The loss of a loved one to death is a very painful experience. In some cultures, people express their feelings openly. On the other hand, in some parts of the world, notably in northern Europe and Britain, people, especially men, have been conditioned to hide their feelings, to suppress their emotions.
We should never hold in what has to come out though. The bible has many examples of great men who openly expressed grief at the loss of a loved one. King David mourned the loss of his murdered son Amnon. In fact, he “wept with a very great weeping.” (2 Samuel 13:28-39)
Jesus also wept openly when he heard his friend Lazarus had died. (John 11:30-38) So death affects us inwardly and must be expressed outwardly to help the grieving process.
God is our maker and he knows why death is such a terrible experience for us. He also gives us advice on how to deal with grief.
Talking it through- “My soul certainly feels a loathing toward my life. I will give vent to [Hebrew, “loose”] my concern about myself. I will speak in the bitterness of my soul!” (Job 1:2, 18, 19; 10:1) Job could no longer restrain his concern. He needed to let it loose; he had to “speak.”
Dealing with Guilt - When Jacob had been tricked into believing his son had been killed, he felt guilty because himself had sent Joseph out to check on the welfare of his brothers. ‘Why did I send Joseph out alone? Why did I send him out into an area abounding with wild beasts?’—Genesis 37:33-35.
Realizing that guilt—real or imagined—is a normal grief reaction but Gods word helps us to realize that no matter how much we love another person, we cannot control his or her life, nor can we prevent “time and unforeseen occurrence” from befalling those we love. (Ecclesiastes 9:11)
Anger is another emotion felt during periods of the grieving process. Anger can be destructive as Proverbs 14:29, 30 warns.... so its important to let anger go by talking it through with a friend. Recognize the anger and what is causing you to feel angry, then be willing to let it go.
Prayer is also a great comforter in times of distress. God knows us and what we are going through and he is available 24/7. Psalm 55:22, Psalm 34:18, Philippians 4:6-7
But there is another way to help the grieving process. Its understanding that death will not be a permanent state of being....those who have died will be released from deaths hold. Just as God raised Jesus from the dead, so too will he raise all of mankind from the dead.
1 Corinthians 15:32 If, like men, I have fought with wild beasts at Eph′e‧sus, of what good is it to me? If the dead are not to be raised up, “let us eat and drink, for tomorrow we are to die.'
1Thessalonians 4:13 Moreover, brothers, we do not want YOU to be ignorant concerning those who are sleeping [in death]; that YOU may not sorrow just as the rest also do who have no hope. 14 For if our faith is that Jesus died and rose again, so, too, those who have fallen asleep [in death] through Jesus God will bring with him
John 6:40 For this is the will of my Father, that everyone that beholds the Son and exercises faith in him should have everlasting life, and I will resurrect him at the last day.”
John 11:23 Jesus said to her: “Your brother will rise.” 24 Martha said to him: “I know he will rise in the resurrection on the last day.” 25 Jesus said to her: “I am the resurrection and the life. He that exercises faith in me, even though he dies, will come to life
We will see our dead loved ones again in the future. They will be restored to life under Gods kingdom rule right here on earth. At that time, death will be no more because God will undo all the pain and hurt that death has caused over the millenniums, mankind will be free from the suffering of death forever.
Revelation 21:3 With that I heard a loud voice from the throne say: “Look! The tent of God is with mankind, and he will reside with them, and they will be his peoples. And God himself will be with them. 4 And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.”
We should never hold in what has to come out though. The bible has many examples of great men who openly expressed grief at the loss of a loved one. King David mourned the loss of his murdered son Amnon. In fact, he “wept with a very great weeping.” (2 Samuel 13:28-39)
Jesus also wept openly when he heard his friend Lazarus had died. (John 11:30-38) So death affects us inwardly and must be expressed outwardly to help the grieving process.
God is our maker and he knows why death is such a terrible experience for us. He also gives us advice on how to deal with grief.
Talking it through- “My soul certainly feels a loathing toward my life. I will give vent to [Hebrew, “loose”] my concern about myself. I will speak in the bitterness of my soul!” (Job 1:2, 18, 19; 10:1) Job could no longer restrain his concern. He needed to let it loose; he had to “speak.”
Dealing with Guilt - When Jacob had been tricked into believing his son had been killed, he felt guilty because himself had sent Joseph out to check on the welfare of his brothers. ‘Why did I send Joseph out alone? Why did I send him out into an area abounding with wild beasts?’—Genesis 37:33-35.
Realizing that guilt—real or imagined—is a normal grief reaction but Gods word helps us to realize that no matter how much we love another person, we cannot control his or her life, nor can we prevent “time and unforeseen occurrence” from befalling those we love. (Ecclesiastes 9:11)
Anger is another emotion felt during periods of the grieving process. Anger can be destructive as Proverbs 14:29, 30 warns.... so its important to let anger go by talking it through with a friend. Recognize the anger and what is causing you to feel angry, then be willing to let it go.
Prayer is also a great comforter in times of distress. God knows us and what we are going through and he is available 24/7. Psalm 55:22, Psalm 34:18, Philippians 4:6-7
But there is another way to help the grieving process. Its understanding that death will not be a permanent state of being....those who have died will be released from deaths hold. Just as God raised Jesus from the dead, so too will he raise all of mankind from the dead.
1 Corinthians 15:32 If, like men, I have fought with wild beasts at Eph′e‧sus, of what good is it to me? If the dead are not to be raised up, “let us eat and drink, for tomorrow we are to die.'
1Thessalonians 4:13 Moreover, brothers, we do not want YOU to be ignorant concerning those who are sleeping [in death]; that YOU may not sorrow just as the rest also do who have no hope. 14 For if our faith is that Jesus died and rose again, so, too, those who have fallen asleep [in death] through Jesus God will bring with him
John 6:40 For this is the will of my Father, that everyone that beholds the Son and exercises faith in him should have everlasting life, and I will resurrect him at the last day.”
John 11:23 Jesus said to her: “Your brother will rise.” 24 Martha said to him: “I know he will rise in the resurrection on the last day.” 25 Jesus said to her: “I am the resurrection and the life. He that exercises faith in me, even though he dies, will come to life
We will see our dead loved ones again in the future. They will be restored to life under Gods kingdom rule right here on earth. At that time, death will be no more because God will undo all the pain and hurt that death has caused over the millenniums, mankind will be free from the suffering of death forever.
Revelation 21:3 With that I heard a loud voice from the throne say: “Look! The tent of God is with mankind, and he will reside with them, and they will be his peoples. And God himself will be with them. 4 And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.”
