I don't think someone deserves to be hated for being sad and lonely, but rather that one should be sympathied with for it, yet if one is causing their own loneliness it would be better to bring them to see what is causing them to suffer, without casting shame on them. It would be hypocritical to shame someone purely because they saw fit to shame others, as you become guilty of that which you accuse them of.
Yet it is also hypocritical to cast shame on unmarried 30 year olds, as an unmarried 30 year old. I don't suppose that any 18 year old young man ever sat by the window wishing for a jaded, man-hating 30-something year old woman to be their fiancee. So the metric which one uses to judge others should be based on the metric they wish to be measured against.
Matthew 7
7 Judge not, that ye be not judged.
2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
But there are plenty of lonely 20 and 30 year olds in the world looking for someone who will accept them and sympathize with them for their own pains. So why not then, as a 30 year old with rough spots, not take comfort in another 30 year old with rough spots? Time will only pass for the both of them and this question will only get harder for those concerned with age.