.

When I wake up, that's when my husband is still asleep and I spend time with God. Ive been working hard on thanking Him in all circumstances. Maybe that's whats helping me.

It's also helpful that my husband isn't satisfied unless I make some of the recipes I mastered. He has a way of loving to be taken care of that is helpful. Im not sure what Id do if He wanted to do everything himself.

His happiness is something that Im a big part of. So theres a huge benefit in being at home.

Sometimes our calling is for the family. We should attend church if we can, but sometimes that's all God requires of us. Serving family can bring the Love, Peace and Joy of the Lord's Holy Spirit.

I visit with family now as sort of my calling in life, and that brings me peace and love. And that's about all I can do for now.

 

[Wynona]

Well, you know what they say about idle hands…

I’m kidding, I’m kidding!

But I will give a contrarian point of view: If you’re being prompted to find a ministry outside the home but not being given specific directions, look into some of the opportunities in your new location and see if anything really clicks, like “Oh, THIS is what God wanted me to do. He just wanted me to do the legwork first.”

I had a lot of fun doing that in the past. Volunteering at the crisis pregnancy center was better than I could have imagined.

I just hear God saying to wait over and over at this point. That there's reward in it. I think He has something for me to do. I just need to be patient.