The happy thread
- Thread starter djstav
- Start date
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Behold
Well-Known Member
A criminal with a long record of transgressions was on trial for his latest crime. The jury found him guilty on 33 counts and the judge sentenced him to 189 years. Realizing that even with time off for good behavior he would be over one hundred when he was released, the prisoner burst into tears.
Noting this display of remorse, the judge reconsidered...... He said, “I didn’t mean to be so severe. Thinking it over, I can see that I’ve imposed an extremely harsh sentence. So you don’t have to serve the whole time.” The prisoner beamed with new found hope until the judge leaned toward him and said........... “Just do a much as you can.”
Noting this display of remorse, the judge reconsidered...... He said, “I didn’t mean to be so severe. Thinking it over, I can see that I’ve imposed an extremely harsh sentence. So you don’t have to serve the whole time.” The prisoner beamed with new found hope until the judge leaned toward him and said........... “Just do a much as you can.”
Behold
Well-Known Member
Church Bulletin Bloopers
“For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.”
“The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church.”
“The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession.”
“Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 p.m. Please use the back door.”
“Anointing of the sick … If you are going to be hospitalized for an operation, contact the pastor. Special prayer also for those who are seriously sick by request.”
“The third verse of Blessed Assurance will be sung without musical accomplishment.”
Behold
Well-Known Member
How to know you are having a bad day...
"ring.. ring....ring....ring....ring........ring......ring.......ring........ring......ring........ring.....ring........"Suicide Prevention Hotline.......Hold please ""
"ring.. ring....ring....ring....ring........ring......ring.......ring........ring......ring........ring.....ring........"Suicide Prevention Hotline.......Hold please ""
Happy trails to you, my friend! And may God richly bless you!
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