bought new ones. At first one pack at a time not wanting to invest (not money but time) on a carton. But then, a carton. Don’t get me wrong …I’m not beating myself up. I’m not saying others have to agree but I’m not wanting to quit because I think God is saying “I will only love you if…”
I’m also not wanting to quit because I think quitting will earn me by the choice to quit…the escape of consequences of smoking since I was a teen. I get there are consequences. I want to quit because I want to live. Not extend my life…but have quality of life because I feel there is so much worth living for. For example getting closer to God, making better choices than before, to see what He has planned and to experience love, joy, peace. I’m not beating myself up. I want to quit because I want to run, leap, praise…I want to live. Smoking drains me …as does anxiety, panic, worry and doubt. I equally want to focus less on those things. Does that make sense?