Looking For The Path I Used To Walk.

[Massiah]

Hi! (To whoever is out there)

A little background to me; I found the Lord about 8 years ago, He broke my crooked ways and then re-aligned my life and cast my spirit with his love! I was on fire for Jesus, then i had to leave the place i felt God's presence and go back home... I tried to keep the fire in my heart, (none of my family or friends are Christians, and the churchs where i live are dead to the spirit) i was like a solitary candle in the wilderness, a lump of coal fallen from the hearth, the fire dimmed and eventually went cold. I tried to plant seeds into the hearts of those who were interested, answered questions, handed out WWJD / FROG / PUSH wrist bands to everyone that wanted one (this was quite a successful venture, at one stage when the fire still burned within me we were out in a club and i noticed that probably about 30% of the people in the club were wearing Jesus bands ^_^ It was a small victory! People still come up to me and ask if i have any band to give them to this day!). I tried to live my life a beacon of light so that others could follow the path.

But eventually i was empty, i had given everything i had, and i lost the way to refill myself! I slipped away from Jesus' love, i dated a non-Christian, my life started to change, I started to change (although i didn't know it!). 5 year down the line and i looked at my life, i still thought of myself as a Christian but i was a poor excuse for one... then about 2 months ago i went back to where i was saved and ive been renewed once again! Hallelujah! I realised i couldn't be the person i had become and couldn't live the life i was living. I broke up with my girlfriend of 5 years, it was not an easy choice but it was the right choice.

My issue is, i feel like the devil has dragged me so far from where i used to be with Jesus... Only once have i felt something akin to God telling me He loves me for who i am, it brought me to tears. But it feels like the Devil is whispering in my ear taking this moment away from me (i.e. it was all in my head, He didn't speak to me).

How do i get back to where i used to be? The devil has stolen my youthful years from Jesus - and i want them back!
Am i hearing but not listening, am i looking but not seeing? Can you guys share some of your testimonies with me - I only have one and its fading in my mind.

There has been many things happen in my life that i thank God for and believe that without Him i would not be who i am today, but only once has He spoken to me - i was at church - and we were worshipping singing this song...
"He is Good, He is Good and his Love endures.
He is Good, He is Good and his Love endures."

This is what i heard, i can't even describe how i heard it;
"I love you, I love you, I love you"
Simple... but powerful enough to bring me to my knees in tears (my eyes just glistened over just typing it).

Please share your faith with me.

 

[Samuel Pickens]

Jesus Christ is Lord. Jehovah Tsidkenu = Jesus our righteousness.

Back to basics. you've recognized; that's a step. Forsake not the assembling of yourselves together and more as you see the day approaching.
Get into a 'local' church as setup by the apostles and join yourself to that church. Have you been baptized? I was saved on Jan 5, 1972 and soon after we broke the ice in the river and I was baptized. This is a good thing to do. Your church fellowship and your stewardship will take care of things. You'll find your Christian family will help you and Christ will be there and just follow the scribed path.

We all have problems. Paul had problems, Peter had problems.......... but if we follow Christ and pitch our camp with Christians we'll be in good company and the burden will be lighter.

 

[gregg]

UBERGEEK-been their-done that -regret it.i
The hardest part is to forgive yourself for being so stupid.But god reminded me to walk in love not just towards my neighbors but also towards
myself.this was hard to do but it worked.So press forward as though it never happened. remember love and forgiveness are one.never bring up your pass only talk about your future.forgive yourself love yourself gods got a calling for you.we are his children and we know his voice. don't let guilt live within god forgave us.

 

[Miss Hepburn]

Hi!
i was empty,

My issue is, i feel like the devil has dragged me so far from where i used to be with Jesus...How do i get back to where i used to be? The devil has stolen my youthful years from Jesus - and i want them back!

Please share your faith with me.

Hi and welcome uber!
Those points above were the main things I noticed - kept them to remind me what we're talking about!

Life is so simple and sometimes we complicate things. Like we have these paper chains on screaming for help.
Or, I like this one ....we're standing in ankle deep water and crying for help! (I have a friend this way - LOL!)
Got another!! ---We're fish saying we're thirsty while surrounded by water.

That darned devil - you got that right - he has the trickiest of tricks to make us think God isn't all around us loving us ---
He's got the spicket running all the time and we take our cup away! LOL LOL LOL!

Laugh at the devil, stop thinking about and focusing on where you used to be, soldier -relax and open yourself to God - don't beg or plead or lament.... just peacefully - Be Still like He said to. If a whirlwind of regret and looking in the rearview mirror is going on - how the heck are you going to get reconnected!!

It really is that simple. He's a prayer away. That's in a song -It's that simple.

Focus on the emptiness you get more emptiness -focus on the high stuff and you get the high stuff.

Love you,
XXOO Miss Hepburn

Here: Here's a good thing to repeat to yourself, one of a 100 things to help calm you and focus that busy mind of yours ---This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of him.

Ask for peace and to feel your connection inside to Him -don't beg - just ask and know it's comin'.

 

[HammerStone]

Ubergeek, it's funny how certain themes - for lack of a better word - come up at certain times.

I think we all deal with a sort of ebb and flow - our faith tide that comes in so vigorously at times only to slip back out in the night. I've experienced what you're talking about on a smaller scale, but certainly to a similar degree be it through different experiences. About a month and a half ago I had a series of things fall apart in my life (and the life with my fiancee). Relationship-wise, we remain better than ever. Those things that we experience together in life just began to fold and fall. I'm looking around as this happens thinking to myself "Lord, I've done a pretty good job, why does this weird bad stuff continue to happen to me?" Some of the things that happened were 100% my fault, others the result of some bad luck, and still others the result of things well out of my hands. Now I've certainly been blessed not to have much happen physically, but mentally and spiritually things began to weigh.

It came to a head one weekend. Going to church that morning the song "Jesus Bring the Rain" played on the radio. At that moment it was one of surrender because it hit. There was a wall and I'm sprawled out against it like a fly on a windshield. Splat. I get on into church and the lesson is about exactly that. It's the moment where God stops you because you've allowed these little things to creep in and take over. Maybe you've "taken things into your own hands" by trying to provide for your family, or made some stupid decisions because you felt them to be best. Well as God himself told us:

Matthew 10:29-31
Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.

Unfortunately for me, I decided that I could take care of myself and my future family on my own. I left God out of the equation and began taking less time out of the day to make sure I'm in the right and walking the path I should walk. I can relate to your bands because of this very website you are on right now. I said to myself "Lord I made that website, wrote some studies for your approval, and keep it running!" The problem with that is I can still do more, and I lived on what I did do not what I should be doing. I maybe sense that is something you could say about your bands? We both got his name out there and did our good deeds, but then we just kinda left off there. Maybe we figured those good deeds would take care of us for a while? I don't know...

I know what you mean about that moment. It's where he says via different means that while we've done some things right, we still miss the boat. It's a moment of grace indeed where despite my failings God says it's okay, I still love you. I needed to let you stew in your own muck, but I love you enough to still be waiting with arms wide open my prodigal son.

Luke 15:20-24
And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. And the son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' But the father said to his servants, 'Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet. And bring the fattened calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate. For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.' And they began to celebrate.

I think this is a lesson specifically to Christians. The obvious application is to take this to believers and dealing with the lost, but I think it deals with believers and other believers.

Miss Hepburn has some very wise words. Satan is the accuser and he'll mire you down very quickly in guilt. Let it go and look forward. God is a prayer away indeed, but his forgiveness is so as well. We make mistakes, and we'll make them again. God will continue to forgive the repentant heart. Focus on what you can do, and do it now!

 

[Massiah]

Thank you for you're supportive replies ^_^
Don't worry im in a great church now! Its a baptist church (ive tried many different churchs, but did not feel the presence of God in any of them - which was a worry!)