I was raised in an very Christian environment literally from when I was born. The funny thing is, I can't recall any time where I believed it. Even as a youngster it didn't make sense to me. And when I'd ask questions I'd either get (what seemed to me) nonsense answers like "just have faith", or be chastised for daring to question the faith in the first place.
But overall, the story Christianity tells from Genesis through Revelations just doesn't make sense to me. When I try and think of it as the way a god would do things, it makes even less sense. But when I put it in the context of it being one among countless religions that humans have invented throughout history, it makes sense.
"I was raised in an very Christian environment literally from when I was born."
That is probably where a definition of Christianity probably does help.
Some "Christianity" creates communities that seem more like hell.
Some Christianity seems to create communities that are wonderful to be a part of.
"I can't recall any time where I believed it."
For me, that depended on what people wanted me to believe haha - but I can understand that.
"it didn't make sense to me"
Nor me. there are holes in my faith where I don't know whats going on haha.
Why does God require a sacrifice? What does that say about the quality of God that he needs such things?
Why His son?
How can God have a son?
These sorts of questions start pretty simple but soon get deeper and deeper - shortly, I find no one has a satisfactory answer that brings everything into harmony. (People do their best to explain stuff - but I'm pretty sure they are making a mess - "We see in part" as the saying goes)
Mysteries??.
"...nonsense answers like "just have faith", or be chastised for daring to question the faith in the first place."
That doesn't sound like a "good" God to me.
I know people might say they worship a person called Jesus - but what is their "Jesus" like?
Is He mean, aggressive, a tyrant, abusive? Loving, generous, kind, good, funny?
Those people - Do they value?
Being right all the time? Punishment? "Tough Love"?
grace? love? mercy? forgiveness? forebearance?
The answers to the above questions tell me more about who they serve than the name of who they serve.
In summary - "No questions" doesn't sound like it's from a loving God to me.
"...Genesis through Revelations just doesn't make sense to me. When I try and think of it as the way a god would do things, it makes even less sense..."
Nor me all the time.
If God started speaking with no filter for our feeble minds, our heads would probably explode from astonishment. haha.
Job, at the end of all the disasters he suffers asks God why all this happened. I think God basically said "...if you can't understand the basics of how the universe works, you would never understand any answer I gave you about why the disasters happened"
???
Anyway - best wishes on your search for answers - If you get any ideas - let me know haha