Clean Jokes Thread

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Mancunian

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I asked my German friend if he had any children, he said "nine"
I thought, wow that's a lot.
 

Mancunian

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I asked my wife where she would like to go on holiday, she said "Hungary"
I said " I wouldn't mind a McDonald's."
 

Mancunian

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My friend just keeps having affairs.
I'm sure that he thinks that monogamy is a type of wood.
 

Matthias

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During my wife's labour, the nurse came up to her and said, "How about Epidural Anaesthesia?"

She said, "Thanks, but we've already picked a name."