In college a guy I was casually seeing physically abused me. Another guy proceeded to take advantage of my weakness at that time. That was 10 years ago and about three hours away from where I now live. The second guy was from the Bronx or something, IOW far far away. Guess who I ran into at the grocery store! Second guy! Can you believe that?! After he took advantage of me I told him never to contact me again. He wouldn't listen so I had to call the police eventually. Once he recognized me today, he had te nerve to say "Excuse me," as if he were about to confirm my name or say hello. Idiot.I can't believe he lives near me now! Hoping he's just visiting. Is God trying to show me something?
Can you believe this?!
- Thread starter TooInvolved1
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(TooInvolved1;44379)
In college a guy I was casually seeing physically abused me. Another guy proceeded to take advantage of my weakness at that time. That was 10 years ago and about three hours away from where I now live. The second guy was from the Bronx or something, IOW far far away. Guess who I ran into at the grocery store! Second guy! Can you believe that?! After he took advantage of me I told him never to contact me again. He wouldn't listen so I had to call the police eventually. Once he recognized me today, he had te nerve to say "Excuse me," as if he were about to confirm my name or say hello. Idiot.I can't believe he lives near me now! Hoping he's just visiting. Is God trying to show me something?
It was probably pure coincidence. My heart goes out to you. I may be wrong but in your post it sounds like you haven't forgiven them - if I am wrong please forgive me. I am not saying this for them but for you. Bitterness hardens your heart to God. I know as I was raped twice and was bitter against the men involved for a long time. God showed me that if I didn't deal with this then the bitterness would make me walk away from Him. It was the hardest thing I have ever done but I can honestly say I have forgiven my rapist's. I saw one of them a few years after I forgave them and I didn't even feel bitterness or anger toward him. In fact I could speak to him as if he was just a stranger I was saying 'hi' to. The rapes now have no effect on my life.
In college a guy I was casually seeing physically abused me. Another guy proceeded to take advantage of my weakness at that time. That was 10 years ago and about three hours away from where I now live. The second guy was from the Bronx or something, IOW far far away. Guess who I ran into at the grocery store! Second guy! Can you believe that?! After he took advantage of me I told him never to contact me again. He wouldn't listen so I had to call the police eventually. Once he recognized me today, he had te nerve to say "Excuse me," as if he were about to confirm my name or say hello. Idiot.I can't believe he lives near me now! Hoping he's just visiting. Is God trying to show me something?
It was probably pure coincidence. My heart goes out to you. I may be wrong but in your post it sounds like you haven't forgiven them - if I am wrong please forgive me. I am not saying this for them but for you. Bitterness hardens your heart to God. I know as I was raped twice and was bitter against the men involved for a long time. God showed me that if I didn't deal with this then the bitterness would make me walk away from Him. It was the hardest thing I have ever done but I can honestly say I have forgiven my rapist's. I saw one of them a few years after I forgave them and I didn't even feel bitterness or anger toward him. In fact I could speak to him as if he was just a stranger I was saying 'hi' to. The rapes now have no effect on my life.
(TooInvolved1;44379)
In college a guy I was casually seeing physically abused me. Another guy proceeded to take advantage of my weakness at that time. That was 10 years ago and about three hours away from where I now live. The second guy was from the Bronx or something, IOW far far away. Guess who I ran into at the grocery store! Second guy! Can you believe that?! After he took advantage of me I told him never to contact me again. He wouldn't listen so I had to call the police eventually. Once he recognized me today, he had te nerve to say "Excuse me," as if he were about to confirm my name or say hello. Idiot.I can't believe he lives near me now! Hoping he's just visiting. Is God trying to show me something?
Sounds like you have rotten luck with guys. I don't really understand the part about "take advantage of my weakness" stuff. However, what this guy did doesn't sound very Christian to me. Maybe you need to move or something -- find a town with better guys. Sounds like you are surrounded by clowns.And Nyoka, maybe you need to move too.
Sounds like you live in the post-apocalyptic world of "Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome"
In college a guy I was casually seeing physically abused me. Another guy proceeded to take advantage of my weakness at that time. That was 10 years ago and about three hours away from where I now live. The second guy was from the Bronx or something, IOW far far away. Guess who I ran into at the grocery store! Second guy! Can you believe that?! After he took advantage of me I told him never to contact me again. He wouldn't listen so I had to call the police eventually. Once he recognized me today, he had te nerve to say "Excuse me," as if he were about to confirm my name or say hello. Idiot.I can't believe he lives near me now! Hoping he's just visiting. Is God trying to show me something?
Sounds like you have rotten luck with guys. I don't really understand the part about "take advantage of my weakness" stuff. However, what this guy did doesn't sound very Christian to me. Maybe you need to move or something -- find a town with better guys. Sounds like you are surrounded by clowns.And Nyoka, maybe you need to move too.
Sounds like you live in the post-apocalyptic world of "Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome"(RaddSpencer;44495)
Sounds like you have rotten luck with guys. I don't really understand the part about "take advantage of my weakness" stuff. However, what this guy did doesn't sound very Christian to me. Maybe you need to move or something -- find a town with better guys. Sounds like you are surrounded by clowns.And Nyoka, maybe you need to move too. Sounds like you live in the post-apocalyptic world of "Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome"
I have no intention of moving. I could meet guys like my attackers anywhere. I also don't live in fear of them or anyone else now. My Lord has given me joy, peace and a wonderful husband. I know God could not have given my husband to me if I hadn't dealt with my attacks. I see the rapes as nothing more than a problem that happened and is now over - just like I see times where money is a bit tight. If those men can't forgive themselves then that is their problem and nothing to do with me. If they came to me to apologize I would show the love of God to them like I would anyone else. These things happen no matter where you live but the important thing is how you deal with them.
Sounds like you have rotten luck with guys. I don't really understand the part about "take advantage of my weakness" stuff. However, what this guy did doesn't sound very Christian to me. Maybe you need to move or something -- find a town with better guys. Sounds like you are surrounded by clowns.And Nyoka, maybe you need to move too.
Sounds like you live in the post-apocalyptic world of "Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome"I have no intention of moving. I could meet guys like my attackers anywhere. I also don't live in fear of them or anyone else now. My Lord has given me joy, peace and a wonderful husband. I know God could not have given my husband to me if I hadn't dealt with my attacks. I see the rapes as nothing more than a problem that happened and is now over - just like I see times where money is a bit tight. If those men can't forgive themselves then that is their problem and nothing to do with me. If they came to me to apologize I would show the love of God to them like I would anyone else. These things happen no matter where you live but the important thing is how you deal with them.
(Nyoka;44507)
If those men can't forgive themselves then that is their problem and nothing to do with me. If they came to me to apologize I would show the love of God to them like I would anyone else. These things happen no matter where you live but the important thing is how you deal with them.
I'm glad that you have a husband and that you know what true love is. For the vast majority of men, rape is as foreign as beating a man within an inch of his life. Your conscience would simply not allow you to live with yourself after the fact.Anyway I would like to help, but I have to admit I can't really relate to what you guys are talking about. I can on an intellectual level, but not an emotional one. (Guys don't tend to be taken advantage of -- stalked-- raped etc..).
If those men can't forgive themselves then that is their problem and nothing to do with me. If they came to me to apologize I would show the love of God to them like I would anyone else. These things happen no matter where you live but the important thing is how you deal with them.
I'm glad that you have a husband and that you know what true love is. For the vast majority of men, rape is as foreign as beating a man within an inch of his life. Your conscience would simply not allow you to live with yourself after the fact.Anyway I would like to help, but I have to admit I can't really relate to what you guys are talking about. I can on an intellectual level, but not an emotional one. (Guys don't tend to be taken advantage of -- stalked-- raped etc..).
tim_from_pa
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(TooInvolved1;44379)
In college a guy I was casually seeing physically abused me. Another guy proceeded to take advantage of my weakness at that time. That was 10 years ago and about three hours away from where I now live. The second guy was from the Bronx or something, IOW far far away. Guess who I ran into at the grocery store! Second guy! Can you believe that?! After he took advantage of me I told him never to contact me again. He wouldn't listen so I had to call the police eventually. Once he recognized me today, he had te nerve to say "Excuse me," as if he were about to confirm my name or say hello. Idiot.I can't believe he lives near me now! Hoping he's just visiting. Is God trying to show me something?
NO, I think this is just the rain falling on the just and unjust as the bible says. However, I looked up your initiating posts and you do seem to have your share of problems that you are venting. Maybe you are catching some of that rain with spouting and channeling that into your living room and then wondering why you have such a large leak in your house? Get my drift? Well, just in case what I said went over like a lead balloon, why didn't you just smack the guy in the side of the head and then say, "I love you brother"? Maybe he would have been edified that way (knowing some guys). Not exactly being slain in the spirit, but maybe a physical reminder.
In college a guy I was casually seeing physically abused me. Another guy proceeded to take advantage of my weakness at that time. That was 10 years ago and about three hours away from where I now live. The second guy was from the Bronx or something, IOW far far away. Guess who I ran into at the grocery store! Second guy! Can you believe that?! After he took advantage of me I told him never to contact me again. He wouldn't listen so I had to call the police eventually. Once he recognized me today, he had te nerve to say "Excuse me," as if he were about to confirm my name or say hello. Idiot.I can't believe he lives near me now! Hoping he's just visiting. Is God trying to show me something?
NO, I think this is just the rain falling on the just and unjust as the bible says. However, I looked up your initiating posts and you do seem to have your share of problems that you are venting. Maybe you are catching some of that rain with spouting and channeling that into your living room and then wondering why you have such a large leak in your house? Get my drift? Well, just in case what I said went over like a lead balloon, why didn't you just smack the guy in the side of the head and then say, "I love you brother"? Maybe he would have been edified that way (knowing some guys). Not exactly being slain in the spirit, but maybe a physical reminder.
I don't believe that all guys go round wanting to rape/abuse woman. Most guys are decent men who abhor this sort of thing. The individuals that do this sort of thing are just really mucked up in their thinking - I actually feel sorry for them. RaddSpencer don't worry that you can't relate to this. It is hard to relate to a situation that you haven't experienced. That does not mean anything bad about you. There are lots of situations out there that I would not be able to relate to. The willingness to want to help is what counts. God bless you.
(followerofchrist;44442)
I would say its just a coincidence, but definitely pray about it!
I don't think that it is a coincidence. I agree that prayer is needed.It could be that there are unresolved issues that need to be dealt with in order for healing to take place. God wants us to confront our fears head on and invite him to help us overcome them. This is how we grow. Perhaps this is part of his larger plan to move into some new enterprise which fear is keeping the person from moving into. Perhaps it is something that needs to be forgiven and let go.It could be a coincidence or something that happened for a reason. The Holy Spirit knows our heart and what we need. We need to give him some credit for working in us to promote God's kingdom and our participation in it. If we are being held back from experiencing all that God has to offer then the Holy Spirit will reveal that to us in his own mysterious ways.Pray for guidance from the Holy Spirit. If the person feels threatened by this reappearance then there are outstanding issues that only God can deal with. Abuse is a terrible thing. It leaves scars and sometimes we don't even know they exist. Holding onto hate and unforgiveness damages us and affects our relationships with people who are not even involved in the original situation and long after they have passed.
I would say its just a coincidence, but definitely pray about it!
I don't think that it is a coincidence. I agree that prayer is needed.It could be that there are unresolved issues that need to be dealt with in order for healing to take place. God wants us to confront our fears head on and invite him to help us overcome them. This is how we grow. Perhaps this is part of his larger plan to move into some new enterprise which fear is keeping the person from moving into. Perhaps it is something that needs to be forgiven and let go.It could be a coincidence or something that happened for a reason. The Holy Spirit knows our heart and what we need. We need to give him some credit for working in us to promote God's kingdom and our participation in it. If we are being held back from experiencing all that God has to offer then the Holy Spirit will reveal that to us in his own mysterious ways.Pray for guidance from the Holy Spirit. If the person feels threatened by this reappearance then there are outstanding issues that only God can deal with. Abuse is a terrible thing. It leaves scars and sometimes we don't even know they exist. Holding onto hate and unforgiveness damages us and affects our relationships with people who are not even involved in the original situation and long after they have passed.
(TooInvolved1;44379)
I can't believe he lives near me now! Hoping he's just visiting. Is God trying to show me something?
In my heart I believe God wants you to Forgive him.
Matthew 6:14-15 (King James Version) 14 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: 15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
I can't believe he lives near me now! Hoping he's just visiting. Is God trying to show me something?
In my heart I believe God wants you to Forgive him.
Matthew 6:14-15 (King James Version) 14 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: 15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
You guys are right! I don't think it was coincidence! And I do need to forgive him. When he called after me, it almost made me sick.
(TooInvolved1;44773)
You guys are right! I don't think it was coincidence! And I do need to forgive him. When he called after me, it almost made me sick.
I have sent you a PM. My heart goes out to you. I know exactly where you are at as I have been there. I am praying for you.ray3: I wish I was with you now to support you through this.
You guys are right! I don't think it was coincidence! And I do need to forgive him. When he called after me, it almost made me sick.
I have sent you a PM. My heart goes out to you. I know exactly where you are at as I have been there. I am praying for you.
ray3: I wish I was with you now to support you through this.(TooInvolved1;44773)
You guys are right! I don't think it was coincidence! And I do need to forgive him. When he called after me, it almost made me sick.
remember tooInvolved there is a difference between forgiving and forgetting you will never forget and God understands that but forgiveness in your your heart is another thing you forgive so you can put this behind you but to forget would be impossable. You dont have to tell him you forgive him you just need to turn it over to God in your heart
You guys are right! I don't think it was coincidence! And I do need to forgive him. When he called after me, it almost made me sick.
remember tooInvolved there is a difference between forgiving and forgetting you will never forget and God understands that but forgiveness in your your heart is another thing you forgive so you can put this behind you but to forget would be impossable. You dont have to tell him you forgive him you just need to turn it over to God in your heart
(kriss;44800)
remember tooInvolved there is a difference between forgiving and forgetting you will never forget and God understands that but forgiveness in your your heart is another thing you forgive so you can put this behind you but to forget would be impossable. You dont have to tell him you forgive him you just need to turn it over to God in your heart
You are right kriss. I haven't forgotten it but now I only think about it when some else can be helped by my experience. In fact until this thread I hadn't thought about it for years. I don't try to forget it. I just don't think of it. I wasn't able to ever tell the two that raped me that I had forgiven them but that doesn't matter as I needed to forgive them more for me than for them. Forgiveness is about letting go of the anger, pain and torment that the situation gives us - no matter what the situation is. It is about not letting the situation have a controlling influence in our lives. At least that is what I believe.
remember tooInvolved there is a difference between forgiving and forgetting you will never forget and God understands that but forgiveness in your your heart is another thing you forgive so you can put this behind you but to forget would be impossable. You dont have to tell him you forgive him you just need to turn it over to God in your heart
You are right kriss. I haven't forgotten it but now I only think about it when some else can be helped by my experience. In fact until this thread I hadn't thought about it for years. I don't try to forget it. I just don't think of it. I wasn't able to ever tell the two that raped me that I had forgiven them but that doesn't matter as I needed to forgive them more for me than for them. Forgiveness is about letting go of the anger, pain and torment that the situation gives us - no matter what the situation is. It is about not letting the situation have a controlling influence in our lives. At least that is what I believe.
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