Personally I have to go before my father since we are admonished not to call any man father upon this earth. If that's all that others can do then God must speak to it.
Matthew 23:9 KJVS
And call no man your father upon the earth: for one is your Father, which is in heaven.
No man, no preacher, no evangelist, no deacon, no priest no reverend, no pastor, no man came to me and convicted, instructed me to repent and forgave my sin. Jesus alone. I owe no man to tell of my personal failures though in my house we sit and speak of the Lord, our failures, our learning. Our afflictions, travails, victories and defeats. Two or more is the base rule.
Ezekiel chapter 34 is my personal testimony. I shook no preacher's hand, walked no aisle, signed no book and am not beholding to any of man's created denominations. I do owe a debt of gratitude to those that prayed for my salvation. Especially my uncle Douglas Franklin who prayed for me for years.
Psalm 62:8 tells me to pour out my heart before Him, He is a refuge for me. Men can give comfort but only Jesus can give divine and final absolution. We can tell each other of our failures - sins - but only the judge of all has the final say.
Once we forgive a person are they free, exonerated, held blameless from their offense? Even if they are completely unrepentant? That's God's decision.
We must not hold unforgivness against another as it can be to their condemnation and certainly will be to ours. After we forgive we are free whether or not the offending party repents. After we forgive another the matter is between them and the Lord. We are released whether or not they are. We have obeyed the master.
Once a family member touched my small young daughter thinking they could get away with it. Our daughter being a born again Christian by age 4 came and told us of the matter. She couldn't have been over 5.
As a father I don't know whether you can comprehend my feelings or not. You might guess them. I took this family member aside and spoke with him telling that my daughter had told her mother and I about what he'd done. I told him that we forgave him. I also told him that were it not for Jesus I don't know what I would have done. Assaults upon your children bring up emotions you were ignorant of.
Perhaps I should never relate anything personal here before strangers? We come to know each other to a degree. However many deep relationships began with mere letters. Perhaps I go far beyond the pale in my testimonies. I see little of such things from others. Maybe by being completely open about my life someone is helped, I'm not sure but I hope. There are many silent readers that never post or announce their presence. Often I sense a restraint from others to relate, to share, to pour out their heart about such gut rending things. If I'm a fool for baring my heart then I pray it's for Jesus. I don't mind being a fool for Him.
The family member that had offended and sinned against my child seemed repentant and I think they were. Several years later at the age of 30 this man went out one night, doused himself with gasoline and set himself on fire. Neighbors called 911 and he was taken to ACH, Arkansas Children's Hospital. His father called to tell me.
He was burned over more than 30 % of his body with 3rd degree burns. He was rallying so my wife and I went to a movie to get out of the house. The movie was "the perfect storm" a true story about a fishing vessel that sank in a storm.
The main character Bobby, shared his name with our family member. As the man floated on the huge waves awaiting death his life memories ran through his mind, faces of loved ones clearly framed. In the midst of that film surrounded by a crowd of strangers, Martha and I began to cry. I suppose those that noticed thought it was the movie. We knew right then Bobby was about to die and would not live. The Lord spoke to us through that man made thing.
We were called to the hospital the very next day as Bobby's condition was terminal. As his father and I stood next to Bobby's bed we listened to the doctor's report. Only the life support systems were holding him in life. Once he had told me he loved me more than his own father. What a waste of life. He had many other afflictions but not due to a sin filled life.
As a small boy His parents would leave him and his brother alone all weekend while they went to party. The boys were about 6 and 8 at the time. They would leave them with food but totally alone. Neighbors reported seeing them under a street light in the wee hours of the morning awaiting for their heartless parents to come home. I wish I'd have taken legal action. Their mother was one of the coldest, truly amoral people I ever knew.
Bobby was completely broken mentally and the Lord is the judge in such matters. He was not in control when he did this thing.
Bobby's father's reply to the doctor was brief, "pull the plugs". I watched as the white curved line on the monitor went from the zig zag sinus rythym indicating life to a straight horizontal one. Bobby was gone. His mother was divorced from his father and had planned to go camping with no thought of attending her sons funeral. Her roommate talked her into going, entirely against her will. My wife wept through the chapel service and Bobby's mother elbowing her all the while.
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Bobby about 11 fishing at our pond.
Our discussions here must be more than some sort of mental exercise. They must really be able to help others in their spiritual life. If all I ever share is regarded as a good read or an interesting testimony then I have poured out my heart in vain. I refuse to share anything if it's not really from my heart.
Perhaps, just perhaps someone is actually helped, guided, influenced toward the Lord by such real life accounts such as this one. I pray so. I do feel alone in these testimonies I must say.
Confession must be to God. Our forgiveness must be sincere. We are all yearning for forgiveness and complete acceptance by the Lord. We share these things with others and in so doing we can stir up in them a self examination regarding their own sins.
James 5:16 KJVS
Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
Sin is not just a Bible word. It has killed more people that all diseases and wars combined. Jesus is the only antidote.
