To repent is a matter of rejocing. The words "repent" and "comfort" are the same word in Hebrew. If we genuninely repent, the initial sorrow at the evil of our past is replaced by rejoicing since we know the error of our ways and know we won't repeat that error.
He repeatd his sin. He fooled his wife and he fooled his congregation; and for all I know maybe he lied to God. It's nothing to me. He didn't harm me. There is nothing for me to forgive. I believe someone when he says he sorry the first time. I am not God to be able to read his mind, so I prefer to err on the side of mercy and not on the sdie of strict justice. If that person repeats his mistake, I don't tell him I forgive him It doesn't matter to me. I stop trying to help him improve. If he wants my forgiveness the second time, he needs to prove he's sorry by doing penance of some sort. "Fool me once, shame on you: Fool me twice, shame on me."
I remember that speech. I remember his wife's face too. She looked like a saint to me. From her face, I could tell she loved him and wanted only the best for him. When he did it again, I thought of how he had betrayed her love and trust again -- after knowing how he had hurt her the first time. Why would I trust someone who can do that to a loving wife? Why would I think he'd treat me any better?
Too many Christians have a flawed definition of what repentance is. They think they could steal a car, go ask God for forgiveness and then keep the car. They were forgiven, right? Why should they have to return the car? They want to believe God loves them and that they love God when they prove they don't love their fellow man. They may be fooling themselves; but surely no one else needs to be fooled. By their fruits, you will know them. Anyone can make mistakes, I realize; but there is no excuse for repeating them after the error of our ways is shown to us. That is deliberate willful sin. Jesus did sacrifice himself so we could keep sinning and sinning after knowing better. Sinning becomes grievous indeed after we know better -- after we can see the misery and pain we have caused others.
Stupid me -- I believe Swaggart and his wife had worked things out when I saw her peaceful face. She found some "comfort" in the idea that he was truly sorry. She was right -- because true repentance is comforting. But he betrayed her. He returned evil to her for the good she gave to him. That is the definintion of iniquity to me. I understand returning good for good and evil for evil. I understand returning good for evil. I do not understand returning evil for good; and Christians need to learn how to spot the swine so they stop throwing their pearls at them. There have been a few people I genuinely cared about -- but when they returned evil to me for the good I did them, I realized I was making them worse. They saw the goodness in others as a weakness they could exploit. I continued to love them, but I never let it show. I was cold as ice with them outwardly although I felt as if I was crying inside. I would not allow them to think they could continue to exploit my good side.
