What defines a marriage?

[Adam]

What defines a marriage?

Does the government justify a marriage? Well let's say you live in the jungle and there is no government, does this mean that nobody can righteously have children? Or if an evil government decided the world was overpopulated and nobody was allowed to get married, do they have this authority to nullify the will of God? Obviously not, so marriage is not justified by a legal certificate.

Is marriage justified by an oath to God? Certainly an oath to God has a lot of weight, but by this definition, atheists cannot be married. Does a Christian believe that it is okay to marry an atheist's wife because his vows are invalid? Obviously not, so an oath to God is not a requirement of a marriage.

So then what is marriage justified by? In my opinion: a marriage is created by oath between a man and woman to eachother. When a man and woman tell eachother they love eachother and want to be together, this is what marries them. A couple sleeping together, therefore, is not adultery if done out of genuine love, and if they have the intention of being together their whole lives. However, if that couple breaks up and sleeps with someone else, then that is adultery.

Adultery is a sin because it is wrong to hurt someone who loves you.

 

[-Phil]

What defines a marriage?

You.

 

[Good Ship]

What defines a marriage?

Does the government justify a marriage? Well let's say you live in the jungle and there is no government, does this mean that nobody can righteously have children? Or if an evil government decided the world was overpopulated and nobody was allowed to get married, do they have this authority to nullify the will of God? Obviously not, so marriage is not justified by a legal certificate.

Is marriage justified by an oath to God? Certainly an oath to God has a lot of weight, but by this definition, atheists cannot be married. Does a Christian believe that it is okay to marry an atheist's wife because his vows are invalid? Obviously not, so an oath to God is not a requirement of a marriage.

So then what is marriage justified by? In my opinion: a marriage is created by oath between a man and woman to eachother. When a man and woman tell eachother they love eachother and want to be together, this is what marries them. A couple sleeping together, therefore, is not adultery if done out of genuine love, and if they have the intention of being together their whole lives. However, if that couple breaks up and sleeps with someone else, then that is adultery.

Adultery is a sin because it is wrong to hurt someone who loves you.

Whatever marriage is, nobody seems to believe in it anymore. These days all I see is women throwing themselves at noncommittal men. They end up having friendship and sexual relations, and some time later the man breaks up the relationship. The woman then complains, “there are no good men left!” Yet the entire time there was a good man wanting a woman to commit to, but she wouldn’t give him a chance.

Because of women, I’m now in my mid-thirties and still a virgin. I won’t date or marry a woman who isn’t a virgin or whose had a boyfriend before because that means she is ruined, and her past would ruin my life. She chose to screw around with noncommittal men over me.

Marriage doesn’t really exist anymore because women think it’s okay to date and screw around with men who aren’t serious about anything.

 

[-Phil]

@Good Ship
You’re saying she wouldn’t give him a chance… while you’re ruling all women out.
Do you want a relationship?

 

[Behold]

What defines a marriage?

Biblically

1.) Flesh joining flesh
2.) shall leave father and mother and cleave to wife
3.) what God has joined together, let no person separate

Legally, according to your local law and stature

1.) Legal Marriage License
2.) Legal Marriage ceremony

 

[Adam]

Whatever marriage is, nobody seems to believe in it anymore. These days all I see is women throwing themselves at noncommittal men. They end up having friendship and sexual relations, and some time later the man breaks up the relationship. The woman then complains, “there are no good men left!” Yet the entire time there was a good man wanting a woman to commit to, but she wouldn’t give him a chance.

Because of women, I’m now in my mid-thirties and still a virgin. I won’t date or marry a woman who isn’t a virgin or whose had a boyfriend before because that means she is ruined, and her past would ruin my life. She chose to screw around with noncommittal men over me.

Marriage doesn’t really exist anymore because women think it’s okay to date and screw around with men who aren’t serious about anything.

You can't have this negative attitude towards people and expect to be happy. You're creating your own loneliness by walling yourself off from others.

 

[Jim B]

What defines a marriage?

Does the government justify a marriage? Well let's say you live in the jungle and there is no government, does this mean that nobody can righteously have children? Or if an evil government decided the world was overpopulated and nobody was allowed to get married, do they have this authority to nullify the will of God? Obviously not, so marriage is not justified by a legal certificate.

Is marriage justified by an oath to God? Certainly an oath to God has a lot of weight, but by this definition, atheists cannot be married. Does a Christian believe that it is okay to marry an atheist's wife because his vows are invalid? Obviously not, so an oath to God is not a requirement of a marriage.

So then what is marriage justified by? In my opinion: a marriage is created by oath between a man and woman to eachother. When a man and woman tell eachother they love eachother and want to be together, this is what marries them. A couple sleeping together, therefore, is not adultery if done out of genuine love, and if they have the intention of being together their whole lives. However, if that couple breaks up and sleeps with someone else, then that is adultery.

Adultery is a sin because it is wrong to hurt someone who loves you.

I agree with you -- in principle. To me, marriage is defined by what Adam said: "Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; this one shall be called Woman, for out of Man this one was taken.” Genesis 2:23 (NRSVue) Adam knew that he was joined to Eve. There was no spiritual difference between the two people.

I have been married or 53 years. Although my wife and I are separate people, we have been joined spiritually. We belong to each other! I do nothing without considering how it affects my wife, and vice-versa. Do we make mistakes? Of course! Do we love each other? Without question!

 

[-Phil]

@Good Ship

 

[Good Ship]

@Good Ship
You’re saying she wouldn’t give him a chance… while you’re ruling all women out.
Do you want a relationship?

I don’t want a wife who isn’t a virgin and had a boyfriend or boyfriends before. Her past would ruin my life.

 

[-Phil]

I don’t want a wife who isn’t a virgin and had a boyfriend or boyfriends before. Her past would ruin my life.

You’re pickin a relationship or your own judgment. One of them don’t keep ya warm at night brother.
We are so free we can hold ourselves in bondage.

No one cares about what you don’t want, especially you. You can have what you do want. Focus is the key. Alignment happens naturally.

Truly, there is no past. Only thoughts experienced now about there being a past.

 

[Adam]

I don’t want a wife who isn’t a virgin and had a boyfriend or boyfriends before. Her past would ruin my life.

You know, my wife had a friend in her early 20s. After this girl got dumped, my wife wanted to see if she could set her up with some of my friends, men who were loyal, financially stable and good-looking. So my wife asked the girl what kind of guy she was looking for. Here is what she said "he has to be a vegan and also a bodybuilder and into nerd culture and he has to dress in hipster fashion and blah blah blah blah" and I was astonished... who is this person she invented in her head? It is someone she entirely made up that she was convinced was her dream husband, and yet it was all superficial, haircuts and clothes, but never once did she mention personality. So my wife showed her some of my friends, and she rejected them all based on their facebook profile alone; and by now they are married and she is not.

At the age of 30, almost everyone will have or have had some sort of relationship. Do you know any women who are interested in you who have never had a boyfriend? Instead of just chasing the fantasy, look at the people around you. And if there are none, then go where there are people. Find someone who makes you happy and don't worry about superficial things like who looks cute or who had a boyfriend before. Date a real person, not a mental construct.

 

[Good Ship]

You know, my wife had a friend in her early 20s. After this girl got dumped, my wife wanted to see if she could set her up with some of my friends, men who were loyal, financially stable and good-looking. So my wife asked the girl what kind of guy she was looking for. Here is what she said "he has to be a vegan and also a bodybuilder and into nerd culture and he has to dress in hipster fashion and blah blah blah blah" and I was astonished... who is this person she invented in her head? It is someone she entirely made up that she was convinced was her dream husband, and yet it was all superficial, haircuts and clothes, but never once did she mention personality. So my wife showed her some of my friends, and she rejected them all based on their facebook profile alone; and by now they are married and she is not.

At the age of 30, almost everyone will have or have had some sort of relationship. Do you know any women who are interested in you who have never had a boyfriend? Instead of just chasing the fantasy, look at the people around you. And if there are none, then go where there are people. Find someone who makes you happy and don't worry about superficial things like who looks cute or who had a boyfriend before. Date a real person, not a mental construct.

I’m not interested in finding a wife who is 30 or older. If a woman hasn’t been married by that age, she has already accumulated many sex partners (and probably a disease or two). She also has baggage from screwing around with noncommittal men while ignoring commitment-minded men, all the while thinking “no good men exist” when she was never interested in good men in the first place.

Why should I approach such a terrible person for marriage in the first place? Marrying her would disgust me. I’m only interested in girls who are young so I can find a virgin with no boyfriend before.

There isn’t anything wrong with a large age gap between a husband and wife. That is actually how things have been for most of human history.

 

[Pearl]

I’m not interested in finding a wife who is 30 or older. If a woman hasn’t been married by that age, she has already accumulated many sex partners (and probably a disease or two). She also has baggage from screwing around with noncommittal men while ignoring commitment-minded men, all the while thinking “no good men exist” when she was never interested in good men in the first place.

Why should I approach such a terrible person for marriage in the first place? Marrying her would disgust me. I’m only interested in girls who are young so I can find a virgin with no boyfriend before.

There isn’t anything wrong with a large age gap between a husband and wife. That is actually how things have been for most of human history.

Sounds like you should stay celibate and unmarried as you have such ideals that any normal woman wouldn't be able to live up to. BUT if you want God to give you a woman you should be pleased to accept his choice for you.

 

[-Phil]

@Good Ship
Denial of judging is not the healthy road to feeling the way you want to feel nor experiencing what you want to experience.
The way to be without the discord of judgement is to first acknowledge the source of it.

 

[Pearl]

Every marriage is unique as it consists of two unique people in partnership. And people don't all have the same requirements in a marriage. Some marry for convenience, some marriages are arranged by parents, some marry for money and some because of infatuation. So you see not everyone marries for love. Those who do marry for love should never need anybody else.

For a good marriage the couple need to respect each other and trust each other. They should desire the best for each other and make each other laugh.

The thing is though that even a couple who have not stood in a church building before a priest,vicar or minister can be considered married in God's eyes because they have been physically joined. I know this is not accepted by many Christians because of the church teachings. And it was the church which ordained marriage as we think of it today, not God.

 

[Adam]

I’m not interested in finding a wife who is 30 or older. If a woman hasn’t been married by that age, she has already accumulated many sex partners (and probably a disease or two). She also has baggage from screwing around with noncommittal men while ignoring commitment-minded men, all the while thinking “no good men exist” when she was never interested in good men in the first place.

You sure have a lot of ideas of what women you haven't met are supposedly like. There are some women who sleep around freely, and those women are known as skanks. When pick up artists talk about how to pick up women, they are talking about how to pick up skanks, because they are male-skanks and normal women can see them from a mile away and avoid them, just like normal men avoid female-skanks. The great majority of women are very selective about who they are with and stay with men for long term, and if the man is abusive or an alcoholic or unfaithful, it is only with great reluctance and sadness that they leave them. If you are in an environment where you are surrounded by low quality women (bars, nightclubs, tinder, etc.) then it would be better to avoid such a place. Maybe take up charity work or something and you'll run into lots of good-hearted people.

Why should I approach such a terrible person for marriage in the first place? Marrying her would disgust me. I’m only interested in girls who are young so I can find a virgin with no boyfriend before.

If you did find your pure and innocent 18 year old virgin, don't you think she would be repelled by your years of bitterness and resentment? You say that a person can't be 30 and single without acquiring baggage, so just look at yourself, and see that you have baggage too now in the form of a chip on your shoulder against women. Do you want to saddle all that bitterness onto a young person who is just experiencing love for the first time? Just find someone you can talk to who is on the same level as you.

There isn’t anything wrong with a large age gap between a husband and wife. That is actually how things have been for most of human history.

It's also customary in human history for an eligible and sought-after young woman to have multiple suitors who are all vying for her attention. Gentleman suitors would write letters to a girl for months, give them gifts, and so on, while other men were doing the same, and she would pick one of them to be engaged to (or her father would pick). So what you want isn't really based off of history, it is based off of fantasy, of some perfect dream girl falling into your lap for no reason at all and with no competition. I think you set your standards impossibly high because of a fear of rejection "They're not rejecting me, I am rejecting them!". It's like a porcupine that wants to be close to other porcupines, but each time it gets close to another porcupine, it is pricked by their spines; so in order to protect itself, it juts out its spines and keeps them away, and so ends up even more alone.

 

[Jim B]

I’m not interested in finding a wife who is 30 or older. If a woman hasn’t been married by that age, she has already accumulated many sex partners (and probably a disease or two). She also has baggage from screwing around with noncommittal men while ignoring commitment-minded men, all the while thinking “no good men exist” when she was never interested in good men in the first place.

Why should I approach such a terrible person for marriage in the first place? Marrying her would disgust me. I’m only interested in girls who are young so I can find a virgin with no boyfriend before.

There isn’t anything wrong with a large age gap between a husband and wife. That is actually how things have been for most of human history.

Are you okay??? How can you write stuff like "If a woman hasn’t been married by that age, she has already accumulated many sex partners (and probably a disease or two). She also has baggage from screwing around with noncommittal men while ignoring commitment-minded men, all the while thinking “no good men exist” when she was never interested in good men in the first place." These are very twisted assumptions tha exist solely in your imagination, but not in reality.

"I’m only interested in girls who are young so I can find a virgin with no boyfriend before" sounds very, very strange to me. Are you ogling junior high school girls?

 

[amigo de christo]

WHO defines marriage . GOD DOES . what defines marriage , the BIBLE DOES .
one man and one woman . not eve and ellen and not adam and steve .

 

[-Phil]

WHO defines marriage . GOD DOES . what defines marriage , the BIBLE DOES .
one man and one woman . not eve and ellen and not adam and steve .

And who defines God apparently - @amigo de christo !

 

[Good Ship]

Are you okay??? How can you write stuff like "If a woman hasn’t been married by that age, she has already accumulated many sex partners (and probably a disease or two). She also has baggage from screwing around with noncommittal men while ignoring commitment-minded men, all the while thinking “no good men exist” when she was never interested in good men in the first place." These are very twisted assumptions tha exist solely in your imagination, but not in reality.

"I’m only interested in girls who are young so I can find a virgin with no boyfriend before" sounds very, very strange to me. Are you ogling junior high school girls?

I don’t care if there is a large age gap between me and my wife. It’s legal to marry an 18-year-old girl, so what’s the problem? Women in their 20s and 30s have already been screwed before hundreds or more likely thousands of times. They are ruined. If I married such a person, her past would ruin my life.