Does the "husband of one wife" requirement mean that polygamy was common in the early church?

[MatthewG]

Samuel is not exactly a story that is going to be useful. Eli was a horrible priest. So let's divert away and use Judah and Tamar.

Judah was supposed to give Tamar to another husband of one of his sons...
And if not he was supposed to marry her himself to keep the lineage going for his dead son.

But he didn't want to marry her either even though he was personally responsible for her being married to someone. And the moment she came up pregnant he was more than ready to execute her for being a prostitute....

But then she proved it was actually his child that she got out of him by being deceitful. "She is more righteous than I" was what Judah said. Judah was willing to waste his seed on a prostitute but unwilling to give her a child. (He had issues)

A young wife? What's not to like? Something was definitely wrong with these people.

A brother was supposed to marry a deceased brother's wife to continue his lineage for him. Also to provide economic support (life insurance policy) to her if he died. Others simply because of wealth married a second or third woman because they could...and Legacy was a huge prize of pride in the Ancient Near East. The more children and the more wealth they generated the larger the legacy.

One day you and I both will leave Earth bound for Heaven. What legacy will we leave behind? One of substance or one of sin and self service? There are many notable people in history that have left us legacies of their actions. Edison, Einstein, Benjamin Franklin, George Washington, and even Henry the 8th.

Polygamist want a legacy through one or more of their children. Through Jacob we have the Nation Israel. (Big legacy)

As far as hardships?
Every life has hardships...even the wealthy elite have hardships. Life is not easy for anyone, anywhere, at anytime throughout history.

Im just asking is it really loving to have sex with one wife, and have sex with the other. That is the overall question. Does God approve of this? or did God make a template in the Garden, one man and one wife. That is all I am looking to be found in being answered @JohnDB. Man can say a lot with words.

 

[MatthewG]

There are people out there who think it is okay to have sex with children. That is not right, ... there are many people falling into the line because of the people in the old testament doing polygamy that it is okay for them to do today. In the end I believe it hurts people, and really makes a messed up relationship with Yahava, if you ask me personally, @JohnDB. Maybe you don't feel or see the same way, or even steven for that matter cause he never answers me anymore.

1 Corinthians 7:33 But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife—

Not to say people can't have a wife, however the mind focuses on the world rather than the heavenly, especially if you got more than one wife.... you gotta worry about how you will please her.

 

[JohnDB]

Im just asking is it really loving to have sex with one wife, and have sex with the other. That is the overall question. Does God approve of this? or did God make a template in the Garden, one man and one wife.

Sex is a major physical part of marriage. Sex causes children. Just one of those things. In today's society we are definitely over-sexed. Everything is about sex in some fashion. Whether abstaining or endulging or browbeating the abstainers or endulgers. *depending upon your proclivities*

Where there is a physical imperative to engage in sex much like a physical imperative to eat and drink food it should not be the sum focus of life as society would have you believe it to be.
That doesn't mean that it should be completely absent either. It's just a part of normal life. Not that big a deal...much like supper last night was or breakfast this morning will be.

But how I treat others with breakfast or dinner? That's more of the object of the exercise than anything else. I don't share Breakfast with just anyone....nor do I try and tease everyone with a great dinner.

Kinda boring at the end of the day IMHO. But kindness, gentleness, respect, and etc....these things are in short supply and special.

 

[MatthewG]

Sex is a major physical part of marriage. Sex causes children. Just one of those things. In today's society we are definitely over-sexed. Everything is about sex in some fashion. Whether abstaining or endulging or browbeating the abstainers or endulgers. *depending upon your proclivities*

Where there is a physical imperative to engage in sex much like a physical imperative to eat and drink food it should not be the sum focus of life as society would have you believe it to be.
That doesn't mean that it should be completely absent either. It's just a part of normal life. Not that big a deal...much like supper last night was or breakfast this morning will be.

But how I treat others with breakfast or dinner? That's more of the object of the exercise than anything else. I don't share Breakfast with just anyone....nor do I try and tease everyone with a great dinner.

Kinda boring at the end of the day IMHO. But kindness, gentleness, respect, and etc....these things are in short supply and special.

Sex is a great and wonderful thing that God created. When two people have sex they become one flesh and become married, to that one person. Not many people realize this, they believe they need to go to church and have a priest ordained it. I wish I knew that when I was younger... I probably would have saved myself for marriage properly, unfortunately I have had many wives. Oh well, was my own choice. That was before I met God, and I was mean as all hell to those women to some degree or another.

 

[JohnDB]

There are people out there who think it is okay to have sex with children. That is not right, ... there are many people falling into the line because of the people in the old testament doing polygamy that it is okay for them to do today. In the end I believe it hurts people, and really makes a messed up relationship with Yahava, if you ask me personally, @JohnDB. Maybe you don't feel or see the same way, or even steven for that matter cause he never answers me anymore.

1 Corinthians 7:33 But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife—

Not to say people can't have a wife, however the mind focuses on the world rather than the heavenly, especially if you got more than one wife.... you gotta worry about how you will please her.

People are selfish....they want to use the innocent for their personal gratification. They are sick twisted perverts who destroy everything they touch. I highly recommend staying away from these sorts and not having anything to do with them.

I do find it especially interesting though....
Jeffrey Epstein had an Island that had all kinds of Children for sex exploitation....the children have been rescued, Jeffrey is dead. The patrons? They seem to be missing from any list anywhere. Just saying....

 

[MatthewG]

IF anyone tells you it is okay to go ahead and have another wife, or talk their husband into have another man in a marriage, be weary! Be cautious! My advice, is get away from that type of thinking. Sexual choices, really effect the whole of the body according to Paul.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20

New Living Translation

​

18 Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. 19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, 20 for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.

 

[MatthewG]

People are selfish....they want to use the innocent for their personal gratification. They are sick twisted perverts who destroy everything they touch. I highly recommend staying away from these sorts and not having anything to do with them.

I do find it especially interesting though....
Jeffrey Epstein had an Island that had all kinds of Children for sex exploitation....the children have been rescued, Jeffrey is dead. The patrons? They seem to be missing from any list anywhere. Just saying....

It seems Yahava, has a dedicated group of people who buckle down and try to get people help who do these things, praise be to Him! There are those out there who do turn their lives around, amen. Even if the help is found in Jail, or perhaps in the afterlife even.

 

[Deborah_]

By the same token, do you believe a leader must be married? No single leaders?

I know this is an issue for young men who are following a call to ministry. They have to get married first.
Not always the best situation.

This is a more difficult question to answer; I don't think one can be as definite as "must" or "must not". Paul also states that a leader's children must be obedient and godly (Titus 1:6) - so does that exclude men who are married but childless? And as far as we know, Paul himself had neither wife nor children! (see I Corinthians 9:5)

It's worth remembering that in the first century most people were married by the time they were twenty. There would have been very few never-married adult men. And since leadership implies a certain degree of maturity, should we be ordaining "young" men anyway?

 

[MatthewG]

Here is some more information concerning polygamy for those interested in a collection of verses.

 

[JohnDB]

And since leadership implies a certain degree of maturity, should we be ordaining "young" men anyway?

I don't know if it's about maturity as much as it implies wisdom.
Knowing wisdom and learning wisdom are somewhat different.

Some people Excell at applied knowledge (which is wisdom) others just regurgitate what they have learned by listening to others. And it is deceiving at times who is who. And I've learned that over the years some old guys are not as wise or uncorrupt as they would like for us to believe.

 

[St. SteVen]

Paul also states that a leader's children must be obedient and godly (Titus 1:6) - so does that exclude men who are married but childless? And as far as we know, Paul himself had neither wife nor children! (see I Corinthians 9:5)

Wow. Another great point, thanks.

/

 

[St. SteVen]

New topic. (shameless promotion)

The challenge in Christianity is not to love Jesus, it's to love Judas.

/

 

[1stCenturyLady]

I'm glad you brought up Matthew chapter 19.
It contains a perfect example of what I am saying about
how we imprint our western values on the Bible.

What does the church say is the ONLY grounds for divorce? Adultery, right?
Compare Matthew 19:9 in both the NIV with the KJV below. Notice anything different? (fornication)

Jesus said "except it be for fornication, not adultery. (as the church claims)
The NIV gets this wrong, the KJV gets this right. Check the NT Greek.

Adultery is sex with another person while you or the other or both are married to other people. In this verse fornication would be a married person having sex even with another of the same sex or animal. It is a wider range. That is why I think the use of the word "adultery" is clearer to the point.

 

[amigo de christo]

I think Jesus put it back to the original, so no, the early church did not do polygamy. Also, two Christians could not divorce one another. 1 Cor. 7 (This is why my ex-husband was the last man I ever kissed in 2001. I am now the founding member of The Eunuch's Club!

Mt. 19
4 And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

7 They said to Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?”

8 He said to them, “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”

Correct dear friend . You see JESUS did come to set us straight again .
NOW the jews and others did have more than one wife . and we cannot just put away a wife for any reason .
HOWEVER the correction was coming .
See at that time there probably were men with more than one wife . JEWS had , not all but some , more than one wife .
ITS NOT LIKE that jew that came to JESUS was gonna put away his other wives at that time .
HOWEVER FOR LEADERSHIP PURPOSES one man one wife . And most folks think me crazy too sister .
BUT I too have been abistinate for twenty years now . MY ex wife i put away for all the wrong reasons
AND I cannot remarry . SO singel i remain as JESUS SAID TO DO SO . Folks think we are legalistic
BUT WE ARE NOT sister . JESUS TAUGHT IT , WE SIMPLY HEED what HE SAID .
MY wife still lives , SO I AM SINGLE . PEROID .
Now before folks on the site think i am so depressed and find this so difficult .
ALLOW me to remind them of something .
WHEN I used to work in the public at a store , many times folks and even christains would always ask me
why i was so happy and had such peace . WELL HAPPY IS HE OR SHE WHO KEEPTH MY SAYINGS .
Only when they found out WHY i was singel many of them started accusing me falsely
and said NO WAY they could do that . NO way they could be happy being single if they could not remarry .
YET THEY WERE THE ONES WHO HAD ASKED ME WHY I WAS SO HAPPY . YEAH LET THAT SINK IT A BIT .
PS
I am also witness to another sister who often visits this site .
Years back she got unequally yoked in a marriage of adultery .
DO FEEL free to ask her IF SHE GONNA DO THAT AGAIN . This sister dont smoke
but i can tell ya if folks on the site were to come and tell her to do that again
SMOKE WOULD BE IN HER CHAIR . DUE TO SHE FLED SO FAST THE FRICTION LIT IT UP ON FIRE .
THAT SISTER AINT GONNA BE DOING THAT AGAIN . GOD HAD tremendous mercy upon her
and HE fixed the situation . SHE WONT be doing that again . SHE would tell you so herself .

 

[1stCenturyLady]

Correct dear friend . You see JESUS did come to set us straight again .
NOW the jews and others did have more than one wife . and we cannot just put away a wife for any reason .
HOWEVER the correction was coming .
See at that time there probably were men with more than one wife . JEWS had , not all but some , more than one wife .
ITS NOT LIKE that jew that came to JESUS was gonna put away his other wives at that time .
HOWEVER FOR LEADERSHIP PURPOSES one man one wife . And most folks think me crazy too sister .
BUT I too have been abistinate for twenty years now . MY ex wife i put away for all the wrong reasons
AND I cannot remarry . SO singel i remain as JESUS SAID TO DO SO . Folks think we are legalistic
BUT WE ARE NOT sister . JESUS TAUGHT IT , WE SIMPLY HEED what HE SAID .
MY wife still lives , SO I AM SINGLE . PEROID .
Now before folks on the site think i am so depressed and find this so difficult .
ALLOW me to remind them of something .
WHEN I used to work in the public at a store , many times folks and even christains would always ask me
why i was so happy and had such peace . WELL HAPPY IS HE OR SHE WHO KEEPTH MY SAYINGS .
Only when they found out WHY i was singel many of them started accusing me falsely
and said NO WAY they could do that . NO way they could be happy being single if they could not remarry .
YET THEY WERE THE ONES WHO HAD ASKED ME WHY I WAS SO HAPPY . YEAH LET THAT SINK IT A BIT .

I hear you and agree!

 

[St. SteVen]

Adultery is sex with another person while you or the other or both are married to other people. In this verse fornication would be a married person having sex even with another of the same sex or animal. It is a wider range. That is why I think the use of the word "adultery" is clearer to the point.

Not what this is about. IMO
They were discussing the law of Moses and the certificate of divorce.

Matthew 19:7 NIV
“Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”

/

 

[1stCenturyLady]

Not what this is about. IMO
They were discussing the law of Moses and the certificate of divorce.

Matthew 19:7 NIV
“Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”

/

I understand that, and know fornication was not what Jesus was referring to, but marriage and divorce like you said. I was responding to a post regarding the poster saying that the original was using the word "fornication."

 

[St. SteVen]

I understand that, and know fornication was not what Jesus was referring to, but marriage and divorce like you said. I was responding to a post regarding the poster saying that the original was using the word "fornication."

That was me. The KJV follows the Greek, some others do not.
And this points to the law that a man could reject his new bride based on the claim that she was not a virgin.
Basically a charge of "bad merchandise" which the owner parents could challenge by "displaying the cloth".

Deuteronomy 22:13-18 NIV
If a man takes a wife and, after sleeping with her, dislikes her
14 and slanders her and gives her a bad name, saying,
“I married this woman, but when I approached her,
I did not find proof of her virginity,”
15 then the young woman’s father and mother shall bring
to the town elders at the gate proof that she was a virgin.
16 Her father will say to the elders,
“I gave my daughter in marriage to this man, but he dislikes her.
17 Now he has slandered her and said,
‘I did not find your daughter to be a virgin.’
But here is the proof of my daughter’s virginity.”
Then her parents shall display the cloth before the elders of the town,
18 and the elders shall take the man and punish him.

/

 

[Ritajanice]

Adultery is sex with another person while you or the other or both are married to other people. In this verse fornication would be a married person having sex even with another of the same sex or animal. It is a wider range. That is why I think the use of the word "adultery" is clearer to the point.

Is it still classed as adultery...if man / woman lusts after each other in the mind?

 

[Behold]

Why does the Apostle Paul require that
church Elders be the "husband of one wife" if
polygamy wasn't common in the church?

Jews are under the Old Covenant, in Paul's Day.

= one wife at a time.

What your verse means, if that if a person is to be considered for the office of a ELDER... the Head of the Church, then they must not have had a DIVORCE.

"husband of one wife', = They are married one time, to the same woman... no divorce in their past.