NOTE: No there's no point in trying to talk to her, because she doesn't realize what she's doing; if I try addressing to her what she is doing, she doesn't think she's doing anything wrong, and I know as wrong as she doesn't think she's doing anything wrong she's not going to change.
Unfortunately, the difficult relationship is with my mom. I grew up in a dysfunctional family. There wasn't any substance abuse, sexual abuse, domestic violence, no absentee parenting and I my parents weren't divorced. However, from a communication and emotional standpoint, it was completely dysfunctional; I know a large reason why she acts the way she does is she grew up in a dysfunctional family, and unless the cycle of dysfunction is broken, dysfunctional families are generational.
Below are the ways she acts (this is only in regards to me, from a parent-to-child point of reference).
She is a perfectionist, which means:
She is extremely critical
All-or-nothing (black-and-white) thinking
unrealistic and unreasonable expectations
extremely defensive
As stated previously, she grew up in a dysfunctional family. She never learned healthy ways of dealing with stress and conflict and how to handle difficult emotions; she pretty much was taught (via exposure from her parents) the worst possible ways of dealing with both of these things. On top of this she absolutely hates conflict
Unfortunately, the difficult relationship is with my mom. I grew up in a dysfunctional family. There wasn't any substance abuse, sexual abuse, domestic violence, no absentee parenting and I my parents weren't divorced. However, from a communication and emotional standpoint, it was completely dysfunctional; I know a large reason why she acts the way she does is she grew up in a dysfunctional family, and unless the cycle of dysfunction is broken, dysfunctional families are generational.
Below are the ways she acts (this is only in regards to me, from a parent-to-child point of reference).
She is a perfectionist, which means:
She is extremely critical
All-or-nothing (black-and-white) thinking
unrealistic and unreasonable expectations
extremely defensive
As stated previously, she grew up in a dysfunctional family. She never learned healthy ways of dealing with stress and conflict and how to handle difficult emotions; she pretty much was taught (via exposure from her parents) the worst possible ways of dealing with both of these things. On top of this she absolutely hates conflict