I know that where ever I walk the Lord holds my hand. But I am feeling very weak. I feel so alone. I know that he is holding my hand right at this moment as I type. But I still feel so alone.
I feel that I have dug a hole that I can't escape. I feel the dirt collapsing in on me. I am so close to being able to move out from here but she is so POISONESS that it feels almost impossible. No not almost impossible, it truly feels like she is being led by satan and I by The Lord Our God.
Every turn I try to take to escape she shuts it down. Now it's my long time dog. He is the closest being to me other than the Lord. She has her name on the papers for him and says I cant have him if I leave.
It's truly like satan is using this, I PRAY, soon to be ex wife is trying to kill any hope of me having a happy life. I do not want this woman. I do not hate her. I pray for her DAILY to have her heart become soft and work this divorce out.
I am at the point now that I feel totally helpless. Everywhere I turn she spins it into her owning it and I cant have it.
IN 23 YEARS SHE NEVER HAD A JOB! It is all MY money that bought anything.
This situation I've allowed is the most difficult situation that I've ever been in in all my life. Granted the Lord has protected me from any difficult situations in the past, but this is driving me insane.
I am in No Way Suicidal as I and you all realize that we must depend on God to lead us through this darkness and suicide is not an answer and in His eyes not tolerable. I have way to much happiness to reap in the future as I have sown good crops.
It just really got ugly today. I really think that satan is driving her spirit. She speaks that she is Christian yet curses many people, never forgives, cheats, steals. I see all this. She hides it from me as I just pray for her. But she just seems to be getting darker and darker.
I am just so broken at this point. I know that the Lord will not give us more than we can handle. But Guess What?.....Dear Lord My God, I profess to You and all that read this that I can't take much more. I feel I'm at my breaking point.
What does that mean? That means just getting in my car with the 400 that I have saved and leaving all behind and just driving South. South because I will be sleeping in my car.
Maybe thats what the Lord wants me to do. I have no idea as I am so lost and empty except for when I am praying. And believe me my prayer barely ever stops. Thats why I know He hears me.
Good Lord My God I wish I could hear You!
Just please pray for me. Please pray for God to lead me down His road as I am truly lost and hurting. Broken.
I am truly a loving and caring soul. Just so Broken at this point.
I feel that I have dug a hole that I can't escape. I feel the dirt collapsing in on me. I am so close to being able to move out from here but she is so POISONESS that it feels almost impossible. No not almost impossible, it truly feels like she is being led by satan and I by The Lord Our God.
Every turn I try to take to escape she shuts it down. Now it's my long time dog. He is the closest being to me other than the Lord. She has her name on the papers for him and says I cant have him if I leave.
It's truly like satan is using this, I PRAY, soon to be ex wife is trying to kill any hope of me having a happy life. I do not want this woman. I do not hate her. I pray for her DAILY to have her heart become soft and work this divorce out.
I am at the point now that I feel totally helpless. Everywhere I turn she spins it into her owning it and I cant have it.
IN 23 YEARS SHE NEVER HAD A JOB! It is all MY money that bought anything.
This situation I've allowed is the most difficult situation that I've ever been in in all my life. Granted the Lord has protected me from any difficult situations in the past, but this is driving me insane.
I am in No Way Suicidal as I and you all realize that we must depend on God to lead us through this darkness and suicide is not an answer and in His eyes not tolerable. I have way to much happiness to reap in the future as I have sown good crops.
It just really got ugly today. I really think that satan is driving her spirit. She speaks that she is Christian yet curses many people, never forgives, cheats, steals. I see all this. She hides it from me as I just pray for her. But she just seems to be getting darker and darker.
I am just so broken at this point. I know that the Lord will not give us more than we can handle. But Guess What?.....Dear Lord My God, I profess to You and all that read this that I can't take much more. I feel I'm at my breaking point.
What does that mean? That means just getting in my car with the 400 that I have saved and leaving all behind and just driving South. South because I will be sleeping in my car.
Maybe thats what the Lord wants me to do. I have no idea as I am so lost and empty except for when I am praying. And believe me my prayer barely ever stops. Thats why I know He hears me.
Good Lord My God I wish I could hear You!
Just please pray for me. Please pray for God to lead me down His road as I am truly lost and hurting. Broken.
I am truly a loving and caring soul. Just so Broken at this point.
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