Aren't you going a little bit off the "deep end"?
You're writing that if changing your gender pronouns is a valid choice, people should not have to be coerced, bullied, labeled, threatened, or controlled to go along with it. They can choose to go along voluntarily but it is still their choice in the end. People have the option to express their preferences.
Since by your profile you are a woman of color, should the same standard be applied to you? People can call you by whatever derogatory racist term that they choose and that's okay? I am a Jew, and I certainly don't want derogatory slurs used to reference me.
It seems that your problem is with gender not vocabulary.