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What position am I in?

Discussion in 'Christian Theology Forum' started by Mariner85, Jan 4, 2009.

  1. Mariner85

    Mariner85 New Member

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    I don't know what to feel or how to feel.... but here is my situation in a nutshell.I (unintentionally) abandoned the church, thinking in quite a naive manner that believing was enough. Now more than ever (despite being merely 24 years old) I fear that I have done nothing but cause God to scratch me off his list, and am destined for eternal hell.I just recently (and seemingly out of nowhere) woke up to faith again. It started with my questioning of my own faith, which I hear is quite normal. The fear of death without ANYTHING afterwards, or a death in which I am eternally cut off from my loved ones caused me to panic. I cried, I breathed fast and heavy, I couldn't concentrate or sleep, and I felt an overwhelming sense of dread. The amazing thing was, that same night I prayed HARD and for awhile, almost having a conversation with the Lord, and miraculously, I went to bed with a sound mind and woke up feeling much better. It was as if I crawled into bed and someone tucked me in and wished me well for the morning. That was enough to convince me that, at the very least, someone is looking out for me. The questions that still bother me, and that I hope to hear answered, are the following...1.) Is it ever too late to repent? 2.) I must be the biggest piece of junk in the world, because I countlessly think or say or do bad things, ask forgiveness, but I go right back to it no sooner than "I'm sorry Lord" escaping my lips. I just cannot focus enough to be or do well and be a good Christian. Is this a problem?3.) I question my faith regularly.... I always wear my crucifix, always make sure to at least cross myself at night before going to bed, but at times when I feel low or think hard about the world around me, I might ask, "is/can there really be a god watching us/me?" I fear that this is the same as turning my back on God, which is a grave sin, but I don't mean it to come across that way.4.) Quite often I think of hell, and cannot cope with the fact that many of my loved ones might never make it. I wish there was a way to pray for all mankind, so that no one will ever be left behind. I might swear, show dislike or disapproval of someone, but I can never hate ANYONE enough to accept their eternal damnation and torture in hell. I wish to see ALL mankind saved, and living comfortably and happily for eternity.I am truly frightened by what I have gotten myself into, and feel good on some days, and bad on other days. Is there hope for me? I never openly spoke out against religion, or god. I just fear that since there are so many of them out there, one cannot help but question their faith at times. I am not a bad person, or at least I try not to be.I am a huge Simpsons fan... I dont know about anyone else, but.... not to be cute, do I really need to turn into a Ned Flanders or sorts to save myself?
     
  2. Jordan

    Jordan Active Member

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    (Mariner85;67123)
    I don't know what to feel or how to feel.... but here is my situation in a nutshell.I (unintentionally) abandoned the church, thinking in quite a naive manner that believing was enough. Now more than ever (despite being merely 24 years old) I fear that I have done nothing but cause God to scratch me off his list, and am destined for eternal hell.I just recently (and seemingly out of nowhere) woke up to faith again. It started with my questioning of my own faith, which I hear is quite normal. The fear of death without ANYTHING afterwards, or a death in which I am eternally cut off from my loved ones caused me to panic. I cried, I breathed fast and heavy, I couldn't concentrate or sleep, and I felt an overwhelming sense of dread. The amazing thing was, that same night I prayed HARD and for awhile, almost having a conversation with the Lord, and miraculously, I went to bed with a sound mind and woke up feeling much better. It was as if I crawled into bed and someone tucked me in and wished me well for the morning. That was enough to convince me that, at the very least, someone is looking out for me. The questions that still bother me, and that I hope to hear answered, are the following...1.) Is it ever too late to repent? 2.) I must be the biggest piece of junk in the world, because I countlessly think or say or do bad things, ask forgiveness, but I go right back to it no sooner than "I'm sorry Lord" escaping my lips. I just cannot focus enough to be or do well and be a good Christian. Is this a problem?3.) I question my faith regularly.... I always wear my crucifix, always make sure to at least cross myself at night before going to bed, but at times when I feel low or think hard about the world around me, I might ask, "is/can there really be a god watching us/me?" I fear that this is the same as turning my back on God, which is a grave sin, but I don't mean it to come across that way.4.) Quite often I think of hell, and cannot cope with the fact that many of my loved ones might never make it. I wish there was a way to pray for all mankind, so that no one will ever be left behind. I might swear, show dislike or disapproval of someone, but I can never hate ANYONE enough to accept their eternal damnation and torture in hell. I wish to see ALL mankind saved, and living comfortably and happily for eternity.I am truly frightened by what I have gotten myself into, and feel good on some days, and bad on other days. Is there hope for me? I never openly spoke out against religion, or god. I just fear that since there are so many of them out there, one cannot help but question their faith at times. I am not a bad person, or at least I try not to be.
    1. 'Is it ever too late to repent?'II Peter 3:9 - The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.Matthew 9:13 - But go ye and learn what that meaneth, I will have mercy, and not sacrifice: for I am not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.Mark 2:17 - When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.Luke 5:32 - I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.2. 'I must be the biggest piece of junk in the world...'No, you aren't the biggest piece of junk in this world. No one in this world is judged yet by God... The only person judged is the fallen archangel Satan, whose name is also Lucifer.John 17:12 - While I was with them in the world, I kept them in thy name: those that thou gavest me I have kept, and none of them is lost, but the son of perdition; that the scripture might be fulfilled.3. 'is/can there really be a god watching us/me?'John 1:1 - In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.Hebrews 13:5 - Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.In return, we must not leave Him. He always keeps His promise. But we can break our promises.John 14:15 - If ye love me, keep my commandments.
     
  3. Mariner85

    Mariner85 New Member

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    But I regularly and routinely screw up in following the commandments. I have faith, because the first thing that comes to mind when I see something amazing or grand is "wow look at god's work..."But I falter time and time and time again. I just fear for myself, my family, and generally all of us.
     
  4. Jordan

    Jordan Active Member

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    (Mariner85;67126)
    But I regularly and routinely screw up in following the commandments. I have faith, because the first thing that comes to mind when I see something amazing or grand is "wow look at god's work..."But I falter time and time and time again. I just fear for myself, my family, and generally all of us.
    No need to fear. God does not want our fear. He wants our love.II Timothy 1:7 - For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.I John 4:18 - There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.Listen to God. He shall teach you in all things in the Book. As He foretold us all things. (Mark 13:23)
     
  5. Mariner85

    Mariner85 New Member

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    What gives me solace now, and was a particularly nice story from the bible that I remember from my childhood days, is found in Mark 5:22-34"25 And there was a woman who had had a flow of blood for twelve years, and who had suffered much under many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was no better but rather grew worse. She had heard the reports about Jesus, and came up behind him in the crowd and touched his garment. For she said, "If I touch even his garments, I shall be made well." And immediately the hemorrhage ceased; and she felt in her body that she was healed of her disease. And Jesus, perceiving in himself that power had gone forth from him, immediately turned about in the crowd, and said, "Who touched my garments?" And his disciples said to him, "You see the crowd pressing around you, and yet you say, 'Who touched me?'" And he looked around to see who had done it. But the woman, knowing what had been done to her, came in fear and trembling and fell down before him, and told him the whole truth. And he said to her, "Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace, and be healed of your disease." This story gives me much hopeIf ALL of my sins are my plague, then I will keep striving for goodness, reaching for his salvation and mercy.
     
  6. AusDisciple

    AusDisciple New Member

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    Mariner,Jordan has a wonderful knowledge of the Word of God and I agree fully with his replies to you.You are showing the marks of a true Christian in that you have cried out to God with genuine repentance and strong faith and He has answered you and given you the desire to not only have faith but to follow the example set forth by Him in His word (The Bible) and as our saviour in the flesh, Jesus Christ.Always remember that it is impossible for us to get to Heaven on account of good works alone and we will fail in temptation sometimes. That is why we need Jesus Christ as our saviour. He was the only perfect man, born without sin, being God in the flesh and He took on all of our sins, past, present AND future and overcome them through His death, resurrection and ascension to Heaven.Keep building your faith by reading God's word, praying to Him consistently and praising Him, knowing He is with you always.May God bless you as one of His children.
     
  7. epistemaniac

    epistemaniac New Member

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    also remember that we will still sin, even after becoming a Christian.... 1 John 1:8 (ESV) If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us." here is something I heard once, that I think is very profound:the gospel is for Christians tooI think this is profound because we Christians seem forget that salvation was by grace through faith, Ephesians 2:8-9 (ESV) 8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast." So even the ability to seek after God is, itself, a gift." ..... we did not do or could not ever do anything to make God beholden to us in such a way as to say that He owes us salvation..... and after we become Christians the fact that our salvation was by grace through faith, and this, not of ourselves, is still just as true. its not as if once we are saved then our salvation is dependent upon our good works. The true Christian will always produce good works, of course. But these works are the result of, and the not the reason for, our salvation.The story in Mark makes me think of this story in Mark as well....Mark 9:23-24 (ESV) 23 And Jesus said to him, “ ‘If you can’! All things are possible for one who believes.” 24 Immediately the father of the child cried out and said, “I believe; help my unbelief!” So the position you are in now is no different than the position any Christian is in, that is, if you are a Christian, which you seem to be, its one of grace and mercy. We believe, and we thank God for that ability to believe for we cannot and would not ever believe in Him unless it was granted to us. John 6:44 (ESV) No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him. And I will raise him up on the last day. and John 6:65 (ESV) And he said, “This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted him by the Father.” " We persevere in the faith, and we thank God for that ability to persevere. Philippians 2:12-13 (ESV) 12 Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, 13 for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure."to answer your specific questions, from my POV anyways...1) its too late only after you die; Hebrews 9:27 (ESV) And just as it is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment,"but while you are still alive..... you still have today to repent, don't waste it, though it seems, you haven't wasted your chance....Hebrews 4:6-7 (ESV) 6 Since therefore it remains for some to enter it, and those who formerly received the good news failed to enter because of disobedience, 7 again he appoints a certain day, “Today,” saying through David so long afterward, in the words already quoted, “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts.” 2) you sound just like Paul, and, I may add, that is not a bad thing.... [​IMG]Romans 7:14-23 (ESV) 14 For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin. 15 For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. 16 Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. 17 So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. 18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. 21 So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. 22 For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, 23 but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. "But..... But God.... God has saved you, giving you the ability to rise above your sin, Romans 7:23-25 (ESV) 23 but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. 24 Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? 25 Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin. for you are, if you are a Christian, a new creature.... now able to do what you once could not do....2 Corinthians 5:16-17 (ESV) 16 From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. 17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. Everybody struggles.... God made you, and God don't make no junk [​IMG] ...... the struggle is probably, itself, evidence of faith. A lack of concern about these matters, personal holiness etc, is evidence that you are not a new creation and not one of His. The persons whom history regards as "saints", people who have lived exemplary lives, those whom we would consider very close to God, would still, themselves, say that they feel their own sin greatly and are saddened by it, and at times feel far from God. That is why we must not do too much "naval gazing" and remember that salvation is an objective fact, though of course it is impossible to not be somewhat introspective, but a Christian is saved due to Christ's perfect sacrifice on the cross, His life of perfect obedience, His intercession for the saints at God's right hand, His atonement and propitiation for our sins is complete, and we must not go on emotional roller coaster rides basing our salvation on how close or how far we happen feel to God at various times. This is something important to consider in matters of sanctification, but not justification. Justification is a one time, once and for all declaration of our innocence based on our being "in Christ", sanctification is an individual road we must walk, growing closer to God in our own ways based on our own unique personal circumstances. Justification and sanctification are not the same things, so while they must never be confused with one another, we realize that they are also never found separate from one another, where there is true justification, there is, as well, true sanctification.3) we need to examine ourselves, to be sure;2 Corinthians 13:5 (ESV) Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you fail to meet the test! but there is also a time when we ought to fully rest in Jesus Christ's completed work, and have a blessed assurance that we are in fact saved.....1 John 2:1-3 (ESV) 1 My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. 2 He is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world. 3 And by this we know that we have come to know him, if we keep his commandments. As far as having to become a "Ned Flanders" goes, I don't watch the Simpson's, so I am not sure what you mean. blessings,ken
     
  8. crooner

    crooner New Member

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    (Mariner85;67126)
    But I regularly and routinely screw up in following the commandments. I have faith, because the first thing that comes to mind when I see something amazing or grand is "wow look at god's work..."But I falter time and time and time again. I just fear for myself, my family, and generally all of us.
    Your saved by what Jesus did not what you do or dont do. Stay focused on his grace
     
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