Huge falling-out with a supposed christian friend, feeling awful

[rockytopva]

The two greatest commandments....

1. To Love God
2. To Love People

It wasn't...

1. To be accepted of God
2. To be accepted of People

All we can do is reach out and show our love for God and for people. It may not feel like we have gotten anything in return for it. But at least we did our part.

 

[amigo de christo]

Those who don't know nuthin are always quick to be of no help at all.

Verily verily i say unto thee and they are often fast to accuse us of what it is they do .
T hey will allow urepentant sinners to hang around and within their churches for hours
, days , weeks , months , years and etc .
And say speak not , judge not , say not co rrect not .
But have you ever noticed that when one cometh to speak TRUTH
ALL of a sudden , as fast as greased lightning , THEY THEN BEGIN TO CORRECT .
But not the unrepentant sinners , BUT THE ONE CORRECTING THE SIN . oopsy , we got big problems in the house .

 

[amigo de christo]

Todays generation of christendom
have long sat under the , SAY nothing , do nothing , correct nothing motto .
And even allow unrepentant sin to remain .
Even allowing unrepentant sinners to even speak and ev en teach now in the church .
We correct them not , they say , ITS GOD job .
FUNNY .
How come when a man comes into such a church and perhaps b egins to read words
from a bible , ALL OF A SUD DEN correct not , say not
BECOMES JUDGE THAT PIECE OF DUN G and get that hater OUT of this church .
YOU ALL got no idea what a harlots love has done to ya churches . TOTAL REBELLION TO GOD , TO CHRIST
and upmost hatred towards his saints and only more and more leaven NOW being called good .
YA GOT DUPED folks . bible time

 

[Marilyn C]

Hi folks,

I feel really awful.
I had a huge irreversible falling-out with a christian who I believed was a friend who I have known for over 20 years.
This is a long story and describing it all would take pretty long.

.....


I just fear what if God is now totally angry at me? How shall I know?


This is how it ALWAYS is when I have problems with other people. I am ALWAYS insecure and wreck my brain trying to "figure" out if I am right or not.

Even when I feel like somebody clearly did me wrong then I still have to go through this all the time trying to reassure myself. It's awful.

Hi friedice,

Thank you for sharing your story of pain in relationship. Now I have never talked to someone from Germany so I am looking forward to maybe talking with you. I do feel for you in regard to having trusted someone, looked up to them and then they actually show their true colours as it were. Honesty was lacking and you got very burned for it was over years it seemed that you related.

I would put it down to a life lesson to be careful with others and know that they too are not perfect and going through traumas of their own, though perhaps hidden.

Perhaps the other person wanted to be able to help you and see changes that they enabled. When they heard difficult responses they blamed you instead of realizing that their way of `helping` wasn`t helping you.

Praying, Marilyn.

 

[Aunty Jane]

@friedice, have you received professional help for your OCD and anger issues?

I understand how difficult it is to live in a world where people’s behavior is almost never to our liking, and injustice, political corruption and incompetence is hard to live with. Things that are beyond our control can make us feel frustrated and angry at times….but seriously, will our venting and continually complaining about these things, make one scrap of difference to the way the world is? We can’t change the world or the people in it.

The only person we can change is ourselves. Can you work on distancing yourself from the issues that seem to constantly bother you?….knowing that you can’t really change anything.…and your constant venting is just wearing your friend out.…not to mention how upset you are yourself….but for what? Is it worth constantly complaining about?

Can you work on putting things into perspective, so that they don’t cause you as much distress? Tell yourself that’s just the way the world is…..and try to make being around you more pleasant by being mindful of how your negative attitude and words affects others.

Having been in the position of your friend, I can sympathize about someone unloading their anger and negativity on a regular basis….it’s like a dripping tap, that brings the person on the receiving end, to the “end of their rope”. They know what you’re dealing with and they don’t want to add to your problems…but sometimes they snap….they just do.

All I saw in your post was your concentration on getting an apology from your friend. Perhaps it was you who needed to give an apology to them?…and just let it go…..with OCD I know that’s hard…..but you can work on it.

People with mental health issues sometimes wear people out because there is no end in sight….it’s a daily problem for you, but it doesn’t have to be a daily problem for those you are venting to…..so please don’t be so hard on your friend. Try to see things from their point of view….not just your own.