Please Pray for me to make an important decision.

[Dosia]

It's about my addict son again. It's come to my attention that he and his girlfriend took it upon themselves to cash some cheques of mine without my permission? With my consent a Bank Investigation will be started, but I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing for him or her, I love him and want what's right for him, but I realize that if I start this, he may never speak to me again? On the one hand, he may be forced to get the help he needs, so it will be worth it to get him saved from his addiction? but on the other hand, it may have serious consequences for him, his girlfriend and their young son? it's not my intention to break them up, but strengthen them as a family and help them to overcome drugs?

God help me to come to the right decision, not mine, but Yours, because you know what's best for him (and his gf?) Make that decision for me LORD, if possible, but if I'm the one you want to go ahead, then I will do it, Amen

 

[Raccoon1010]

I wouldn't turn my children over to the police. The system is hard on people and not something that is family. I pray you will have discernment on this issue. But if they continue to do those things then someone else will probably turn them in. So maybe you won't have to do it.

 

[Heart2Soul]

It's about my addict son again. It's come to my attention that he and his girlfriend took it upon themselves to cash some cheques of mine without my permission? With my consent a Bank Investigation will be started, but I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing for him or her, I love him and want what's right for him, but I realize that if I start this, he may never speak to me again? On the one hand, he may be forced to get the help he needs, so it will be worth it to get him saved from his addiction? but on the other hand, it may have serious consequences for him, his girlfriend and their young son? it's not my intention to break them up, but strengthen them as a family and help them to overcome drugs?

God help me to come to the right decision, not mine, but Yours, because you know what's best for him (and his gf?) Make that decision for me LORD, if possible, but if I'm the one you want to go ahead, then I will do it, Amen

I had to make a similar decision with my daughter. I finally kicked her out of the house and she has lived on the streets (couch surfing) ever since
I prayed and prayed about it and I said Father, I release her completely to you....she is your daughter more than mine....I am a temporary parent but you are her eternal Father....whatever it takes do what you must to turn her life around...even if it means going to jail.
I trust in You, Lord to put the right people in her life that will influence her to turn to you

Well 2 weeks later she was arrested....
Now 3 years later she has been arrested 2 more times....she is pending trial in January
His Will be done...I trust Him.

 

[Dosia]

It's such a difficult journey to watch someone you love be so controlled by a drug, that nothing else matters, it becomes their priority and they will do whatever they have to do, in their desperate attempt to get it? I think I've seen all the signs, like lying and stealing from his own, and borrowing but it's never enough, the shaking and sweating and playing on the hearts and minds of those he borrows from, saying if he doesn't come up with the money, someone is coming after him and us, it's a sickness so deep and mind controlling that only God can help deliver, at least that is what it appears with my son? My prayers go out for all addicts, and also to all parents and family members of drug Addicts. When I thought my son couldn't go any lower with his drug habit, he has.., he is even worse now, and his looks worry me. We see him 3-4 times a year? He use to be so family orientated, and valued us and our home, not anymore?

May God deliver him and reach him where it matters most, so he can be helped, In Jesus Name, Amen

Jail, does it help or make them worse? I think my son would do better with counselling and a rehab clinical setting. Does a judge ever hand out such a sentence REHAB I read that some jails will get them off drugs, but the news isn't always positive

 

[Heart2Soul]

It's such a difficult journey to watch someone you love be so controlled by a drug, that nothing else matters, it becomes their priority and they will do whatever they have to do, in their desperate attempt to get it? I think I've seen all the signs, like lying and stealing from his own, and borrowing but it's never enough, the shaking and sweating and playing on the hearts and minds of those he borrows from, saying if he doesn't come up with the money, someone is coming after him and us, it's a sickness so deep and mind controlling that only God can help deliver, at least that is what it appears with my son? My prayers go out for all addicts, and also to all parents and family members of drug Addicts. When I thought my son couldn't go any lower with his drug habit, he has.., he is even worse now, and his looks worry me. We see him 3-4 times a year? He use to be so family orientated, and valued us and our home, not anymore?

May God deliver him and reach him where it matters most, so he can be helped, In Jesus Name, Amen

Jail, does it help or make them worse? I think my son would do better with counselling and a rehab clinical setting. Does a judge ever hand out such a sentence REHAB I read that some jails will get them off drugs, but the news isn't always positive

When my daughter was in jail after the 2nd arrest she got involved in Bible studies there and got closer...but then she got out and went back to the same friends.

 

[Raccoon1010]

It's such a difficult journey to watch someone you love be so controlled by a drug, that nothing else matters, it becomes their priority and they will do whatever they have to do, in their desperate attempt to get it? I think I've seen all the signs, like lying and stealing from his own, and borrowing but it's never enough, the shaking and sweating and playing on the hearts and minds of those he borrows from, saying if he doesn't come up with the money, someone is coming after him and us, it's a sickness so deep and mind controlling that only God can help deliver, at least that is what it appears with my son? My prayers go out for all addicts, and also to all parents and family members of drug Addicts. When I thought my son couldn't go any lower with his drug habit, he has.., he is even worse now, and his looks worry me. We see him 3-4 times a year? He use to be so family orientated, and valued us and our home, not anymore?

May God deliver him and reach him where it matters most, so he can be helped, In Jesus Name, Amen

Jail, does it help or make them worse? I think my son would do better with counselling and a rehab clinical setting. Does a judge ever hand out such a sentence REHAB I read that some jails will get them off drugs, but the news isn't always positive

Jail doesn't help. A good 12 step program could help but they have to be willing and desire change. All Jail does is force them to participate so it's not genuine.

 

[Dosia]

Thank you for all the kind advice, seems like my only recourse is to continue to pray. It's in God's hands. Right now I'm angry and hurt they went behind my back and defrauded me, I've been nothing but good to them and they took advantage of that? Think I need to calm down a few days before I can think clearly as to where to go from here?

Heart2soul: you said " When my daughter was in jail after the 2nd arrest she got involved in Bible studies there and got closer." Listen, I think those studies impressed on her heart and even though she turned from them when she got out, what she has learned will return to her, and one day when she decides to make a choice, those words will be there waiting for her.

 

[farouk]

Thank you for all the kind advice, seems like my only recourse is to continue to pray. It's in God's hands. Right now I'm angry and hurt they went behind my back and defrauded me, I've been nothing but good to them and they took advantage of that? Think I need to calm down a few days before I can think clearly as to where to go from here?

Heart2soul: you said " When my daughter was in jail after the 2nd arrest she got involved in Bible studies there and got closer." Listen, I think those studies impressed on her heart and even though she turned from them when she got out, what she has learned will return to her, and one day when she decides to make a choice, those words will be there waiting for her.

@Dosia How heart-rending! I am reminded of Isaiah 48.10: "I have chosen thee in the furnace of affliction." (The point being, not to avoid the affliction at all costs, but to know by faith that the Lord is with us.) The privilege of prayer never ends.

On a totally different, practical note, if a bank notices something amiss and starts an investigation about a cheque's signature, and it transpires that a registered signatory did not sign the cheque, the bank might properly wonder why the fraudulent activity was not reported by the registered signatory. In other words, going to law and reporting someone to the police is one thing; talking to the bank whose procedures have been compromised by a non-signatory is another.

 

[Heart2Soul]

Jail doesn't help. A good 12 step program could help but they have to be willing and desire change. All Jail does is force them to participate so it's not genuine.

He has already committed the crime of stealing her checks...12 step may help after it is determined whether he goes to jail or not.
I am not a fan of AA...or NA...you are kept in a mindset that you are an addict for the rest of your life.

 

[Raccoon1010]

He has already committed the crime of stealing her checks...12 step may help after it is determined whether he goes to jail or not.
I am not a fan of AA...or NA...you are kept in a mindset that you are an addict for the rest of your life.

Yes I quit drinking for 10 years and just went to church instead of meetings. I've been in the system myself and it only does damage to a persons life, it doesn't help you quit drugs or alcohol, and not being able to get a job or rent an apartment due to felonies. After you're judged by the system they keep judging you till you die with a criminal record. It hardly matches the Lord's will of forgiveness.

 

[farouk]

When my daughter was in jail after the 2nd arrest she got involved in Bible studies there and got closer...but then she got out and went back to the same friends.

@Heart2Soul I'm sure you keep pouring your heart out to the Lord about her (Psalm 62.8).

 

[Wynona]

I am not a parent so take my words with a grain of salt but I think the bank investigation was the right call.

I'm of the mind that, while you cannot control other people, you can choose whether or not you become a part of their negative behaviour.

You have every right to feel upset. And pretending it's okay isn't the answer. If your son distances himself over this, that is not your fault.

Once you have a clear head, Im sure you'll know how to proceed wisely.

 

[amadeus]

@Dosia I won't try offer more advice here. I will simply keep you and your son's situation in particular in prayer!

 

[Dosia]

I thank each of you whole heartedly for the prayers and the advice. I'm starting to look at this in different way. If I do nothing, it's like saying their behaviour was acceptable, if I let that go easily, what will they do next? It's pointless to have a talk, most often they are not with it enough to grasp what is being said, also, why is it that often children, even grown adult children do not take the advice of the family seriously? All I can do, is continue to pray and wait upon the LORD to make it clear to me what needs to be done? Maybe God doesn't even need my help to set things right? GOD, You know the answer here, help me to listen to Your still small voice. Guide me with Your Word and Your direction. Save my son's soul, deliver him from drug addiction and all that comes with it, In Jesus Name, thank You God, Amen

 

[Marvelloustime]

I have added you, your son and his girlfriend to my prayer list.

 

[Waiting on him]

I thank each of you whole heartedly for the prayers and the advice. I'm starting to look at this in different way. If I do nothing, it's like saying their behaviour was acceptable, if I let that go easily, what will they do next? It's pointless to have a talk, most often they are not with it enough to grasp what is being said, also, why is it that often children, even grown adult children do not take the advice of the family seriously? All I can do, is continue to pray and wait upon the LORD to make it clear to me what needs to be done? Maybe God doesn't even need my help to set things right? GOD, You know the answer here, help me to listen to Your still small voice. Guide me with Your Word and Your direction. Save my son's soul, deliver him from drug addiction and all that comes with it, In Jesus Name, thank You God, Amen

What you have with the crime that’s been committed is great leverage.

Be clever with the leverage! It may be that your son is waiting to see you do the hard stuff, before he’ll commit to the hard stuff.

 

[Mayflower]

It's about my addict son again. It's come to my attention that he and his girlfriend took it upon themselves to cash some cheques of mine without my permission? With my consent a Bank Investigation will be started, but I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing for him or her, I love him and want what's right for him, but I realize that if I start this, he may never speak to me again? On the one hand, he may be forced to get the help he needs, so it will be worth it to get him saved from his addiction? but on the other hand, it may have serious consequences for him, his girlfriend and their young son? it's not my intention to break them up, but strengthen them as a family and help them to overcome drugs?

God help me to come to the right decision, not mine, but Yours, because you know what's best for him (and his gf?) Make that decision for me LORD, if possible, but if I'm the one you want to go ahead, then I will do it, Amen

Father, I pray for Dosia and her son. Please convict her son with this addiction for the good of him and his family. Thank You that You give wisdom and discernment. We ask You give Dosia peace and discernment with making this decision. Help her to have confident assurance in this time that You are with her in this. In Jesus Name, Amen.

 

[Mayflower]

It's such a difficult journey to watch someone you love be so controlled by a drug, that nothing else matters, it becomes their priority and they will do whatever they have to do, in their desperate attempt to get it? I think I've seen all the signs, like lying and stealing from his own, and borrowing but it's never enough, the shaking and sweating and playing on the hearts and minds of those he borrows from, saying if he doesn't come up with the money, someone is coming after him and us, it's a sickness so deep and mind controlling that only God can help deliver, at least that is what it appears with my son? My prayers go out for all addicts, and also to all parents and family members of drug Addicts. When I thought my son couldn't go any lower with his drug habit, he has.., he is even worse now, and his looks worry me. We see him 3-4 times a year? He use to be so family orientated, and valued us and our home, not anymore?

May God deliver him and reach him where it matters most, so he can be helped, In Jesus Name, Amen

Jail, does it help or make them worse? I think my son would do better with counselling and a rehab clinical setting. Does a judge ever hand out such a sentence REHAB I read that some jails will get them off drugs, but the news isn't always positive

Teen Challenge for adults is a very helpful faith based program... May be worth looking into. There are centers everywhere. Bless you.

 

[lilygrace]

celebrate recovery and reformers unanimous are pretty good.

 

[Angelina]

It's about my addict son again. It's come to my attention that he and his girlfriend took it upon themselves to cash some cheques of mine without my permission? With my consent a Bank Investigation will be started, but I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing for him or her, I love him and want what's right for him, but I realize that if I start this, he may never speak to me again? On the one hand, he may be forced to get the help he needs, so it will be worth it to get him saved from his addiction? but on the other hand, it may have serious consequences for him, his girlfriend and their young son? it's not my intention to break them up, but strengthen them as a family and help them to overcome drugs?

God help me to come to the right decision, not mine, but Yours, because you know what's best for him (and his gf?) Make that decision for me LORD, if possible, but if I'm the one you want to go ahead, then I will do it, Amen

Very tricky situation indeed. I will be praying that God take over and the outcome be according to his will...

Blessings and Peace!