I am hearing you since 2008! On the old (gone) forum, it's where we met. Let's go there and reason a couple plies deeper. There you testified you fell from grace after living a life without sin for 2 years. One small moment of recklessness and there you went, in tears, in pain, devastated, one big trauma as a result. And there was another person also preaching sinless perfection who also fell from grace and sinned, that drama was even bigger, seeking penance, even fearing the Lord's rejection. Both of you needed a long period of healing. Remember ?
So, what is it that in a split second your Christian life, your faith can fall into pieces and cause such great stress, a trauma you need to heal from. Have you already figured it out?
Me then, living a holy life, so it felt. Then after a decade the good Lord opened my eyes, pride, I walked in pride, one of the worst sins. And it went as it went with you, tears, in pain, devastated, one big trauma as a result, And needed a long period to overcome.
So why was I so hurt, I repented, was forgiven, but the pain remained, why? And I could not figure it out in that time, that needed another decade or was it 2 decades, could be.
Paul then, Romans 7, Paul experienced the same,
Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?
What have these cases in common, why the
disappointment, why the pain ?
Right,
I was disappointed in myself, not able to live a holy and sinless life. In other words, the good Lord just opened my eyes I lived a prideful life and then my reaction is another form of pride,
disappointed in myself! as if I am able to live a sinless life without Christ! So I can echo Paul
wretched man that I am! A selfish ego sinner and great lesson from the Lord to know what I am.
Where you too disappointed in yourself at the time you fell from grace after 2 years of living without sin?
Just curious.