A lot of this hangs on the definition of what a Spiritual Gift IS. I'll give you my working definition:
A true Spiritual Gift (unique for the individual member of the Body of Christ) is a special gift to be used in edifying, uplifting, encouraging, enhancing, and furthering the Body of Christ. That special gift is one that can be consciously exercized at the sole discression of the recipient of that special gift.
That is to say, if a person must wait for the Holy Spirit to come on them in order to begin praying or singing in a different tongue then it is, by definition, NOT a spiritual gift, but a monergistic work of the Holy Spirit upon that person. That person is not exercizing a gift of their own free will but a subserviant vessel being used by the Holy Spirit.
Spiritual Gifts oft times are mundane, like Organization, or Fellowship, yet our greedy spirit yearns for the glamor and glitz of the gifts denied us at this present age. Just like a child wanting to use the scissors before they are ready. When they get hold of them everything looks like it needs cutting and many times they end up cutting themselves.
When we are ready for the sharpness of the Miracle Gifts the Lord will return them.