I have considered myself a Christian for a long time. To make a long story short I am very analytical, suffer from OCD/anxiety which is a tough combination with wanting certainity. I spend day and night in my head "trying" and "wanting" to have that assurance that so many seem to have but it is not in my genetic wiring I suppose. It seems that it is much more "hoping" in my head rather then "knowing" One of my favorite apologist has described himself similar to myself...none the less it's a difficult path.I won't even get into the different "sides" of Christianity who adamantly claim the doctrine they subscribe to is correct, Calvinists, arminian, etc..none the less I suppose I am inquiring to see if anyone can relate.