Feeling pretty under attack today

[TLHKAJ]

Scripture says that if a believer can be free of such things, then they should use that freedom.

Could you give the scripture reference for this, please? For some who are in this type of situation, it might be a spouse who treats them this way. In these cases, it may not be so cut and dry as far as separating from someone who is emotionally or otherwise abusive.

 

[Enoch111]

I don't get upset about small things, but the person was upset with me for not having the right socks available.

That is ludicrous. What's right for someone else is not necessarily right for you. So just hang up a Christmas stocking with a note which says "This is for all the complaints about wrong socks! Santa with bring the right pair next Christmas!"

 

[Addy]

That is ludicrous. What's right for someone else is not necessarily right for you. So just hang up a Christmas stocking with a note which says "This is for all the complaints about wrong socks! Santa with bring the right pair next Christmas!"

That was actually funny.... there's hope for you yet Mr. Enoch... LOL

 

[Hidden In Him]

Could you give the scripture reference for this, please? For some who are in this type of situation, it might be a spouse who treats them this way. In these cases, it may not be so cut and dry as far as separating from someone who is emotionally or otherwise abusive.

1 Corinthians 7:21. Was used in reference to employment. Would not have been used in reference to marriage.

 

[VictoryinJesus]

I'm having a little bit of an emotional breakdown because I was getting messages today from someone that seemed like something was really wrong, so I had a minor panic attack and asked if I should be worried because it was giving me anxiety and I was trying to do good at working on stuff, and a FLOOD of messages came back about how horrible and selfish I am for having a panic attack.

I was trying to work on stuff today and doing well, but basically there's a lot of verbal abuse and gaslighting in my life. Sorry, I know that's excessive but I am very upset right now and not handling it very well.

This is the first time sharing it with other believers and I'm nervous about it.

read your post multiple times and wanted to reply but not really knowing what to say. I used to have panic attacks so horrible I couldn’t go out in public becoming a hermit. Sometimes I would get in the car just to drive trying to flee the dread and fear that took over, but there was no where to flee from that dread and fear. I still get depressed but can’t remember the last panic attack. Like you I’ve wanted so bad to talk to someone, to scream, to cry, to beg, to admit needing help because I sometimes feel like I might be going insane. Honestly my marriage has been in trouble for a while now. If you could see into our home you might say we are the biggest fakes claiming to be Christ followers. My husband says it is all in my mind and my core message and I hear things that are not said. Have heard constantly how I’m not pleasing, how I’m a disappointment, of satan, weak and do not have the mind of Christ, make up stuff and twist his message to my advantage, and insane...maybe I am. I’m just as condemning literally growling and gritting my teeth. We spend most of our time together kicking each other constantly and attacking each other’s faith and tearing each other down in proving “no God”. And I do not know how to stop it. It is out of daily life I think things like accusing homosexuals for their union or relationship NOT displaying the love of Christ with His body because they are two males...i wonder what right does a man and woman have to say this when their marriage displays no love, mercy, grace, or forgiveness. It is not just us but condemning and tearing down others so much so I’m asking where is the building up what has been torn down? Sharing all this with you because I get it ...sometimes I doubt God, or love or mercy or forgiveness. It seems like a message to unrealistic, to unreal to be true. I can relate to where it becomes hard to breathe, becoming depressed, hopeless. I want a happy marriage. I want to witness a miracle. What gets me is people going door to door to get others “saved”...while at the same time there is this attack so often brutally to get or show others “unsaved”... so much so there seems to be a slaughter in proving there is no Christ or no Faith. Point is, I don’t handle it well either.

 

[DuckieLady]

@FluffyYellowDuck They'll get over it, sis. People who say insensitive things don't realize it, but they are the ones being selfish and self-focused. It happens. We all have those times. Just show them some grace, step back, and pray ....lean on the Lord, and allow Him to surround you with His loving arms.

I'm sorry you're experiencing panic attacks. I understand. I've experienced them pretty severely at times. PTSD, anxiety, etc ....we can't always prevent these because we live in a world where sudden jolts (traumas, losses, etc) happen. Just do your best to nourish yourself in Him ...He will bring you through.

Just wanted to reference here really quickly and suggest, considering your experiences that you've posted here, C-PTSD is really worth looking into because PTSD tends to be something that is experienced for a short period of time. A car accident, for example. C-PTSD is long term trauma and usually develops in childhood.

There is a pastor that has a lot of courses on C-PTSD AND addiction (because they tend to go together, not for everyone but if not just ignore that part) Anyway, he is under FindingFreedomMedia and I have used a lot of his stuff and it's been really helpful- along for someone else that I know.

My anxiety used to be REALLY bad but for me personally it was more of a combination of B-12 deficiency anemia, soy intolerance, and COFFEE. I'd been hospitalized at least twice for "gallbladder pain" that came with extreme anxiety, but doctors couldn't figure it out. Eventually spent every other day just thinking I was dying and not being able to move for a couple of days. Did a Daniel Fast for totally different reasons (I was mentally in a bad place) which ended up working as an elimination diet at home and turned out the culprit was soy. So having a nervous breakdown and thinking fasting would fix all of my problems might of unintentionally saved my life. I had to give up coffee because 1-2 cups and I'd just be having heart palpitations all day.

But to clear things up, I am not scripturally bound. :) (Not married/still celibate because of my beliefs- which I think greatly contributes to their resentment and anger) But it's been a tricky situation and since I spent so long being sick it would have been impossible for me to work on anything. I feel like I'm moving a little bit ahead now by working on stuff.

But in the meantime, I try to just go day to day and do the best that I can. It's just that sometimes it's hard to stand up and feel pushed down at the same time.

 

[DuckieLady]

My husband says it is all in my mind and my core message and I hear things that are not said. Have heard constantly how I’m not pleasing, how I’m a disappointment, of satan, weak and do not have the mind of Christ, make up stuff and twist his message to my advantage, and insane...maybe I am.

Do you mean that you're hearing voices or is your husband the type of person that would be denying things that he said? (Which I believe is also
is called "crazymaking.") I am sorry you are going through that. It sounds like you are experiencing a lot of anguish but also sounds like you're not being heard as much as you need to be.

 

[VictoryinJesus]

Do you mean that you're hearing voices or is your husband the type of person that would be denying things that he said? (Which I believe is also
is called "crazymaking.") I am sorry you are going through that. It sounds like you are experiencing a lot of anguish but also sounds like you're not being heard as much as you need to be.

we both speak death over one another. I’m not hearing voices just conflicting messages. Reading His word and hearing His love and something new, but then that old past voice. So much so is the conflict between the voices that it becomes which to believe. Yes, I have a core message but this world seems to validate that core message ...with the right words where it seems impossible to get out from under that message. For example what you said “It's just that sometimes it's hard to stand up and feel pushed down at the same time.” Like being held under water and drowning but at the same time struggling to surface or break through for air.

 

[DuckieLady]

we both speak death over one another. I’m not hearing voices just conflicting messages. Reading His word and hearing His love and something new, but then that old past voice. So much so is the conflict between the voices that it becomes which to believe. Yes, I have a core message but this world seems to validate that core message ...with the right words where it seems impossible to get out from under that message. For example what you said “It's just that sometimes it's hard to stand up and feel pushed down at the same time.” Like being held under water and drowning but at the same time struggling to surface or break through for air.

Okay. It sounds like you're saying that you are trying to hear the newer things, but the difficult things from the past linger around and make it difficult to move forward. Is that right?

I think you and I both would benefit from some self-love, self-pampering time to get some breathing room.

 

[VictoryinJesus]

Okay. It sounds like you're saying that you are trying to hear the newer things, but the difficult things from the past linger around and make it difficult to move forward. Is that right?


I think you and I both would benefit from some self-love, self-pampering time to get some breathing room.

“It sounds like you're saying that you are trying to hear the newer things, but the difficult things from the past linger around and make it difficult to move forward.”
yes, yet maybe for both of us. Last thing I want is to throw my husband under the bus. Which does make it impossible to talk about it. Not here, not with my family so it stays bottled up. He is an awesome father, husband and partner which makes his words so weighty. As possibly my own towards him. Mostly posted here to let you know you are not alone in feeling overwhelmed. And also to let so many that know us both here ....realize we are in trouble and need prayer.

 

[Hidden In Him]

read your post multiple times and wanted to reply but not really knowing what to say. I used to have panic attacks so horrible I couldn’t go out in public becoming a hermit. Sometimes I would get in the car just to drive trying to flee the dread and fear that took over, but there was no where to flee from that dread and fear. I still get depressed but can’t remember the last panic attack. Like you I’ve wanted so bad to talk to someone, to scream, to cry, to beg, to admit needing help because I sometimes feel like I might be going insane. Honestly my marriage has been in trouble for a while now. If you could see into our home you might say we are the biggest fakes claiming to be Christ followers. My husband says it is all in my mind and my core message and I hear things that are not said. Have heard constantly how I’m not pleasing, how I’m a disappointment, of satan, weak and do not have the mind of Christ, make up stuff and twist his message to my advantage, and insane...maybe I am. I’m just as condemning literally growling and gritting my teeth. We spend most of our time together kicking each other constantly and attacking each other’s faith and tearing each other down in proving “no God”. And I do not know how to stop it. It is out of daily life I think things like accusing homosexuals for their union or relationship NOT displaying the love of Christ with His body because they are two males...i wonder what right does a man and woman have to say this when their marriage displays no love, mercy, grace, or forgiveness. It is not just us but condemning and tearing down others so much so I’m asking where is the building up what has been torn down? Sharing all this with you because I get it ...sometimes I doubt God, or love or mercy or forgiveness. It seems like a message to unrealistic, to unreal to be true. I can relate to where it becomes hard to breathe, becoming depressed, hopeless. I want a happy marriage. I want to witness a miracle. What gets me is people going door to door to get others “saved”...while at the same time there is this attack so often brutally to get or show others “unsaved”... so much so there seems to be a slaughter in proving there is no Christ or no Faith. Point is, I don’t handle it well either.

Wow... That's really a post, Victory. I'm sorry to read this.

No way am I gonna give much advice here. You weren't even posting this to me. Just thought I'd say that fighting needs to be kept to a minimum, but at least you are real with each other, and that keeps the door open to healing if you can see each other in a new light. I need to pray for your husband, that he can be the best man possible for you. I honestly don't know what I would do if I were in his shoes, but it certainly can't be easy for either of you going through those things.

But it says to think on positive things, so that should be your focus as often as possible. Sounds like maybe your anxiety attacks aren't as bad as they used to be at least. :)

 

[Hidden In Him]

I think you and I both would benefit from some self-love, self-pampering time to get some breathing room.

I will actually do this some. I don't have near the problems that Victory has, or even you probably. But I will get to these places where I feel like there's nothing good to live for. When it happens, I tend to close off, and I will revert back to my childhood. I'll stay home and just watch old Charlie Brown cartoons because they remind me of when I was a little boy and my life was simpler and I felt more protected. I wouldn't see a lot wrong with living there if things were more constant all the time. It's a type of survival mechanism when you are in trauma. And in that environment, I would just spend more time praying to God.

 

[Pearl]

I'm having a little bit of an emotional breakdown because I was getting messages today from someone that seemed like something was really wrong, so I had a minor panic attack and asked if I should be worried because it was giving me anxiety and I was trying to do good at working on stuff, and a FLOOD of messages came back about how horrible and selfish I am for having a panic attack.

I was trying to work on stuff today and doing well, but basically there's a lot of verbal abuse and gaslighting in my life. Sorry, I know that's excessive but I am very upset right now and not handling it very well.

This is the first time sharing it with other believers and I'm nervous about it.

I think we have all had days when we feel we are under attack. So remember Jesus is on your side and focus on him. Play uplifting music to keep the bad thoughts at bay. And pray.

 

[DuckieLady]

I will actually do this some. I don't have near the problems that Victory has, or even you probably. But I will get to these places where I feel like there's nothing good to live for. When it happens, I tend to close off, and I will revert back to my childhood. I'll stay home and just watch old Charlie Brown cartoons because they remind me of when I was a little boy and my life was simpler and I felt more protected. I wouldn't see a lot wrong with living there if things were more constant all the time. It's a type of survival mechanism when you are in trauma. And in that environment, I would just spend more time praying to God.

It helps. Even if you are in a happy marriage or just life in general, I still believe in the rubber band technique. It's the theory that the rubber band stretching symbolizes the amount of time together and the more you pull the rubber band it eventually snaps. But when you let go a little bit it loosens up and stays intact.

I have spent the last few years praying to God. Four years ago, I was an alcoholic and a witch. I had one experience that led to a lot of emotional pain and got me desperate enough to cry out to God for him to help and fix it. I was laying in bed and then I had a vision of this hand reaching out of this indigo kind of light down at me. I woke up "knowing" everything I needed to do and then frantically paced around the room going, "GOD IS REAL. GOD IS REAL. GOD IS REAL." I needed to trust him and give up witchcraft, those were the two that stood out the most. I did that but I messed up a lot along the way- there's a lot of deception in the church today. I went in a lot of wrong directions.

Then I went on a long journey. I sobered up, quit smoking marijuana, and then went on this long, long journey. Four years of waiting and constant studying and reading the Bible. Went through a lot of dramatic moments in my own mind and took things too far a lot, and did a lot of crazy things until I understood the meaning of "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."

That time alone is important.

I've started collecting my kids the Charlie Brown comic books. We only have two but it will grow eventually. ;)

 

[Hidden In Him]

Then I went on a long journey. I sobered up, quit smoking marijuana, and then went on this long, long journey. Four years of waiting and constant studying and reading the Bible. Went through a lot of dramatic moments in my own mind and took things too far a lot, and did a lot of crazy things until I understood the meaning of "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."

:). You have a good strong testimony. I had a sense about you, from the start, but especially when you started using a personal pic for your avatar. You come off as guarded, but with a very good heart - a soft heart. And that's a wonderful thing. That is probably what the Devil is after destroying. He wants to get you going in the opposite direction again from where God has been taking you. And that is why the Spirit of power, love, and a sound mind is so important. Fear makes you focus on failure, weakness, suffering... power, love and a sound mind keep you focused on the good, on what God can do, on the positives in yourself and others.

You have a LOT going for you, so just keep fighting. If you do, you will dig out to this place where you are increasingly protected emotionally and spiritually, and both internally and in the environment you build for yourself as well. Just keep believing in His ability to take care of you. If you keep trusting Him, you will be rewarded more and more for doing so.

 

[Pearl]

 

[Pearl]

All of Psalm 18 is wonderful when you are feeling under attack. Proclaim it.

 

[DuckieLady]

:). You have a good strong testimony. I had a sense about you, from the start, but especially when you started using a personal pic for your avatar. You come off as guarded, but with a very good heart - a soft heart. And that's a wonderful thing. That is probably what the Devil is after destroying. He wants to get you going in the opposite direction again from where God has been taking you. And that is why the Spirit of power, love, and a sound mind is so important. Fear makes you focus on failure, weakness, suffering... power, love and a sound mind keep you focused on the good, on what God can do, on the positives in yourself and others.

You have a LOT going for you, so just keep fighting. If you do, you will dig out to this place where you are increasingly protected emotionally and spiritually, and both internally and in the environment you build for yourself as well. Just keep believing in His ability to take care of you. If you keep trusting Him, you will be rewarded more and more for doing so.

Thank you! I believe that and I think you're right.

I'm not one for prophecies, despite having had a few accurate ones myself, but there was ONE man who prophesied over me when I was 14-15 and explained everything up to now accurately, including the visitation. The only thing that really throws me off about it was he said I would be leading a lot of people through the streets in like worship or something like that.

I don't really remember the whole thing but I'm introvert and that sounds like a bit much. I've had three different people tell me a variation of that before and it just seems really excessive. But apparently he made it sound like I would be well off afterwards. I have always had a feeling that God didn't let me go through everything for no reason and would eventually bring me out just fine and at his time as long as I am in obedience and trusting in him.

I think things will be cool.

 

[WaterSong]

Holding you in prayer fluffy. :) (HUGS)
I wouldn't sweat someone who called panic attacks selfish. Their thinking to say that to someone who may suffer panic attacks is what is selfish! And aholish, if you don't mind me sharing.

I had a panic attack once. Unless you've been there you really can't describe the feeling but it isn't something I'd want to experience again. Hubby has them from time to time.

 

[Truman]

I'm gonna take up ALL the air

;)

Well, you better not do that...I need some!