Jokes, fun and comedy

[April_Rose]

Btw,.. watching a movie right now but I'll get caught up on this thread later.

 

[April_Rose]

That is a little like the gag,
"If a man says something in the forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong...?"

Oh and btw,.. that's now posted on our other website since somebody was asking why God needed to make Eve.

 

[April_Rose]

This poor woman she is so cluless!

Surprised that cursing videos are allowed but I probably would have said Ma and I've seen this one before btw. XD

We spell it m-u-m = mum in Australia.

FYI I usually call my mum, mummy, and yes I do sometimes call her mummeeee with the extra E's lolz, I also call her mumma.

And you are full of balognee. (Yes I misspelled this on purpose. XD)

Some old dude was arrested recently somewhere in Europe for farting. Serious.

If that was me I would have gotten the death penalty by now.

What is the definition of a "fanatic...?"

Spoiler

Someone who loves God more than you do...!

Huh??

A highway patrolman was sitting on the side of the road when a car sped past him down the middle of the road! Giving chase, he pulled over the errant speedster one mile later.

"Do you realize that you were doing 75mph in a 45mph zone?"
"Yes, sir."
"Where are you coming from this evening?"
"From the DMV. I just got my license!"
"Why were you driving so fast?"
"I was just following the instructions on their form."
"How so?"
"It said, 'Tear along the dotted line...' "

I don't really get this one. :\

Lol it really looks like he's laughing and the laughter is contagious.

Protect what's yours at any cost!!!! Beware of the enemy that tries to sneak up and steal your bone! Hahaha!

This gives whole new meaning to the phrase "you are your own worst enemy."

Found this one on Facebook.
View attachment 10565

What are we supposed to be looking for?

An old Maori farmer writes to his son in prison; Kia ora my son, this year i wont be able to plant the kumara and potatoes because i can't dig the field by myself, i know if you were here, you would help me son
The son writes back; Kia ora dad don't even think of digging the field because thats where i buried all the money i stole
‍ The police read what the Son wrote in the letter and the next day the whole field was dug up and the Police were looking for the money but nothing was found ‍
The following day the son wrote again.... Now plant the potatoes and kumara dad.. Its the best i can do from here..

Is the twist that the son is in prison instead of the father?

 

[April_Rose]

Naming countries on a map.

I probably would have said the USA, Canada, or Australia. I think Greenland was also on there...

 

[Sabertooth]

Huh??

"Fanatic" is a word that jealous people use...

I don't really get this one. :\

Broken stripes in the middle of the road look like a "dotted line."
"Tear along" is slang for speeding, like,
"He really tore out of here...!"

 

[Sabertooth]

Is the twist that the son is in prison instead of the father?

The son (because he was in prison) wasn't able to plow the field this year.
By suggesting that he buried the money in his dad's field, he tricked the police to plowing it up (for free), as they were looking for it.

 

[April_Rose]

"Fanatic" is a word that jealous people use...

Broken stripes in the middle of the road look like a "dotted line."
"Tear along" is slang for speeding, like,
"He really tore out of here...!"

I get the second part now,.. but what does the first thing have anything to do with God though?

The son (because he was in prison) wasn't able to plow the field this year.
By suggesting that he buried the money in his dad's field, he tricked the police to plowing it up (for free), as they were looking for it.

Oh okay,.. now I get this one.

 

[April_Rose]

I think this video has swearing in it,.. but even a staff member posted one with cussing so I should be fine. XD (I'll remove it though if asked.) @Josho. (The guilty party staff member I was referring to with your name a country video. )





Edit: I found a non swearing video instead. @Josho

 

[April_Rose]

Here's another one btw.

 

[Sabertooth]

what does the first thing have anything to do with God though?

It is like saying, "Anyone who loves God more than I do has to be a 'fanatic...!' "

 

[April_Rose]

It is like saying, "Anyone who loves God more than I do has to be a 'fanatic...!' "

Ohh,.. umm,.. okay,.. lol

 

[Heart2Soul]

Surprised that cursing videos are allowed but I probably would have said Ma and I've seen this one before btw. XD

Was there cursing? I didn't catch it if there was. Sorry if it offended you. I will delete it.
God Bless.

 

[April_Rose]

Was there cursing? I didn't catch it if there was. Sorry if it offended you. I will delete it.
God Bless.

Honey,.. I'm currently writing a story about God in human form who sings rock and roll music,.. I don't think much offends me.

 

[Heart2Soul]

Honey,.. I'm currently writing a story about God in human form who sings rock and roll music,.. I don't think much offends me.

There are some people that really get into the spirit of worship with rock and roll....I think it's all about the message and the anointing on the music. Wherever and whenever His people gather together to sing praises to Him there He is in the midst of them.
❤

 

[Sabertooth]

It's Greek to Me...​

Did you know that college rowing teams have a fraternity...?

Spoiler: Really?

Yes, it's called PPP.

 

[Josho]

Every Aussie will understand this one.

@marksman @Backlit @OzSpen @Scoot @Cristo Rei @Jay Ross @quietthinker

 

[Ferris Bueller]

Chinese proverb: "Man who fart in Church, sit in own pew."

This one never gets old, lol.

 

[Sabertooth]

This is a skit that they played on Christian skate night, when I was in youth group,

Rapture Airlines, Isaac Air Freight (1978)

 

[Josho]

Me as the Wolverine, I just discovered an app called "re-face" haha it is so much fun.

@April_Rose @Devin Wintch @historyb @Mayflower

 

[Josho]

Spider-Josh