is something wrong with me? *cw, substance abuse*

[ThePuffyBlob]

i dont feel guilty . but i know it is wrong. i feel like i would do it again

i also did the same if i am not wrong with what i understand it is about addiction right? if it is indeed addiction i did the same but in a different way and nothing else works i asked for a lot of help but after all that nothing has been working in the end the answer is in me the answer is in you if you want to die go ahead do the things that you want even if you know it is wrong but if you want to live then repent and change your ways "endure until the end and you will live"

 

[2nd Timothy Group]

I used one of my prescriptions the other day. I wasn't trying to self-harm. I was just trying to cope so I won't get down.
I don't feel guilty. but I know it is wrong. I feel like I would do it again if I feel low enough. I just know I would confess about other things but otherwise, I just don't know.

I wouldn't worry so much about any form of chemical abuse as I would about why you don't feel that you have control over your feelings. The last thing you need right now is to feel bad about any idea of addiction or abuse. More than this, we cannot allow ourselves to become overly concerned about what others think of us . . . they have their own issues to deal with.

Believe in yourself . . . I certainly do!

 

[DuckieLady]

i used one of my prescriptions the other day. i wasnt trying to self harm. i was just trying to cope so i wont get down.
i dont feel guilty . but i know it is wrong. i feel like i would do it again if i feel low enough. i just know i would confess about other things but otherwise i jsut dont know.

I don't see any getting "high" effects contributed to triptan, but it does increase serotonin levels. Anyway, what it seems like to me considering you said you would do it again but basically wanted to confess, is that it's less about that and more that you just need someone to talk to.

I would get in touch with either anyone on here that you trust to just rant and get things off of your chest. I would also get in touch with a support group. Sometimes you need that and you need people that get it-get it. I haven't used it in years, but My PTSD was a big help for me back in the day. You need people around that relate to you.

I would talk to your doctor about Ashwagandha, which is an herb as effective as Paxil, without the negative side effects or withdrawal symptoms when you quit. I took 6,000 mg a day and it helped severely with stress and social anxiety. It was the only way I could feel normal. Here some stuff about that from Examine. Scroll down to where the blue table is and you can see the consistency of benefits according to scientific research. Self-care is important, too.

tl;dr
Recommendations:
1. Get in touch with someone or a support group like My PTSD
2. Talk to doctor about Ashwaghanda and maybe work on a self-care plan to make sure you're taking care of yourself


If you want to start picking yourself up when life is being a big fat gross booger and pushing you down, sometimes you need a plan and when you're hit hard, you don't know where to start. Those two are good places to start.

 

[Nancy]

is there anybody in the US who doesn't use medications?

Probably not many.

 

[lilygrace]

Ahh tough love lol

Maybe this is leading me to repentance. I don't always get emotional about my changes like I've seen others do.

i also did the same if i am not wrong with what i understand it is about addiction right? if it is indeed addiction i did the same but in a different way and nothing else works i asked for a lot of help but after all that nothing has been working in the end the answer is in me the answer is in you if you want to die go ahead do the things that you want even if you know it is wrong but if you want to live then repent and change your ways "endure until the end and you will live"

 

[lilygrace]

The serotonin thing might make sense. So it wasn't really a high then just a serotonin boost. The heart stuff scares me so I guess the logic of that helps .

 

[lilygrace]

Thank you all for responding. I realize i didn't make sense at first

 

[DuckieLady]

The serotonin thing might make sense. So it wasn't really a high then just a serotonin boost. The heart stuff scares me so I guess the logic of that helps .

Yes, and that's part of why I recommended ashwagandha. It is an adaptogen and will give you that boost of serotonin and GABA. It takes 2-3 weeks for your body to adapt to it but it's well worth the wait if you can keep up on it.

Depending on your diet, a women's one a day might even be worth looking into. It sounds like your brain needs some attention. Hobbies are necessary. There's a reason people in survival situations will make tea from herbs or trees around them, keep a watch on to track the time (for their sanity), or find anything to do that makes them feel like they're more in control of their environment. You need things to help boost morale.

The brain needs a way to cope. And you don't want to wait so long that it gets worse and you end up like I did- thinking the TV is having a conversation with you or the lightbulbs burning out is a sign.

 

[lilygrace]

Yes, and that's part of why I recommended ashwagandha. It is an adaptogen and will give you that boost of serotonin and GABA. It takes 2-3 weeks for your body to adapt to it but it's well worth the wait if you can keep up on it.

Depending on your diet, a women's one a day might even be worth looking into. It sounds like your brain needs some attention. Hobbies are necessary. There's a reason people in survival situations will make tea from herbs or trees around them, keep a watch on to track the time (for their sanity), or find anything to do that makes them feel like they're more in control of their environment. You need things to help boost morale.

The brain needs a way to cope. And you don't want to wait so long that it gets worse and you end up like I did- thinking the TV is having a conversation with you or the lightbulbs burning out is a sign.

thank you it makes sense <3

 

[DuckieLady]

thank you it makes sense <3

You're welcome. You'll get there. Just make sure that if you do get outside support, you get connected with people strong enough to pull you up a little bit, and not people that will put you back under the water and want to stay there. That's a dangerous place to be, but reliable people that won't get overwhelmed and abandon when you need it most.

You want to cling onto the roots, or sit on the sturdy branches, but avoid the shady twigs. Shady twigs will break and take you with them. And avoid the flighty leaves at all costs. They look nice but they'll be everywhere once the wind blows.

 

[JesusLovesYou]

Well, actually, medications do help people cope. But they're not the answer to the problem. They only maybe buy time until the person is stable or strong enough to address the root issues. And while they may help a person cope, they may also eventually cause other issues that prevent ability to get at the root of what is causing a person's depression or anxieties. So there is a fine line ...medications can help, or they may hinder.

@JesusLovesYou @lilygrace
Ideally, talking to someone who is trustworthy and has a relationship with Christ is helpful. But there can be many roadblocks to that as well. Finding someone who has His heart toward the broken is challenging (even in the churches) ....let alone having finances to pay someone.

I feel strongly that if someone is called by God to minister to the broken, they shouldn't charge a fee. If someone wants to give an offering or gift, that is different. But to ask for or require a "gift" or a set fee...I feel, is very wrong. I would look for lay counseling within a church, or just pray for God to lead you to the right person you can talk to and who will support you with prayer.

Over the last 10+yrs, the Lord has given me opportunities for peer-to-peer counseling (giving and receiving) and has also given me opportunities to reach out to others who have been where I once was, and offer love, counsel, support, prayer, and friendship.

I totally agree with the points above.

1. My wife has been taking medications for depression for a long time now, and she has gotten used to the euphoric state she is in that she does not realize there are other issues which came about due to the long time that she has been on the medication. First of all, the issues that she was treating with the medication resurfaced. Second, she relies so much on the medications that she pushes me away constantly and finds refuge in friends who make her feel good in the state that she is in rather than take advice from the people who love her.

2. Finding someone who has the heart of Christ is hard, but that does not mean you should stop looking. Here is an idea. Ask someone for a biblical advice to any particular problem you have, and ask them what is the passage that they base their answer on. Then go home and really look into that passage—to whom it was written, in what context, look at the promises in that passage or maybe the warnings, and analyze it like you used to analyze sentences in fifth grade (subject, verb, tense, etc.). As I said, it might be the hardest thing finding someone, but when you do, you will thank God for this first miracle. The rest will follow from here. And as much as I agree with free Christian counseling, if you really cannot find someone to talk to otherwise, one or two sessions with a counselor could be all you need. You might even find insurance or some other form of help for the counseling. If you know that what you have tried until now does not work, it’s time to try something new, and you should not feel guilty about it. May God help you.

 

[TLHKAJ]

Anytime I went to a licensed counselor, it turned out bad...sometimes, horribly bad. The problem a lot of times is that even if they are a Christian, they have belief systems and practices that are not Biblical or safe (such as guided imagery and hypnotism). And they are obligated by certain laws which may put a person in danger, depending on what their issues are.
Then for me, I was not able to afford $75/hr ...one 1-hr (or more like 45 minute) session a week wasn't going to suffice in my situation. By 45 minutes, you have just enough time to get into some very raw emotions and then....time's up, where's my money? (lol) Not helpful at all and very cold and clinical. You leave feeling like you had major surgery and now have this huge gaping wound that didn't get closed up properly.

 

[quietthinker]

I totally agree with the points above.

1. My wife has been taking medications for depression for a long time now, and she has gotten used to the euphoric state she is in that she does not realize there are other issues which came about due to the long time that she has been on the medication. First of all, the issues that she was treating with the medication resurfaced. Second, she relies so much on the medications that she pushes me away constantly and finds refuge in friends who make her feel good in the state that she is in rather than take advice from the people who love her.

2. Finding someone who has the heart of Christ is hard, but that does not mean you should stop looking. Here is an idea. Ask someone for a biblical advice to any particular problem you have, and ask them what is the passage that they base their answer on. Then go home and really look into that passage—to whom it was written, in what context, look at the promises in that passage or maybe the warnings, and analyze it like you used to analyze sentences in fifth grade (subject, verb, tense, etc.). As I said, it might be the hardest thing finding someone, but when you do, you will thank God for this first miracle. The rest will follow from here. And as much as I agree with free Christian counseling, if you really cannot find someone to talk to otherwise, one or two sessions with a counselor could be all you need. You might even find insurance or some other form of help for the counseling. If you know that what you have tried until now does not work, it’s time to try something new, and you should not feel guilty about it. May God help you.

for what it's worth...the root cause of depression/anxiety is guilt....guilt whether it is real, imagined, superimposed or subconscious.... medications mask.... they deal with the issue of 'feel good'......they replace ones reality with a false reality.....they don't deal with the issue of release and forgiveness from sin and self condemnation. There is only one real solution to depression/anxiety ...'cast your burdens on him for he cares for you'

 

[TLHKAJ]

for what it's worth...the root cause of depression/anxiety is guilt....guilt whether it is real, imagined, superimposed or subconscious.... medications mask.... they deal with the issue of 'feel good'......they replace ones reality with a false reality.....they don't deal with the issue of release and forgiveness from sin and self condemnation. There is only one real solution to depression/anxiety ...'cast your burdens on him for he cares for you'

Depression can also be suppression of anger ...anger that turns inward, self hate, etc., or even a result of helplessness.

 

[DuckieLady]

Depression can also be suppression of anger ...anger that turns inward, self hate, etc., or even a result of helplessness.

Here is an interesting one I learned recently from watching a Human Behavioral Biology lecture from Robert Sapolsky ... (This isn't what I'm studying. I just do it for fun. ... I can't code people. )

There are four things that all have one thing in common.

1. A woman's menstrual cycle
2. Testosterone injections
3. Junk food
4. A brain tumor

Guess what the thing is ... They all cause anger and they all have been successfully reasons to acquit people in a murder trial. (Nobody try this.)

There are lots of REAL internal reasons that lead to depression or other emotions, like the reasons you mentioned. There are also a lot of interesting external biological reasons. Women of age experience this 1-2 weeks out of the month. Men and women both can have hormonal changes that lead to anger and depression. Same with environmental effects.

We're a very interesting species, and I take a lot of interest in this stuff, but I'll never agree that we're merely animals, because from a Christian standpoint, we are all really spiritual beings and we are able to overcome the flesh by the spirit. That doesn't mean that we don't go through normal human behavior and emotions.

 

[quietthinker]

Depression can also be suppression of anger ...anger that turns inward, self hate, etc., or even a result of helplessness.

Guilt generates sickness..... however it is called. It distorts the view of oneself, of others and of God.

 

[Tone]

for what it's worth...the root cause of depression/anxiety is guilt....guilt whether it is real, imagined, superimposed or subconscious.... medications mask.... they deal with the issue of 'feel good'......they replace ones reality with a false reality.....they don't deal with the issue of release and forgiveness from sin and self condemnation. There is only one real solution to depression/anxiety ...'cast your burdens on him for he cares for you'

Guilt generates sickness..... however it is called. It distorts the view of oneself, of others and of God.

Yeah, sometimes...instead of just fighting and fighting...according to their rules and prescriptions...


...you just gotta 3:33 it:

 

[JesusLovesYou]

for what it's worth...the root cause of depression/anxiety is guilt....guilt whether it is real, imagined, superimposed or subconscious.... medications mask.... they deal with the issue of 'feel good'......they replace ones reality with a false reality.....they don't deal with the issue of release and forgiveness from sin and self condemnation. There is only one real solution to depression/anxiety ...'cast your burdens on him for he cares for you'

Amen

 

[JesusLovesYou]

for what it's worth...the root cause of depression/anxiety is guilt....guilt whether it is real, imagined, superimposed or subconscious.... medications mask.... they deal with the issue of 'feel good'......they replace ones reality with a false reality.....they don't deal with the issue of release and forgiveness from sin and self condemnation. There is only one real solution to depression/anxiety ...'cast your burdens on him for he cares for you'

So how would you convince someone to stop taking the medications and start dealing with life? Just telling them is not enough. What can one do beyond words to help someone in this situation?

 

[Tone]

So how would you convince someone to stop taking the medications and start dealing with life? Just telling them is not enough. What can one do beyond words to help someone in this situation?

I don't know how @quietthinker will respond to this, but I would say first and foremost would be prayer...an earnest turning to the Father for His Holy Breath to empower the one dependent on the perspective of others (doctors, psychiatrists, etc...), to have His Mind, in Yahushua ha Mashiach.

Also, I would present some more holistic and healthier alternatives such as, What is Music Therapy | What is Music Therapy? | American Music Therapy Association (AMTA), for instance.

Good question btw!

*MT Mental Health 2006.indd (musictherapy.org)