Indeed

  • Welcome to Christian Forums, a Christian Forum that recognizes that all Christians are a work in progress.

    You will need to register to be able to join in fellowship with Christians all over the world.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless!

djstav

Active Member
Sep 9, 2018
528
204
43
50
Brisbane
Faith
Other Faith
Country
Australia
Do you know what it's like to believe in Jesus as far as your heart can go, but still you're left with this niggling in your mind. You do everything you can do to lead a clean life, you do everything to be done with your old ways. But this niggling carry's on and on, and no matter how much faith you throw at an invisible enemy, you end up spiritually broke. You pray to be the very thing Jesus wants, you pray for more faith, for more wisdom, but you end up spiritually bankrupt.

Then like a shot in the dark you are struck down with mental illness, and no matter how much you plea with the doctors that you are talking to God, you soon realize that this god is just a delusion conjured up by your schizophrenic mind. Then slowly, slowly, you can't trust anything supernatural anymore.

Now imagine that the only way to wellness is to dismiss the subjective & unreal concepts of the Bible. Then in a few year's pass and you recover more than you could hope for. But it's all too late because all those years of mental illness shot your life to piece's, and you're left alone with nothing.

Now think, even though you can't trust what was once familiar you return to Jesus looking for a better way to live, but every time you fix your eye's on him you return to a half baked nonsensical world.

There's not much I haven't done, not much I haven't said to God myself. I've grown tired of the battle on both side's of the believer's fence, I can't hear it out anymore. Personally I think we all have it very wrong, very wrong indeed.
 
B

brakelite

Guest
It is very difficult to understand where someone is coming from when all we have is a few short paragraphs to read. Hardly the stuff for a definitive statement regarding your personal situation. So please, forgive me if I sound like I am coming across as judgmental or presumptive. You are not the first person on this forum to relate his/her mental issues as reasons for distrust of God. And I live with someone with PTSD, and she also find it difficult to make any headway in her faith.
That said, from what I read of your short post, I think you misunderstand what Christianity is really all about. It isn't about you doing stuff to become a Christian. It isn't about your efforts in order to please, or impress God enough to motivate him into doing stuff on return.
Christianity is about being grateful for what God has already done for us despite our sinful rebellious natures and our dysfunctional ways, habits and addictions. Christians are grateful for all God has done, recognise His right to rule their lives, and surrender their lives to Him giving Him the freedom to change and recreate lives according to His holiness, power, and purposes.
God will not do anything unless you first surrender, and secondly leave him to do what he knows is best. You trust him on the basis of what he has already done at Calvary.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

GodsGrace

Well-Known Member
Aug 29, 2017
10,727
5,716
113
Tuscany
Faith
Christian
Country
Italy
Do you know what it's like to believe in Jesus as far as your heart can go, but still you're left with this niggling in your mind. You do everything you can do to lead a clean life, you do everything to be done with your old ways. But this niggling carry's on and on, and no matter how much faith you throw at an invisible enemy, you end up spiritually broke. You pray to be the very thing Jesus wants, you pray for more faith, for more wisdom, but you end up spiritually bankrupt.

Then like a shot in the dark you are struck down with mental illness, and no matter how much you plea with the doctors that you are talking to God, you soon realize that this god is just a delusion conjured up by your schizophrenic mind. Then slowly, slowly, you can't trust anything supernatural anymore.

Now imagine that the only way to wellness is to dismiss the subjective & unreal concepts of the Bible. Then in a few year's pass and you recover more than you could hope for. But it's all too late because all those years of mental illness shot your life to piece's, and you're left alone with nothing.

Now think, even though you can't trust what was once familiar you return to Jesus looking for a better way to live, but every time you fix your eye's on him you return to a half baked nonsensical world.

There's not much I haven't done, not much I haven't said to God myself. I've grown tired of the battle on both side's of the believer's fence, I can't hear it out anymore. Personally I think we all have it very wrong, very wrong indeed.
How does one RECOVER from schizophrenia??
 

djstav

Active Member
Sep 9, 2018
528
204
43
50
Brisbane
Faith
Other Faith
Country
Australia
It is very difficult to understand where someone is coming from when all we have is a few short paragraphs to read. Hardly the stuff for a definitive statement regarding your personal situation. So please, forgive me if I sound like I am coming across as judgmental or presumptive. You are not the first person on this forum to relate his/her mental issues as reasons for distrust of God. And I live with someone with PTSD, and she also find it difficult to make any headway in her faith.
That said, from what I read of your short post, I think you misunderstand what Christianity is really all about. It isn't about you doing stuff to become a Christian. It isn't about your efforts in order to please, or impress God enough to motivate him into doing stuff on return.
Christianity is about being grateful for what God has already done for us despite our sinful rebellious natures and our dysfunctional ways, habits and addictions. Christians are grateful for all God has done, recognise His right to rule their lives, and surrender their lives to Him giving Him the freedom to change and recreate lives according to His holiness, power, and purposes.
God will not do anything unless you first surrender, and secondly leave him to do what he knows is best. You trust him on the basis of what he has already done at Calvary.
Then I already have in the past, why continue a faithful life if it only inflames my mental condition. Can I sit back and carry on with life, or must I hold on to faith in Jesus (Because that would be doing something)
 

Stranger

Well-Known Member
Oct 5, 2016
8,826
3,157
113
Texas
Faith
Christian
Country
United States
There is simply no known cure, all I know is that faith & belief exasperates the condition.

You're either lying or a glutton for punishment. If faith makes your condition worse what are you doing here? Go to forum.schizophrenia.com where you're amongst those just like you. And take BreadOfLife there with you.

Stranger
 

Hidden In Him

Well-Known Member
May 10, 2018
10,600
10,883
113
59
Lafayette, LA
Faith
Christian
Country
United States
There is simply no known cure, all I know is that faith & belief exasperates the condition.

I think you meant exacerbates. :)
Do you know what it's like to believe in Jesus as far as your heart can go, but still you're left with this niggling in your mind. You do everything you can do to lead a clean life, you do everything to be done with your old ways. But this niggling carry's on and on, and no matter how much faith you throw at an invisible enemy, you end up spiritually broke. You pray to be the very thing Jesus wants, you pray for more faith, for more wisdom, but you end up spiritually bankrupt.

Then like a shot in the dark you are struck down with mental illness, and no matter how much you plea with the doctors that you are talking to God, you soon realize that this god is just a delusion conjured up by your schizophrenic mind. Then slowly, slowly, you can't trust anything supernatural anymore.

Now imagine that the only way to wellness is to dismiss the subjective & unreal concepts of the Bible. Then in a few year's pass and you recover more than you could hope for. But it's all too late because all those years of mental illness shot your life to piece's, and you're left alone with nothing.

Now think, even though you can't trust what was once familiar you return to Jesus looking for a better way to live, but every time you fix your eye's on him you return to a half baked nonsensical world.

There's not much I haven't done, not much I haven't said to God myself. I've grown tired of the battle on both side's of the believer's fence, I can't hear it out anymore. Personally I think we all have it very wrong, very wrong indeed.

This is tough to read. Let me share something with you that may help. For the last year or so I had been interpreting dreams for people. I have a gift for doing so, the only problem being that I became aware that many of the dreams I was interpreting for people may have been coming from the enemy and not God. It also struck me that even several of my own dreams may have been from a demonic spirit that was trying to mess with my life.

I and some of the people I interpreted for regularly found ourselves in a similar circumstance: How much of the supernatural can be trusted? One friend even questioned her own praying in tongues, which had been edifying to her spirit. But she nevertheless wasn't sure if she could trust it was from God anymore.

The answer, in various ways, has been to simply back away from the supernatural in general some but without backing away from God. I have gone back to writing my Bible Studies (my primary calling is as a Bible Teacher). She has gone back to following an earthly schedule, and concentrating even more closely on being a wife and mother, and helping out at church. In other words, staying mentally active on other things associated with our relationships with God.

Now, do I intend on setting aside interpreting dreams and visions forever? God forbid. But I have set it aside until I enter a season where He gives me the ability to discern exactly what source is behind a particular dream or vision.

I suggest you take the same approach. To believe in a Christianity that is devoid of the supernatural is to believe in a fraud; a hollow faith that in no way resembles New Testament Christianity. But until He gives you a peace about things, and the ability to discern good from evil, concentrate on the more mental aspects of your faith.

Hope this helps, and blessings in Christ.
Hidden In Him
 

VictoryinJesus

Well-Known Member
Jan 26, 2017
9,581
7,857
113
Faith
Christian
Country
United States
Do you know what it's like to believe in Jesus as far as your heart can go, but still you're left with this niggling in your mind. You do everything you can do to lead a clean life, you do everything to be done with your old ways. But this niggling carry's on and on, and no matter how much faith you throw at an invisible enemy, you end up spiritually broke. You pray to be the very thing Jesus wants, you pray for more faith, for more wisdom, but you end up spiritually bankrupt.

Then like a shot in the dark you are struck down with mental illness, and no matter how much you plea with the doctors that you are talking to God, you soon realize that this god is just a delusion conjured up by your schizophrenic mind. Then slowly, slowly, you can't trust anything supernatural anymore.

Now imagine that the only way to wellness is to dismiss the subjective & unreal concepts of the Bible. Then in a few year's pass and you recover more than you could hope for. But it's all too late because all those years of mental illness shot your life to piece's, and you're left alone with nothing.

Now think, even though you can't trust what was once familiar you return to Jesus looking for a better way to live, but every time you fix your eye's on him you return to a half baked nonsensical world.

There's not much I haven't done, not much I haven't said to God myself. I've grown tired of the battle on both side's of the believer's fence, I can't hear it out anymore. Personally I think we all have it very wrong, very wrong indeed.

Yes, I understand. The symptoms of the illness I have is believing God speaks to you(or they say). What if they are wrong that told you have delusions? Why are you back to Him? If life was so perfect without it and it all straightened out...why are you back?
 

djstav

Active Member
Sep 9, 2018
528
204
43
50
Brisbane
Faith
Other Faith
Country
Australia
I think you meant exacerbates. :)


This is tough to read. Let me share something with you that may help. For the last year or so I had been interpreting dreams for people. I have a gift for doing so, the only problem being that I became aware that many of the dreams I was interpreting for people may have been coming from the enemy and not God. It also struck me that even several of my own dreams may have been from a demonic spirit that was trying to mess with my life.

I and some of the people I interpreted for regularly found ourselves in a similar circumstance: How much of the supernatural can be trusted? One friend even questioned her own praying in tongues, which had been edifying to her spirit. But she nevertheless wasn't sure if she could trust it was from God anymore.

The answer, in various ways, has been to simply back away from the supernatural in general some but without backing away from God. I have gone back to writing my Bible Studies (my primary calling is as a Bible Teacher). She has gone back to following an earthly schedule, and concentrating even more closely on being a wife and mother, and helping out at church. In other words, staying mentally active on other things associated with our relationships with God.

Now, do I intend on setting aside interpreting dreams and visions forever? God forbid. But I have set it aside until I enter a season where He gives me the ability to discern exactly what source is behind a particular dream or vision.

I suggest you take the same approach. To believe in a Christianity that is devoid of the supernatural is to believe in a fraud; a hollow faith that in no way resembles New Testament Christianity. But until He gives you a peace about things, and the ability to discern good from evil, concentrate on the more mental aspects of your faith.

Hope this helps, and blessings in Christ.
Hidden In Him
English sucks, but I'm stuck with it now.

When it comes to spiritual interpolation I think I've tried every approach.
 

djstav

Active Member
Sep 9, 2018
528
204
43
50
Brisbane
Faith
Other Faith
Country
Australia
Yes, I understand. The symptoms of the illness I have is believing God speaks to you(or they say). What if they are wrong that told you have delusions? Why are you back to Him? If life was so perfect without it and it all straightened out...why are you back?
No one has a perfect life, with or without God. I manage better without focusing on random event's as synchronized moments of Gods will. I remember back in the Christian day's I'd always think Jesus was showing me something. I'd drone on about it, but it was actually nothing, just my mind trying to make patterns out of the chaos.
 

VictoryinJesus

Well-Known Member
Jan 26, 2017
9,581
7,857
113
Faith
Christian
Country
United States
No one has a perfect life, with or without God. I manage better without focusing on random event's as synchronized moments of Gods will. I remember back in the Christian day's I'd always think Jesus was showing me something. I'd drone on about it, but it was actually nothing, just my mind trying to make patterns out of the chaos.

Which was worst seeing more in the chaos ...or the convincing of others that you saw or heard more?
 

Stumpmaster

Well-Known Member
Apr 5, 2009
2,048
1,389
113
69
Hamilton, New Zealand
Faith
Christian
Country
New Zealand
Then I already have in the past, why continue a faithful life if it only inflames my mental condition. Can I sit back and carry on with life, or must I hold on to faith in Jesus (Because that would be doing something)
Hi djstav, Even though Charles Spurgeon was greatly used of God as a preacher and leader in the body of Christ, he suffered from bouts of deep depression which incapacitated him for weeks. Crowds used to flock to hear him speak but when the depression came on him he would not preach for 3 weeks or so, and then rally his spirit once more and carry on. When I learn of people suffering depression or mental illness I think about Job in the OT. God allowed Satan to afflict him but not to take his life. It was a test to see if he would renounce his faith in God. Even though he complained about his great ordeal he refused to curse God, saying these words instead:
(Job 13:15) "Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him: but I will maintain mine own ways before him."
The apostle Paul also had a lot of trouble to cope with and because Satan didn't like him spreading the Gospel and converting people to Christ he sent a demon or messenger to afflict him, but after asking God 3 times to stop this from happening Paul accepted it as being something that would become a perfect work of God:
2Co 12:7-10
(7) And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure.
(8) For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me.
(9) And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
(10) Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.

I wonder if there are any servants of Christ who can pray with you and guide you in speaking out God's promises from Scripture on a continual basis. Here's one to start with, to be spoken out in private reverence to God who will honour His word:
2Ti 1:7-8
(7) For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
(8) Therefore you should not be ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, nor of me his prisoner: but you should be a partaker of the afflictions of the gospel according to the power of God;

Eternal Blessings to you fellow pilgrim.
 
  • Like
Reactions: APAK and Helen

VictoryinJesus

Well-Known Member
Jan 26, 2017
9,581
7,857
113
Faith
Christian
Country
United States
No one has a perfect life, with or without God. I manage better without focusing on random event's as synchronized moments of Gods will. I remember back in the Christian day's I'd always think Jesus was showing me something. I'd drone on about it, but it was actually nothing, just my mind trying to make patterns out of the chaos.

I have to get off here. You are tormented...the Lord can cast out the torment. It is either true or it is not. Read one of your post the other day about praying for a sound mind and the prayer falling on deaf ears. If you are interested I wrote a blog post the other day with you in mind. It is there under blogs if you want to read it. 2 Timothy 1:7 Says we are given three things specific when given the Spirit of God: power, love, and a sound mind. “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”
 

djstav

Active Member
Sep 9, 2018
528
204
43
50
Brisbane
Faith
Other Faith
Country
Australia
Which was worst seeing more in the chaos ...or the convincing of others that you saw or heard more?
I would say trying to make sense of everything.

It's not possible to have a rock solid theory of everything, trying to create one will make you go completely bonkers. This is why I let thing's happen as they come, no use trying to work out everything with a religious world view.
 

djstav

Active Member
Sep 9, 2018
528
204
43
50
Brisbane
Faith
Other Faith
Country
Australia
I have to get off here. You are tormented...the Lord can cast out the torment. It is either true or it is not. Read one of your post the other day about praying for a sound mind and the prayer falling on deaf ears. If you are interested I wrote a blog post the other day with you in mind. It is there under blogs if you want to read it. 2 Timothy 1:7 Says we are given three things specific when given the Spirit of God: power, love, and a sound mind. “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”
You can't fear and love someone at the same time. Yes I am greatly tormented, a pain you will never fathom.
 

Hidden In Him

Well-Known Member
May 10, 2018
10,600
10,883
113
59
Lafayette, LA
Faith
Christian
Country
United States
Trust me I believed that too.

I'm just thinking there has to be an overcomer's attitude if you're going to get victory over this thing. I've never faced what you're facing, but I have dealt with illnesses and all sorts of obstacles to my faith. NOTHING stands in my way, and nothing ever will. I won't allow it.

If you accept defeat, then the fight is over. I'm reminded of the man with a legion of demons. Surely his state was even worse than yours, and yet he got his deliverance.

P.S. Forgive me if someone has already bought this up. It just came to mind is all.
 

GodsGrace

Well-Known Member
Aug 29, 2017
10,727
5,716
113
Tuscany
Faith
Christian
Country
Italy
There is simply no known cure, all I know is that faith & belief exasperates the condition.
That's what I thought.
This is what you said in your post:

Now imagine that the only way to wellness is to dismiss the subjective & unreal concepts of the Bible. Then in a few year's pass and you recover more than you could hope for. But it's all too late because all those years of mental illness shot your life to piece's, and you're left alone with nothing.

I was kinda hoping they'd found some pill to cause recovery without damaging the heart. Hope springs eternal...maybe someday a real cure will be found.

Also for Parkinsons, Alzheimers, Depression, Autism, Aspergers, etc etc.