Understanding MPD/DID & SRA/MK

[truthquest]

That's exactly why I made that post and shared my experience. But I don't want my words to sound like I'm saying your experience is wrong because it wasn't exactly like mine. We both know we have a lot in common. Every survivor shares a great deal in common with other survivors. But we also each have many differences. I apologize if my words came across as sounding like I didn't think your experience with VR was legitimate. It certainly is, and I know other survivors who have experienced VR being used in the way you described. That just wasn't the way I experienced it.

Yes, we have a lot in common. Even in being told that I was special and chosen and there are other survivors who have said that they were told the same thing. But they didn't mean that in a good way because everything to them is backward and upside down where good is bad and bad is good. That's just the way they think and believe. They would say, you're doing so good, good job, and the next minute they would torture me and do all kinds of evil to me. There is nothing good about them because their master is deceptive and evil and is a liar and so it stands to reason that his servants would be the same way.

Jesus said it clearly about those like them: John 8:44 You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out his desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, refusing to uphold the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, because he is a liar and the father of lies.

Matthew 12:34 You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks.

1Tim. 4:1 But the [Holy] Spirit explicitly and unmistakably declares that in later times some will turn away from the faith, paying attention instead to deceitful and seductive spirits and doctrines of demons,

I feel so much anger toward the Satanic cult. So much anger not only about what they've done to me but also to so many other people especially helpless and defenseless children and babies and they continue to do it. They keep getting away with it.

Luke 17:2 It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he be cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones.

Matthew 25:41 "Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels.

 

[TLHKAJ]

@Mayflower I just want to throw some facts out there. I know you have mentioned having alters, and I have conversed with a few myself. Are you aware that you don't just have alters without trauma? A scary movie or story isn't enough to create alters. Actual trauma beginning by age 6 or 7 is required in order for the mind to split.

 

[truthquest]

This won't leave me alone today so I'm going to try to write it out.

I was about four years old. After my mother left my father and met my stepfather, we moved to Florida because my stepfather had relatives there. We were having a hard time surviving and I guess somebody reported it to children's services. My two sisters, brother and I were placed into an orphanage. One day shortly afterward, this man and woman came to the door and wanted to take me. I didn't know who they were. They were total strangers. But apparently they knew the woman in charge there because she just handed me over to them.

They took me to their house. They told me that I had to k*** a rabbit before they would take me back to the orphanage. I kept refusing and wouldn't do it. I spent days there, not sure how many. They would threaten and scare me in different ways. They wouldn't let me eat or drink anything. They were just constantly acting evil. Every day the woman would take me outside to the rabbit and give me an axe and told me to k*** it. I wouldn't do it.

Then finally one day she took me outside and told me to do it and I refused. She was really angry and frustrated. She forced me to hold the axe and put her hand over my hand and forced it that way. I was just crushed and heartbroken and started crying. She told me to shut up over and over. Then they took me back to the orphanage.

Maybe this is why after that when we had rabbit traps in the woods, I would set the rabbits free.

 

[lilygrace]

this site has been strange for me today. i cant even like posts sometimes.
the phrase means that i am supposed to thrive and stay put. it is even used and involved with God's will

 

[lilygrace]

You're welcome.

If it's coming from inside, it is most likely part of an alter's programming. You could ask her what that phrase means to her.

I have heard things from my alters that sounded just like a normal phrase ....or things that seemed cryptic ...which I've never seen written in Fritz Springmeier and Cisco Wheeler's books, and never heard other survivors mention them. But I knew they were part of our programming. I once overheard an alter repeating... "Believe NOT to believe." It was denial programming. So becoming aware of how our alters were programmed is an opportunity to help them overcome and to know the truth. When they share things like that, it is their way of breaking through a barrier and that's a very good sign they want freedom.

have you heard of other survivors referring to the phrase i used? yours sounds familiar too from somewhere




sorry

 

[TLHKAJ]

have you heard of other survivors referring to the phrase i used? yours sounds familiar too from somewhere




sorry

I don't think I have, but it's so typical of what the cult does...taking an everyday phrase and giving it a double bind meaning.

If I come across anything, I'll let you know. But I'd like to say ...always take what you hear from inside. They're sharing their truth with you. It has bearing whether I've heard it before or not.

 

[TLHKAJ]

the phrase means that i am supposed to thrive and stay put. it is even used and involved with God's will

I figured as much. The religious connotation, similar to "be content with such things as you have" ...so much like what I experienced within the cult (Christian front) church.

It's great news that alters are sharing things with you. This is progress.

 

[Jostler]

@Mayflower,

Google Image Result for https://humanjourney.us/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/Tablet_of_Shamash_relief.jpg

Does the circle with a line look anything like what you see in the right hand of the "deity" in that Summerian carving?

 

[TLHKAJ]

Hi jostler... it was this, only in blood on the wall. But it isn't very clear. I don't know. Can't type it. O, with a diagonal dash through it. I'm not sure if it is real, but it wasn't a story either.

Ø - Wikipedia

Do you have a gut sense of what it means? I could say what I think it could mean, but I think somewhere inside yourself, there is a knowing of what it means.

 

[Jostler]

A circle with a diagonal line through the circle reminds me of the "do not enter " symbol we commonly see on road signs. A line drawn tangent to the circle, might have a more esoteric kind of symbolism. The use of blood to create the symbol is certainly significant :/

 

[Jostler]

What is that?

That is just an ancient carving and depiction of Shamash...a Sumerian " god". The modern cult still adheres to the teachings of those ancient ",mystery religions " the names have changed through the ages, but they still adhere to the same ritualistic/magical ideas and worship those same spirits, even if the names they call them have changed.

 

[TLHKAJ]

It is very foggy. Been bothering me off and on for a week. Just remember the chain on the bed, a knife, candles, and blood on the bed/that symbol on one of the boarded windows and my mom and dad there. I do not remember anything or else or what that means. They were just watching me. There was quite a bit of blood though but no animal I could see.I do not remember anything after that.

It took a lot of courage to share this, sister. Take good care tonight, as I know this is an intense recollection.

Where do you think the blood came from?

 

[Jostler]

Mayflower, I think its important to keep reminding ourselves that it is the Lord who reveals truth. He certainly knows what actually happened to install these memories in your mind. Do your best to just trust Him, take the memory to Him in prayer, and ask Him to reveal the full truth behind the memoy.

 

[TLHKAJ]

We used to have this dog who was killed by a drunk driver on July 4th. I was really young. I'm not sure if it was that, but I've thought about the dog too simultaneously.

Could be that the anniversary having just passed brought the dog to mind.

How do you feel about asking the Lord to reveal to you what you need to know about the memory you just shared?

 

[TLHKAJ]

It was hard, because I watched the dog get run over. The symbol on the wall (boarded up window) and being on the bed was what is confusing.

Any idea how old you were in that memory?

 

[Jostler]

Mayflower, going to the Lord and saying "show me the truth " can be a fearful thing. That's pretty normal. He might show us something we really struggle to deal with. We have to trust Him to deal with the consequences and that can be hard to do. But, try to remember that no matter what He reveals, He knew it all before we did. No matter what it is, He called you, saved you, and promised to keep you. He isn't going to let you go now. Sometimes it is necessary for Him to show us the truth He already knows about us...no matter how shocking the revelation is to us, it's no shock to Him.

 

[Jostler]

Very young. Maybe four or five.

Father, please bring to light anything that needs to be brought to light and calm any fears from this. Please help me discern the real from the unreal in Jesus Name and bind any work of the enemy. I pray peace of mind. In Jesus Name.

Father I stand with Mayflower in this prayer. I ask You to give her an experience of Yourself, Your Presence, Your peace and the truth. Hold her securely and comfort her as You reveal everything You wish her to see. Show her where You were when these memories were created, and empower her to believe that You can, and will provide answers and healing. Amen.

 

[TLHKAJ]

Thanks jostler. I'm numb feeling so think I'm going to just get some sleep.

Praying for you ....rest well...the Lord has you.

 

[Jostler]

Mayflower,

Thanks jostler. I'm numb feeling so think I'm going to just get some sleep.

Rest Rest is good. He reveals this stuff in His way, when the time is right. He knows when we are ready.

May you Rest deeply and peacefully tonight, in Him.

 

[Shattered]

I understand the surreal effect these memories have upon us, @Mayflower . As the presenter, we have been consciously shielded and in a way, spared from the trauma which fragments (alternate personalities) have suffered. This is partially by design (programming) and also due to the activity of protector fragments whose sole purpose is to keep the presenter safe and relatively clueless.

I view DID much like a shattered pane of glass. The dissociative defense isolates a fragment behind a "wall of amnesia" thus creating a distinct personality in space and time. Many fragments are effectively "frozen" in space and time by virtue of this barrier.

We are whole, then we are shattered (dissociative response to trauma) just like a pane of glass. The presenter is intended to make it possible for us to function on this earth and so in most respects we are "normative;" however, this is just a generalization. Each of us is different.