The Pun thread

[marksman]

Why did the M & M go to school?

It wanted to be a Smartie.

 

[farouk]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because it wanted to get to the other side...

 

[Taken]

Why did the M & M go to school?

It wanted to be a Smartie.

Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the M & M factory?

He was throwing out all the W's.

 

[farouk]

Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the M & M factory?

He was throwing out all the W's.

Good one...

 

[marksman]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because it wanted to get to the other side...

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get his old age pension. Do you get it?
No. Neither did he.

 

[Taken]

2 words, A maze, don't mazes amaze you?

Good one.

I like mazes. They test your logic by making the illogical necessary to conclude the logical.(must go Up to get down...must go left to end up right)...(Scripturally, must become Dead, Before one can Become Forever Alive).

 

[Taken]

If you are American and enter a restroom..
And are American when you exit the restroom...
What are you while you are in the restroom?
European

 

[Jay Ross]

If you are American and enter a restroom..
And are American when you exit the restroom...
What are you while you are in the restroom?
European

Why are the Americans any different to anyone else.

They are simply relieved like everybody else who enters the restroom/dunny.

 

[Taken]

Why are the Americans any different to anyone else.

They are simply relieved like everybody else who enters the restroom/dunny.

Maybe it's the word REST-room that Americans enjoy.

 

[Taken]

England doesn't have a kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

 

[Taken]

The invention of the wheel created a revolution.

 

[Taken]

Being in debt attracts a lot of interest from bankers.

 

[marksman]

The invention of the wheel created a revolution.

And we have been going round in circles ever since.

 

[marksman]

What sort of suit does a Barrister wear to court?

A lawsuit.

 

[Taken]

And we have been going round in circles ever since.

Some people go in circles with one foot nailed to the floor.
Some people work circles around other people.
Some people scrub in circles.
Always two sides to a circle.

 

[Taken]

What sort of suit does a Barrister wear to court?

A lawsuit.

A lawsuit, represented by a guy Wearing a suit, for a guy Wearing suit.

 

[Jay Ross]

Some people go in circles with one foot nailed to the floor.
Some people work circles around other people.
Some people scrub in circles.
Always two sides to a circle.

In the limit, as the radius of a circle approaches infinity, the circumference of the circle becomes a straight line as dy²/dx² becomes, for all practical purposes, 0 at any apparent point on that circle.

 

[farouk]

Being in debt attracts a lot of interest from bankers.

If you owe the government $1000, it will get the $1000 from you. If you owe the government $500,000,000, you get to tell the government what to do...

 

[Taken]

In the limit, as the radius of a circle approaches infinity, the circumference of the circle becomes a straight line as dy²/dx² becomes, for all practical purposes, 0 at any apparent point on that circle.

Sounds powerful.

 

[Sabertooth]

Sometimes, when my kids were growing up, I would offer them vegetables as a snack choice from which they would quickly flee.
I call that the phyto-flight response...!